


Lillian of the Commonwealth

by Jeneralx9



Category: Fallout (Video Games), Fallout 4
Genre: Angst, Cross-Posted on FanFiction.Net, Dialogue Heavy, Eventual Romance, F/M, Hurt/Comfort, Reminiscing, Slow Burn
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-10-26
Updated: 2021-01-15
Packaged: 2021-03-09 05:13:42
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 14
Words: 49,449
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27208702
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Jeneralx9/pseuds/Jeneralx9
Summary: Lillian Parker had the nightmare again. The sirens blaring. Running up the hill to the vault. People shouting and crying. The enormous nuclear blast. Her husband shouting. A gunshot and blood. Her baby crying then fading away. And she couldn't do a thing about it.She rolled over to reach for Nate for comfort, but there was no one. She opened her eyes and saw the worn walls and the makeshift curtains over the windows. The bedding smelled musty and the air was bitter. It wasn't a nightmare after all. Her husband really was dead and her baby really had been taken away.---Follow Lillian on her journey to find her missing son, and as she meets new friends, lovers, and a whole lot of enemies along the way.
Relationships: Nate/Female Sole Survivor, Paladin Danse/Female Sole Survivor, Robert Joseph MacCready & Female Sole Survivor
Comments: 2
Kudos: 20





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This has been moved through three laptops so far and I think I should just post it already.

Lillian Parker had the nightmare again. The sirens blaring. Running up the hill to the vault. People shouting and crying. The enormous nuclear blast. Her husband shouting. A gunshot and blood. Her baby crying then fading away. And she couldn't do a thing about it. 

She rolled over to reach for Nate for comfort, but there was no one. She opened her eyes and saw the worn walls and the makeshift curtains over the windows. The bedding smelled musty and the air was bitter. It wasn't a nightmare after all. Her husband really was dead and her baby really had been taken away. 

It had been three days since she left Vault 111. Everyone else was dead. She was angry at herself for believing Vault-Tec would take care of them when the bombs dropped. Of course they were up to something, otherwise they would've had to pay for their spot like some of the others. But it was due to Nate's military service and her significant, albeit short, career as a professional ballet dancer that gained them automatic entry. All they had to do was confirm things with the Vault-Tec representative who showed up on their doorstep that morning. Did he know what was going to happen to them? He had the nerve to look her straight in the face and tell her they would all be safe. Did he mean that they would be safe while Vault-Tec decided to experiment on them? What did the terminal say, something about the effects of cryogenic suspension on unknowing human subjects. Assholes. 

Lillian angrily wiped away the tears on her face and sat up. Where the big, comfortable bed she had once shared with Nate was now just a sleeping bag and a straw pillow on a homemade wooden cot. Far less comfortable, but better than nothing. The neighbourhood was in ruins but some houses, including hers, remained standing. Very few of their belongings remained, having been picked over by scavengers over the years. 

She was still in shock that it had been over 200 years since they ran to the vault. Their Mr. Handy, Codsworth, was surprisingly still around. They had to leave him behind when the sirens were blaring, but he dutifully stuck around to try to keep the house tidy. She supposed he gave up after so long since it was a mess by the time she got here. It was Codsworth who told her she'd been gone for 210 years. She almost didn't believe it, but then she remembered the gigantic roaches she had to kill in the vault. Those don't just mutate overnight. Then they had to kill gigantic flies lurking in some of the houses. Luckily Codsworth took care of those. She was too frightened to take care of them herself. 

There was no one else in Sanctuary, only a few skeletons. Codsworth said a few people stayed, but eventually moved on. "Can't handle a friendly face, I'd say!" he chortled. Clearly a couple hundred years on his own had taken its toll. 

She got up and changed out of the old dress she was using as a nightgown into the jeans and leather jacket she had found. Her only item of clothing when she left the vault was that awful vault suit and she wanted to get out of it as soon as possible. 

"What shall you do with the vault suit, mum?" Codsworth had asked.

"Burn it." Lillian didn't want a reminder of Vault 111, though she had no choice but to remember. The body of her husband was still down there in his cryopod. The bodies of all the other vault residents, some of them her own friends and neighbours, were still down there too. All dead. According to the terminals, the life support for all the pods were deactivated. All of them, except for hers and Nate's. 

  
_"Are you sure about this, hon?" she asked as they looked through the pamphlets spread across the table._

_"It's peace of mind, right?" Nate said, "Besides, there's a good chance we'll never actually have to go."_

_"And you're sure they said we didn't need to pay?"_

_"The letter says it's due to my, hold on, what did it say... Ah. Due to my 'exemplary military service', so good thing you married me."_

_"It also says it's because of my own dance career and 'contribution to culture'." She smiled, then sighed. "You really think we'll have time to raise Shaun before we need to go to the vault? I'd hate for him to grow up without being outside."_

_"There's nothing to worry about," he reassured her, "Besides, by the time we need to go down to the vault, I'm sure we'll have at least four more children to bring with us."_

_"Four?!"_

_"Or five? I feel like we should have an even number."_

_"At least those ones will be planned," she laughed._

  
Nate had been shot when two people, one in an odd hazmat suit, had opened the pod and took their 5-month-old son, Shaun. Nate tried to keep the hazmat suit from taking their baby, but the bald, rough-looking man shot him. Lillian could only watch from her pod across from them, which was still locked. A few moments later everything had gone black. 

When she woke again, the pod was opened but there was no one else. Everyone was dead. Skeletons were littered throughout the vault, the result of an apparent uprising of the vault guards when the overseer refused to open the door when their supplies were running low. She had read all this on the overseer's terminal before leaving the vault. She wanted answers. That's when she discovered it was all an experiment. A fucking experiment on not only Lillian, Nate, and their friends and neighbours, but also their baby. 

Maybe it was Vault-Tec who took Shaun. Maybe they knew the life supports wouldn't last and they decided to take the baby for whatever reason. But why did she survive? Why was she the only one left alive? The bald man had come right up to her pod, looked at her and called her the back-up. What did that mean? 

It doesn't matter now. All that matters now is she needs to find Shaun. But she doesn't know where to start. Where would they have taken a baby? Another vault? Some sort of laboratory? Codsworth unfortunately hadn't noticed anything strange happening up near the vault entrance. He said that people have come and gone over the years, but no one with a baby and he would have certainly recognized Shaun. 

At least she knew people were still around. Codsworth had mentioned going to Concord to look for help, though the people there had shot at him a few times. Lillian was unsure about it. Everything just felt overwhelming. She opted to stay in Sanctuary for a short while and try to get used to this new world. 

For the past few days, she and Codsworth had been tidying up the old house, repairing what they could. They had been able to scrap a fair bit from the neighbour's houses to shore up holes in walls and the roof. They were even able to make a water purifier. It wasn't quite perfect, but it was better than nothing and certainly better than drinking the irradiated water from the stream. Old cans of beans were her main source of food until Codsworth insisted on cooking up the giant roaches and flies. She was very hesitant on trying them, but they turned out not too bad. Just could used some spices. 

  
_"Did you get your present?" Nate asked through the video caller._

_"Why on earth do we need a Mr. Handy?" she asked._

_"You need to rest, what with that parasite infection," he grinned._

_"I'm pregnant, you prick, with YOUR parasite," she rolled her eyes. "Besides, my mother and granddad are here, and your parents and sister are planning on coming too. At this rate, you'll have to sleep with the dog when you come home."_

_"But after they leave, that robot can help out with chores and stuff. Clifford says he and his wife barely got any sleep when they had their kids."_

_"They had triplets, so it's understandable. We're having just one baby."_

_"You sure? You are looking pretty big there. Sometimes I'm not sure if I'm talking to my pregnant wife or to an airship."_

_"You are so lucky I can't wallop you right now," she laughed. "Granddad's setting up the Mr. Handy now. Should it have a name?"_

_"I've always liked Junky McJefferson. Oh wait, I wanted that name for our child."_

_"Shut up. The manual had a list of names we could use. Do you want to choose one?"_

_"Nah, I'll trust your judgment." He paused. "I miss you."_

_"I miss you, too."_

  
She could hear Codsworth humming 'La Marseillaise', returning from his regular rounds around the neighbourhood and getting rid of any new bloatflies that come in. She headed down the hallway and greeted him as he came in through the front door. 

"Good morning, mum!" he said cheerfully. "I'm afraid once again your morning coffee will not be served, but perhaps some nice, cold water will hit the spot!" 

"Thanks Codsworth," she said as she took the bottle of water from him. She sat down at the table and took a sip. 

"Already done with your morning exercise?" he asked. 

"No, no point any more," she replied. 

"Tut tut, Miss Lillian, 'physical activity preserves the good condition of every human being'." 

Lillian sighed, then smiled a bit. "Alright then."

"Excellent! I shall prepare breakfast." He zipped out the door to the campfire they had made. They hadn't yet been able to produce electricity to get the stove working. Lillian stripped down to her underwear, not having been able to find any proper exercise clothing, and stood next to the island counter. She closed her eyes and imagined music playing as she ran through her usual warmups. She didn't have a proper barre any more, but the counter would do for now. 

  
_"What is that for?" Nate asked as Lillian carried a long wooden pole into the house._

_"I told you last night I was going to set up a barre in the house," she replied, setting it down._

_"Did you?" Nate stood from the couch and looked down at the barre._

_"Yes, dummy," she smiled at him, "Pay attention."_

_"I was paying attention," he grinned back._

_"I know you were, just not to anything I was saying."_

_"Didn't even realise you were speaking," he said and received a light smack on the back of the head in response. "So you said you wanted this in the spare room?" He picked up the barre._

_"Yep, and once that's in there I can move in the holotape player."_

_"Hey, that's supposed to be for both of us, remember?" Nate carried the barre into the spare room with Lillian following._

_"Why are you trying to hinder my exercising? Do you want me to get fat?" she feigned shock._

_"At least if you get fat, you can't run away," he dropped the barre then grabbed her by the waist. She shrieked with laughter as he tickled her. He grunted as he picked her up, acting as if she was ten times heavier than she actually was._

_"Look at that, looks like all your lazing about hasn't turned you weak," she giggled._

_"Well maybe we should work out together," he kissed her and carried her into the bedroom._

  
While her ballet abilities wouldn't be very useful in this new world, Codsworth was right about staying active. Besides, she was already starting to feel like the day would be incomplete without her barre exercise. She had never missed a day, even when she was pregnant with Shaun. She had recovered easily after she gave birth and the nurses thought she was insane for still doing them in the hospital (though perhaps not as flexible so soon after pushing a baby out). But she had hoped that she would be able to dance in the Boston Ballet again. 

When the Massachusetts government had shut down the Opera House and other theatres, she and the other dancers were forced to find other jobs. Many had gone to join the army, not knowing what else to do. Lillian went to law school, her backup plan in case ballet didn't work out. She didn't think she'd ever go to law school, having initially planned to stay with the ballet company in case an injury had forced an early retirement, but the entire company was shut down. It motivated her to work hard so she could use her new law degree to try to get the ballet company back. She was one week from starting her first job at a law office in Concord when the bombs fell. 

She wished their holotape player still worked so she could have actual music. There was a faint radio signal on the Pip-boy she took from the vault, but it was more static than anything else. She'd do anything to hear her favourite Tchaikovsky pieces again. 

"Breakfast is served!" her thoughts were interrupted by Codsworth entering with a plate of cooked pieces of meat. 

"More flies?" she asked, taking the plate.

"A nutritious way to start the day!" Codsworth said cheerfully. Lillian smiled, sat at the table and ate in silence. When she finished she placed the plate in the sink, even though there was no running water. She still hoped to figure out something. She dressed again and headed out. Codsworth was humming and trimming what little was left of the hedges in front of the house. 

"Miss Lillian, if I may, but perhaps you might consider going to Concord soon for assistance in finding young Shaun." 

"I think I'll head out tomorrow morning," she said. "Will you come with me?"

"But what about the house, mum? There will be no one here to keep the bugs out."

"Well, let's get some of these other houses prepared. In case other people need a place to stay. Surely there are still friendly people out there." 

They spent the rest of the day making basic beds and covering up the larger holes in the walls and roofs of some of the houses still standing. By the time evening rolled in, Lillian realized there wasn't enough time to make any blankets. Codsworth reassured her that the weather was still warm enough and not to worry. It was like he knew she was going to try to put off heading out on her own. 

That evening she packed her backpack, simultaneously worried and curious on what's to come. She would be able to defend herself with the pistol she took from the vault, but she wished Codsworth would come with her. But he was right that someone had to stay in Sanctuary. She needed somewhere to call home and Codsworth had kept it safe all these years. She didn't want to come back to find someone else living in her house and sleeping in her bed. And she certainly didn't want some stranger messing up Shaun's room. She had carefully repaired the crib to the best of her abilities and decorated the room with some toys she had found around the neighbourhood. 

  
_"Are you sure you don't want any help?" Granddad asked as he leaned on the doorjamb._

_"I need to do this myself," Lillian didn't look up from frowning at the instructions to set up the crib. She silently pointed at every piece, making sure they were all there, then set the paper down. She looked around and sighed._

_"Forget something?" Granddad smiled._

_"I need a screwdriver," Lillian grumbled._

_"Got one right here, Lilli-pad," he handed her a screwdriver from his pocket. "Did Nate say when he was coming home?"_

_"No, he said he's asked for leave numerous times, but hasn't received a reply yet," she said. "I just hope he gets here before the baby does. I can't do this alone."_

_"You won't be alone," he crouched down and took her hands in his, "You've got all of us here. You'll be okay. Nate will make it home."_

_Lillian smiled. "Thanks. Want to help me for a bit? I think I'm stuck down here." She patted her round belly._

_"Of course, sweetheart, anything for my favourite granddaughter and soon-to-be favourite great-grandchild."_

_"I'm your only granddaughter," Lillian laughed._

  
She picked up the small photo album Codsworth had managed to save. Most of the pictures were from a short vacation in Vermont they had taken at the beginning of September with Nate's parents, shortly after Nate's return from being stationed out west. Photo after photo of happy faces, oblivious of what's to come. She removed the photo of the three of them taken after the last dinner of the vacation. Nate was so handsome in his suit and she was wearing her favourite green dress. Shaun was happy and adorable in the tiny shirt and pants Nate's parents gave him. 

She packed the rest of the album then lay down on her bed with the photo. She inserted a holotape into the Pipboy and pressed play. She ran her fingers across the picture as she listened to Nate's voice. Codsworth had surprised her with the holotape Nate had made for her on the morning the bombs dropped. She replayed the tape until she finally fell asleep. 


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lillian meets a new four-legged friend, and some new potential neighbours for Sanctuary.

After an early breakfast of grilled radroach and deviled eggs, Lillian headed out towards Concord. Codsworth still refused to come along, assuring her that she'd be okay. She wasn't so sure. If there were gigantic bugs in Sanctuary, what else could be waiting for her out there? 

The old wooden bridge creaked as she walked across it, but it still felt strong. She'll have to try to reinforce it later. She passed a couple of rusted cars and wondered if any vehicles would still be working after all this time. Not that she'd want to drive on the road if they were all as cracked and broken as the one leaving Sanctuary. She imagined construction crews weren't too bothered with that sort of thing now. That is, if there were any out here, which she highly doubted. 

She reached the Red Rocket truck stop and decided to poke around, see if there was anything useful. A large German Shepherd dog trotted out from behind the building and barked at her. He stopped a few feet away and looked at her curiously. Lillian cautiously kneeled and stuck her hand out for the dog to smell. He sniffed it then barked again and wagged his tail. 

"Hey boy," she said as she pet him. "Are you out here on your own?" She looked around for any sign of movement. 

"Hello?" she called out. "Anyone here?" There was no reply. She turned back to the dog. "So, wanna tag along?" she asked. The dog barked excitedly. "Okay then. Do you have a name? I guess you can't tell me if you do. Hmm, Nate was always better at this."

  
_"What is that?" Lillian asked as Nate carried the puppy into the house._

_"Honey, you said you couldn't wait to hear the pitter-patter of tiny feet around the place," he grinned. "I figure this was cheaper and we get more feet."_

_Lillian shook her head and scratched the puppy behind the ears. The puppy threw its head back to sniff and lick her hand. "Does it have a name yet?"_

_"He does not," he set the puppy down to let him explore. "I wanted to confer with you to make sure we pick a name we both like."_

_"Oh god, I'm terrible at naming things."_

_"Nonsense! Didn't you have pets growing up?"_

_"I had three goldfish named Goldie, Goldie Two, and Goldie Three. I also had a cat named Fluffy."_

_"Oh god. Well, we are not naming this little guy Rover. Or Fido. Or Puppy McPuppyface."_

_"How about Tinkle?"_

_Nate snorted. "What the hell kind of name is that for a puppy?"_

_"Well that's what he's doing on your guitar," Lillian smirked and pointed at the puppy who did indeed have his leg lifted against Nate's guitar. Nate rushed over to carry the puppy outside. When he came back in, she handed him a rag._

_"Okay, how about Odin?" Nate asked as he cleaned up the puddles._

_"Odin? Like from Norse mythology?"_

_"Yeah. The big boss of all Norse gods, because no pressure on the little guy or anything."_

_"I like it. Odin it is."_

_Nate smiled and turned to the puppy who was sitting nearby. "What do you think, little guy? Do you like the name Odin?" The puppy yipped. "I think he agrees."_

  
"Hmm, well I don't think I'll call you Odin, since that was our old dog's name. How about Canigou? My great-grandpa had a dog by that name." The dog barked again. "You like that? Okay. Canigou it is." 

Canigou tilted his head at her then trotted back to the Red Rocket building. He barked at her, wanting to be followed. She did so and he led her through to the back room. There was a tin box of Nuka-Cola bottle caps on the desk beside the terminal, as well as some money still in the drawer. 

She had found a few boxes and small bags of these bottle caps throughout Sanctuary. Did people collect them now for some reason? It seemed very strange to her, but she had stored what she found in Shaun's room. He could collect them too. 

She dumped the bottle caps into her backpack along with the dollar bills. The terminal was fluttering on and off so she turned it off. How it even stayed on all this time is amazing. She started going through other drawers and cabinets, discarding old folders and brittle pieces of paper while keeping a couple of stimpaks, a bottle of Nuka-Cola, and even a can of beans. 

Canigou started to growl and crept to the door. Lillian immediately pulled out her pistol and crouched, following him. She listened and heard what sounded like a large animal trying to breathe through a stuffed nose. What the hell was it? Canigou stalked out the door before she could stop him. 

A moment later she heard the dog bark and something else growl. She dashed out and saw him fighting - something. It was huge, nearly the same size as Canigou. A giant rodent? A mole? Before she could think any further, another giant rodent burst out of the ground and ran towards her. She fired two shots before it dropped dead. Canigou had killed the other one. A third one burst out of the ground ten feet away which Lillian managed to shoot dead. A fourth and fifth ran out from around the corner. A few shots and some mauling by Canigou killed them. 

"Are they all gone now?" she asked Canigou. He wagged his tail which she assumed was an affirmative reply. She put away her gun, wet a clean cloth from her pocket and gently cleaned the blood off the dog's snout. He had managed to get away with only a few scratches. She looked at the dead mole.. rat... things. She took out her knife and cursed as she sliced the belly of one open. She cut out the meat and set it aside. She repeated it with the other four mole rats. If she could eat roaches and flies, she could eat... this. 

  
_"Okay, sweetheart, you want to insert your knife here and slice to about here."_

_"Ew, Granddad, this is so gross!" Lillian was twelve the first time she went hunting with her granddad, much to her parents' chagrin. But she had insisted and whatever their daughter wanted, their daughter got._

_"You're the one who wanted to hunt," Granddad looked down at her, "This is part of hunting. We don't hunt for the sake of shooting things. We hunt because we need to eat."_

_"That's what supermarkets are for, duh," Lillian rolled her eyes._

_"And where do you think supermarkets get their meat?"_

_"Farms?"_

_"That too, but for wild boars like this one, they're hunted," Granddad kneeled beside her, "Now give it a try."_

_Lillian hesitated then inserted the knife into the belly of the dead boar and made a jagged cut along its belly._

_"Eurgh," she wrinkled her nose._

_"Good job, sweetie!" Granddad squeezed her shoulder. "Now I'll show you how to cut out the bits we can eat and we can cook them."_

  
She cooked up the meat behind the Red Rocket, not daring to take a chance of lighting a fire near the nuclear coolant pumps. She tried a bit of the cooked molerat, which was a bit chewy but at least it was edible. She gave some to Canigou who happily ate it. She wrapped the rest of the cooked meat in a worn curtain and stuffed in her backpack. 

"Well, let's get going," she said to the dog, "We've got a baby to find and an asshole to murder." 

A short bit later Canigou ran ahead barking. Lillian watched two enormous mosquitoes rise up from the corpse of a dead animal and flew away. Canigou chased after them until they were deep in the woods. 

Jesus christ, she thought, are all of the bugs and insects huge now? What about spiders? What kind of monstrosities did those mutate into? She never liked spiders. She wasn't quite arachnophobic, but she just didn't like being in the same room as a spider. Nate had always moved them outside, jokingly telling them to go play in the neighbour's yard.

They continued on past the carcass and finally reached Concord. She heard gunfire from the main street, so she crept along the side of the buildings and peeked around for a look. The gunfight seemed to be between some people in the street and someone on the balcony of the museum. From where she was, she couldn't tell who she should help if at all. 

"Come on, boy," she whispered to Canigou, "Let's go around." They quickly and quietly made their way around the town. She felt safer once she couldn't hear any more gunfire, but kept her hand on her holstered pistol in any case. As they continued - she decided to try Lexington next - Canigou was exploring the areas just off the road, sniffing for whatever dogs sniff for, but never straying too far. It was eerily peaceful. 

She wondered if she could ever really get used to it. The lack of noise. No cars and trucks on the road, no airplanes in the sky. And not just the silence, but having to walk everywhere. She's always been in excellent shape, having been a professional ballerina, so exercise didn't bother her. It's just having it take so long to get places. 

Lillian sighed as they passed another rusted car. Canigou looked at her curiously. She smiled and scratched him behind the ear. 

"It's okay, boy, just remembering the old days." 

The sky was getting darker as they walked closer to Lexington so she started looking for shelter. At first she noticed the train cars and wondered if that would be safe. But the house she spotted off the road looked far more appealing. They approached cautiously when they heard voices. 

"If I see any more radroaches, I'm going to stomp them flat!" a young girl said. 

"Ha, I bet you will," a man replied wearily. 

"Um, hello?" Lillian called out. She heard shuffling in the house. 

"Who's there?" the man demanded from behind the closed door. 

"My name is Lillian. I mean no harm, I'm just looking for somewhere to spend the night."

The door cracked opened. A moment later a man stepped through, his shotgun aimed at her. His eyes narrowed as he looked her and Canigou over. Lillian held up both of her hands, showing she had no intention of being hostile. 

"Oh! She has a dog!" the young girl had appeared in the window. 

"Charlie! Get back!" the man said sternly, not taking his eyes off Lillian. The girl crouched out of sight, but Lillian saw her peeking around the door a moment later. 

"I'm not having strangers here," he growled, "so you'll have to find somewhere else." 

"I understand sir. But if you let me stay here I can share some food and water, and help keep watch." Then she added, "And your daughter can play with my dog." 

"I can?" the girl jumped out gleefully. 

The man sighed, knowing he wasn't going to win this one. "Fine. You don't look like them raiders. But be warned, one wrong move and I won't hesitate to put a bullet in you."

Lillian nodded and followed them into the house. Perhaps it was a bit dirty to use the girl's adoration of Canigou against her father, but at least it got her shelter. And she wasn't lying about sharing her food and water. The girl ran up to Canigou who sat down and relished the new attention. 

"Your dog is so nice! What's his name? I bet he keeps all the bad things away. Can we get a dog, Dad?"

The man sighed, rubbing his eyes. "Yeah, we'll get one. One day." 

Lillian took out the cooked molerat and passed it around. The man was taking small bites, while Charlie wolfed down most of hers then gave the rest to Canigou. 

"Sorry, didn't introduce ourselves. I'm Clinton, this is my daughter Charlie."

"Nice to meet you. Is it just you two?" 

"Yeah. Her mother passed a while back." 

"I'm sorry to hear that." 

"Yeah." He chewed his food slowly. "What about you? Lillian, you said your name was?"

She nodded. "My husband was killed and my baby boy was kidnapped. I'm trying to find him." 

"Well, we haven't seen any babies lately. Sorry you have to go through that." 

They both watched as Charlie threw bits of wood across the room for Canigou to fetch. Lillian smiled at how happy the young girl was, like all her troubles were the last thing on her mind. 

"So is this your place?" she asked Clinton. 

"Nah, just another roof over our head until the next one. Never know when raiders will hit." That was the second time he mentioned raiders. Whoever these raiders were, they sure sounded like trouble. 

"Do you want a more permanent place to live?" 

"I don't have money to buy into one of those big settlements," he said sadly. "Thought maybe Diamond City would let us in because Charlie's so young, but nope. Gotta have caps." 

"Caps? You mean bottle caps?" Lillian took out the small tin of caps she had taken from the Red Rocket. 

"Yeah," Clinton looked confused. "You new around here?"

"Sort of. Long story. So people use these as money?"

"Yeah, you need 'em if you want to buy anything."

"Huh." She put the tin back in her bag. "Well, you don't need to pay for anything. Only a bit of work, if you're up for it." 

"What kind of work?" his eyes narrowed. "I ain't guarding caravans and leaving Charlie behind." 

"No, nothing like that. Just some farming, general maintenance, that sort of thing. You never have to leave your daughter."

"Okay, I'm listening. And where is this dreamland?"

"Sanctuary Hills. North of Concord. There's a Mr. Handy there named Codsworth right now. And a bunch of houses we fixed up. Not perfect, but it'll keep the rain off you. Pick any house you like. Except mine, which is the blue one in the middle." 

Clinton was silent, thinking it over. Charlie had clearly been listening because she piped up. 

"You're giving us a house? With a door and a roof and everything?"

"There's no one else there at the moment," said Lillian with a smile, "I wouldn't mind some friendly neighbours when I get back."

"And that robot of yours won't attack?" asked Clinton. 

"Nah, he's good. His programming might be a bit wonky these days, but he won't attack unless you attack him." 

"Wouldn't dream of it." he turned to Charlie. "So what do you think, kiddo?" 

"Oh yes! Can we go tomorrow? Do I get my own room?"

"Of course," he smiled and turned back to Lillian. "Thank you. To think, I was this close from shooting you earlier."

"I'm glad you didn't." 

They chatted for a bit longer before falling asleep. Lillian was happy she could help someone out. No child should have to live in fear. It made her more determined to find Shaun. 

  
_"How could you?"_

_"Nate, I didn't mean to!"_

_"You just let them take Shaun! I thought you loved him!"_

_"Of course I love him! I couldn't stop them!"_

_"I tried to stop them and I was shot dead! You didn't do anything!"_

_"I COULDN'T!"_

_"Maybe you didn't love us as much as I thought you did."_

_"Nate, please..."_

_"Goodbye, Lillian."_

  
Lillian woke with a start, her brow covered in sweat. She wanted to cry, she wanted to go back to Sanctuary, she wanted to go home. But she had to find Shaun. She had to prove to Nate that she still loves him and Shaun. 

Canigou laid his head in her lap. She pet him reassuringly and got up. She tiptoed past the sleeping forms of Clinton and Charlie and out the door. She looked up at the sky which was overcast and took some deep breaths to keep herself from sobbing. 

It was just a nightmare. Nate would never be angry at her for not being able to stop those people from taking their son. Of course he wouldn't. But it seemed so real. She sat on the steps and watched the sun rise. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Fun fact - Canigou is Dogmeat's name in the French version! 
> 
> Nate's joke about getting a dog because it's cheaper and you get more feet is from a joke by Rita Rudner.
> 
> And yes, she totally bypassed Concord and rescuing Preston and Co. because why would she get herself into a gunfight when she has no combat experience? But maybe someone else will rescue them. Stay tuned.


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Time to rescue some Brotherhood of Steel soldiers! Paladin Danse falls hard for Lillian without realising it.

Early the next morning, after a breakfast of reheated molerat with a side of beans, Lillian and Canigou parted ways with Clinton and Charlie. She promised Charlie if she found one, she'd bring back another dog just for her. 

Lillian and Canigou headed to Lexington. She thought of checking out the supermarket, but figured it would probably be picked clean by now. As they got closer, Canigou stopped and growled. Lillian immediately crouched beside him. 

"What is it, boy?" she whispered as she took out her pistol. 

There was a sudden explosion from the center of town followed by rapid gunfire. Lillian quickly hid behind a car, followed by Canigou. She took out her binoculars and peered out. At first she couldn't see anything apart from smoke, but then something moving caught her eye. A few figures running, but they didn't seem to run like humans normally do. They disappeared behind some buildings and there was more gunfire. She put the binoculars away. 

"Shit, well, I guess we're skipping this one too," she said quietly. Canigou snorted in response. They crept toward the outer fence of the Corvega factory, intending to walk along it back to the road. A shot rang out and a bullet hit the ground only a foot away. Lillian didn't look to see where it had come from and ran towards some trees. She could hear someone yell from the roof. 

"Fuck! Missed!" 

Why the hell were they shooting at her? She hadn't done anything. Maybe they had taken over this area, claimed it as theirs and figured she was trespassing. But surely they could've just yelled at her to get off their lawn or something. 

She carefully took out her binoculars and peeked around the tree trunk. She couldn't see anyone at the bottom of the factory, but spotted a couple of people on the roof. One seemed to be looking for her through a sniper rifle. She quickly hid again and pulled Canigou close. 

"We'll wait them out," she said, "You let me know if anyone is getting near." 

She sat against the tree trunk, her pistol in hand, and listened. She could hear some distant gunfire, but nothing too close. Canigou's ears were perked and stiff, listening for any sound. They waited an hour before moving. Lillian waved a scarf to the side but there were no shots towards them. They cautiously made their way back to the road, with Lillian keeping a close eye on the roof of the factory. She couldn't see any more movement. 

They were well past Lexington and Lillian was about to finally relax a bit when her Pipboy made an alerting beep. She looked down. A new radio signal? She tuned in to listen. 

"... message repeating. This is Scribe Haylen of Reconnaissance Squad Gladius to any unit in transmission range. Authorization Arx. Ferrum. Nine. Five. Our unit has sustained casualties and we're running low on supplies. Requesting support or evac from our position at Cambridge Police Station. Automated message repeating.... This is --" 

She turned it off. Rain started to fall. Poor souls. Probably a cry for help from long ago and never got the chance to turn off the broadcast. It sounded like the army, but she never heard of anyone with the rank of Scribe. Maybe it was just after the bombs dropped. From what she's seen so far, the army probably didn't exist any more. But it did give her the idea to check out the police station. It wasn't too far. 

The rain was now pouring and she pulled her hood up. At the very least she could take shelter at the police station. She could feel safe there. She then mentally kicked herself. If the army wasn't around any more, then neither were the police. There was no one there to keep her safe. But still, she wanted to see for herself. She'd just need to be careful. 

As they neared the back of the police station from the back, the sounds of shouting and laser guns filled the air. They seemed to be coming from directly in front of the police station. Lillian paused, took out her pistol, and crept along the fence. Inhuman growls now added to the noise. All of her instincts told her to run but something told her to stay. She could hear the shouting more clearly as she got closer to the front. 

"Fuck, it's jammed!" 

"Keane, behind you!" 

"AARRRGGHHHH!" 

"Keane! No! Shit!" 

"Watch out, more on the right!" 

"There's too many of them!" 

Lillian peeked through a hole in the fence and saw a man in power armour firing his laser gun at... people? No, they were all withered and deformed. Whatever they were, they were attacking ferociously. Four of the things had swarmed the man in power armour, knocking him off balance. Lillian kicked open the gate and started firing. Canigou leapt on one of the things, dragging it off the man. 

"Check your fire, civilian in the perimeter!" the man shouted as he stood up and fired at more coming through the front entry. Canigou had killed the first one and attacked another. Lillian kept firing, almost surprised with how calm she was. She'd only shot paper targets before the bombs dropped and giant bugs since leaving the vault. 

Another wave of these horrible things ran in through another entry way. Canigou made quick work of many of them, mauling them to death. Clearly he had met these things before. The man in power armour disintegrated many others with his laser gun while Lillian shot a few more. Then finally it was over. 

"Is that all of them?" a woman near the front of the police station asked. Lillian checked out the gate she had kicked open while the man in power armour looked out the main entry. There was no more sign of movement so she closed the gate. The man confirmed that it was clear. Lillian stared down at the dead bodies. They looked human, but what WERE they? 

"Haylen, report," the man in power armour demanded. 

"Rhys has superficial wounds, but he'll live. I only have a few scratches." the woman replied. 

"Good." the man turned to Lillian, but she was staring down at the carnage. "Thanks for the assistance, civilian, but what's your business here?" 

There was a pause before Lillian spoke. 

"What the fuck are those things?" 

"You've never seen ghouls before?" the man raised his eyebrows. 

"Ghouls? What are those?" She finally looked at him. 

"Ghouls are irradiated people," he explained, his brow furrowing, "The radiation has destroyed most of their brain and being. They're feral and savage." 

Lillian's eyes widened. "These were human? Like us?"

"They were but not any more," the man said. "It's our duty to destroy them." 

"Oh. Well, I guess that's more humane." She looked down at the dead ghouls sadly. These used to be people. Actual people. Is this what happened to those who didn't make it inside the vaults? How long were they like this? Who were they before they became ghouls?

"Ahem," the man cleared his throat. 

"Sorry, it's just - I didn't know it was like this."

"Are you from a vault?" he asked.

"Yes. And no. It's a long story." 

"What brings you here?" 

"Looking for shelter, supplies, and help." 

The man narrowed his eyes. He wasn't sure if this was some sort of trick. She did help them out. And now with another man down, they could use all the help they could get. 

"We can offer shelter as thanks for your assistance, but we're running low on supplies ourselves."

"Okay, that'll suit me. But who are you?"

"I'm Paladin Danse of the Brotherhood of Steel, and that's Scribe Haylen and Knight Rhys. We're on recon from the Capital Wasteland." 

"Sir, perhaps we could continue this inside, out of the rain," said Haylen.

"Of course," Paladin Danse agreed. "I'll take care of this mess out here and you tend to your and Rhys's wounds. And you," he turned to Lillian, "find yourself a place to sleep, but be warned. We won't tolerate any level of hostility or misbehaviour." 

"Understood." She thought she saw a faint smile on his face as he turned around. She went up the stairs to the front door as Haylen and Rhys were going in. Lillian turned back and saw Paladin Danse heading up the walkway above the main entry. He tossed the body of a ghoul over the side and she saw the body of their fourth member. She turned away and went inside. 

The police station was in disarray. The main lobby had tables and sleeping bags set up and a terminal in the corner. A room to the left was a mess of debris and desks. She picked her way through the room to a hallway. There was an interrogation room that was full of dirt. But she opted to drop her backpack in the lockup. She placed her hand on one of the cell door locks. It was the perfect height. 

She heard heavy footsteps in the hallway that stopped just outside the door. She turned as she removed her hood, running her fingers through her vibrant red hair, damp from the rain. 

"If it's okay with you, I'll stay in here," she said.

Paladin Danse stared at her for a moment then spoke. "That's fine. Is there anything you need?" 

"Don't suppose there's a working shower here, huh?" she said, only half-joking. 

"Hmf, I wish," he said. "I'm afraid you'll have to make do without." 

"Okay. I'm just going to change into dry clothes." She turned, took her jacket off and draped it over a nearby chair. She was about to remove her shirt when she realised she hadn't heard any footsteps walking away. She turned back to see Danse still in the doorway. "Sorry, do I need supervision to get naked?"

"Hm? No, of course not." She could practically hear him blushing. "Just... don't walk around here in a state of undress." He left to the lobby. 

She smiled to herself, removed her shirt and draped it on the dusty desk. Ugh, she'd have to give it all a proper wash later. She dug into her backpack and took out a pair of shorts and a tank top which she changed into. She changed into clean, dry socks then had a proper look around. It was so dusty. She found a broom in a supply closet and started sweeping up. 

"At least someone's trying to clean this place." Lillian turned and saw Haylen in the doorway holding a clipboard. 

"Seems like the whole world is a mess now," Lillian replied.

"Paladin Danse is going to ask for your help with an important task, but I need to get some information from you first." 

"What kind of task?"

"He'll explain when we're finished here," Haylen entered the room, stopping at the desk. "And this is for our records, if you don't mind. So first off, your full name please." 

"Lillian Frances Parker." 

"Date of birth?"

"May 5, 2052." 

Haylen raised her eyebrows. "Don't you mean 2252?"

"No. I was born in 2052. Before the bombs dropped. We were cryogenically frozen in Vault 111." 

Haylen stared at her. "What? Are you serious? Hold on, vault 111? I'm not sure we have a record of that one." 

"It's just outside Sanctuary Hills. My home." 

"But... hold on." She dropped her clipboard on the desk and rushed out. She returned a few moments later with Paladin Danse who was still in his power armour. "Tell him what you just told me." 

Lillian did so. Danse's eyes widened then his brow furrowed again. 

"So no wonder -- How many came out of the Vault with you?" he asked.

Lillian bit her lip. "Everyone else is dead. Except me. And my baby. But someone took him. Someone took Shaun and shot my husband dead while doing it." 

"I'm sorry to hear that," Haylen said gently. 

"That's why I'm here, I need to find my son. I need to bring him home." 

Haylen and Danse looked at each other. They knew trying to find a missing infant was near impossible. If he had even survived. 

"When did you leave the vault?" asked Haylen. 

"Five, no, six days ago."

They stood in silence for a few moments before Danse spoke. 

"I'll leave you to the rest of your examination, Haylen." 

"So I guess I can skip the next of kin information," Haylen said when they were alone again. "What was your job before?"

"Well, I was about to start my new job in a law office. But before that I was a ballet dancer." 

"A dancer, huh? I think I've seen references to ballet in some books. Not much use for that these days." 

Haylen continued to ask Lillian questions regarding her health, though she was desperate to ask her more detailed questions about life before the bombs dropped. It was a Scribe's dream come true. An honest to goodness pre-war human who was not a ghoul. But she knew it would have to wait until after Paladin Danse spoke with her. 

When they had finished they went into the lobby where Danse, still in his power armour, and Rhys, bandaged up and eating a tin of Cram, were waiting. 

"Couldn't be bothered to get dressed?" Rhys scowled at her.

"Couldn't be bothered to say hello?" Lillian snapped back. Haylen hid a smile. Oh, she liked this new girl. 

"Alright, enough." Danse said sternly. He turned to Lillian. "So we've been trying to get in contact with HQ back in the Capital Wasteland, but our radio signal isn't strong enough. We need to get a long range transmitter and the only place to get one is located at ArcJet Systems. That's where you come in. I'd like you to accompany me to ArcJet so we can retrieve the transmitter. I'd rather not leave any of my team, including myself, alone so we need the extra gun." 

"I'll be glad to help. Should we go now, or wait until morning?" said Lillian. 

"I think morning will be best," replied Danse. "I have some other duties to attend to tonight."

Lillian went back to the lockup and finished sweeping up. She draped her damp sleeping bag on some overturned jail cots then returned to the lobby. Rhys was now lying in one of the sleeping bags there while Haylen was typing on the terminal. 

"Is there anything I can do?" Lillian asked. 

"I think you've helped out enough for one day," replied Haylen. "Even if the other guys don't say anything, we appreciate it."

Outside behind the police station, once he was sure it was clear, Paladin Danse exited his power armour and reached for the shovel. He was angry to have to use it again. Another man gone. Damn it. Would they even be able to survive until backup arrived? He furiously started digging. He was sore and tired and just wanted this damn mission to be over. He didn't know what he would do if he lost another member of his team. No, he can't think about that right now. He needed to focus. But how could he focus on anything when someone was watching him?

He stopped digging and looked up. Lillian was standing beside his empty power armour suit, still in her shorts and tank top. Her arms were crossed, trying to keep herself warm from the cold. He noticed how slim she was, but very toned. 

"Hi, can I help?" she asked. 

"No, I have everything under control." He continued digging. 

"Wouldn't it be easier to do that with the power armour?" 

"Yes, but it's better this way," he replied. He noticed her walking towards him out of the corner of his eye and he stopped. She walked around him to the other three graves, each marked with a makeshift cross, and read each name.

"This is the fourth loss we've had," he explained. "You can see why we're desperate for assistance." 

"I'm sorry," she said. 

"They knew the risks of coming out here, it's just.. I didn't think we'd lose anyone." 

"How did they die?" 

"Raiders. Super mutants." he angrily started digging again. Lillian was silent then stepped away from the graves. Danse dug deeper into the ground and assumed that she had gone back inside. The rain had stopped but it was pretty cold out here. Even he was feeling chilly through his power armour uniform. When he had dug deep enough, he climbed out. He saw Lillian approaching the other graves again but now she had a small bunch of flowers in her hand. She placed a few on each of the graves.

"What are you doing?" he asked. 

"Putting flowers on their graves," she replied. "Do people not do this any more?"

"People are lucky to even get buried when they die, let alone have flowers placed on their graves." 

"Oh. Well, I hope you don't mind. It just seems like the right thing to do." 

Danse didn't reply but nodded, picked up Keane's body and placed it in the grave. He covered it up and hammered in another makeshift cross. Lillian placed the rest of the flowers at the base of it then stood next to Danse. 

"I'm going back inside, I'll see you later." She put her hand on his arm reassuringly and left. Danse felt a warm feeling rush through him when she touched him. 

_He grabbed her hand and pulled her in, kissing her. She kissed him back, throwing her arms around his neck._

Danse felt a sharp pain in his head and snapped out of his daydream. What was that about? He hadn't had those type of thoughts in a very long time. Maybe he's just working too hard. He stayed outside for a short bit longer before going in to repair his power armour in the motorpool. 

He was hot after digging the grave so he took his hood cap off. He ran his hand through his hair and got to work. But he was distracted. This new girl, there was something about her. Not just her being pre-war, but... something. It was the way she paid her respects to his fallen brothers, even though she didn't know them. The way she wasn't bothered by Rhys's grouchiness. The way she looked in those shorts. Now he knew what they meant by the phrase 'legs for days'.

He felt himself blushing again. He had no time to think such thoughts, especially of someone he just met. Especially of someone who was married. Well, widowed, he supposed. But still. He had to consider more important things like getting that transmitter. He almost regretted asking her to come along, but he had no choice. While Rhys or Haylen would be more ideal, he just couldn't risk it. But he didn't want to risk Lillian's life either. 

Finally finishing up on his power armour, Danse went upstairs to grab something to drink. Rhys should be on patrol tonight. As he neared the top of the stairs he could hear humming from the lock up. He looked in and saw Lillian standing next to the jail cell, holding the cell door with one hand while the other was up in the air. She was balancing on the ball of her left foot while her right leg was stretched straight out behind her. Her eyes were closed and she was humming a tune he didn't recognize. She slowly brought her leg down then turned and repeated the same pose with the left leg raised. It was beautiful.

"Hello." 

Danse jumped. Somehow she knew he was there. He felt his face flush up again as she turned to him, her eyes open now. 

"Sorry, I mean, hi," he stammered. What was wrong with him? This is ridiculous. Get a grip. "How did you know I was here?"

"Canigou," she pointed at her dog who he just now noticed was now sitting right up to her leg.

"Oh. He's very protective, isn't he?"

"Seems to be. I've only known him for a couple days, but so far no trouble." She scratched Canigou behind the ears. 

"Anyway, I'll leave you to it. I'll see you in the morning." 

"Good night, Paladin Danse." 

Lillian watched Danse turn and leave. He seemed sweet in his own way, distracted, but very much a soldier. Despite her dislike of the army and anyone who's similar to the army, she figured this group might be the best bet so far to find her son. She'll help them get their transmitter, they can bring in reinforcements, and maybe then they can help her. She just needed to be patient. 


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lillian and Paladin Danse go retrieve a long range transmitter.

Lillian woke up early the next morning. She stretched and did her morning exercises before getting dressed. She had a breakfast of molerat meat, then brought out the rest of it to the lobby. 

"Good morning," she greeted Rhys who was sitting at the table drinking a Nuka Cola. 

"Paladin Danse is waiting for you outside," he grumbled. 

"I'm fine, thanks," she said sarcastically as she dropped the meat on the table. "Sorry, I couldn't hear you there. Oh, you're welcome for some extra food that doesn't come in a tin." If he wasn't going to be nice to her, why should she be nice back. Rhys scowled, but pulled the food towards him. 

Lillian and Canigou went outside to see Paladin Danse checking over the front entryway. Once he was satisfied everything was clear, he turned and greeted the two.

"Ready to get going?" 

"As ready as I'll ever be," said Lillian. 

"It might be best for the dog to stay here," he said. 

"Why? He's good in a fight. You saw him yesterday." 

"I know, but I don't want him getting in the way or getting hurt." 

"Fine," Lillian sighed. She turned to Canigou. "You stay here. I'll be back." Canigou whimpered, but sat down obediently. "Okay, let's go." 

"Right, follow me." 

They left out the side gate and down the road to the west. On the way Danse told her about the strange signals they kept receiving. They were significant enough to investigate further, but they needed more people. He also told her that they weren't the first recon squad out to the Commonwealth. Others have been before, including one that had gone missing. But his was the first to discover these signals. Lillian was trying to understand what sort of signals required investigating, but Danse could only tell her that they were extremely brief and they barely knew themselves. 

Danse slowed to a stop a short way down the road. He suddenly realised that they had been jogging at a good pace since the police station and while he was in power armour which didn't take much physical effort, she wasn't. He was surprised to see that she hadn't even broken a sweat. 

"Why are we stopping?" she asked.

"I thought you could use a breather," he said. 

"We've barely gone a mile," she replied. "I'm fine, it's good to be out for a run again." 

They continued down the road until Danse stopped again. 

"Hold up," he said, raising his laser rifle, "Raiders." Lillian looked and saw a woman in a jean jacket talking to three rough-looking men. Two others were standing to the side of the woman. Suddenly there was gunfire and the woman fell to the ground, dead. Danse immediately stood between the raiders and Lillian, firing his rifle until they lay dead. The caravan guards managed to escape with their lives. 

"Fuck, guess we're out of a job now," one said. "Come on, let's go back to Bunker Hill, tell Kesler what happened." 

Danse checked the dead bodies and retrieved a few things from them, though Lillian couldn't see what. He was about to continue on when she interrupted. 

"Hold on, we're just going to leave these bodies here?"

"We have more important matters to attend to," he replied sternly. 

"Yes, but --" 

"We don't have time." 

"Okay." 

Lillian followed him silently. She felt a sadness within her that these people were dead and now no one will care. What if they had family waiting for them? Regardless of whether they're a raider or not, surely someone will miss them and will want to find out what happened to them. Neither Danse nor Lillian said another word until they reached the ArcJet Systems building. 

"Okay, listen up," said Danse as they reached the front door. "We do this clean and quiet. No heroics and by the book. Understood?" 

"Understood." 

"Outstanding. Just stay focused and check your fire. I don't want to get hit by any stray bullets." 

They enter ArcJet and discover it's a mess. Walls are partially destroyed and ceilings were caving in. Lillian wondered how on earth they were going to find a transmitter in all this. But Danse seemed to know where to go as he confidently headed down the hall. 

"It's corporations like this that put the last nail in the coffin for humanity," he said. "They exploited technology for their own gains, pocketing the cash, and ignoring the damage they've done." 

"Maybe not the last nail," said Lillian, "Humanity is still around, if a bit wounded now." 

"It might not have happened if people didn't abuse technology."

"Says the man in power armour looking for a long range transmitter who is also in charge of a group looking for and investigating technology."

"That's different." 

"If you say so." Lillian could tell she hit a nerve.

Danse remained silent. He had to exert his authority, but at the same time he didn't want to offend her. He wanted her to stay.

"Looks like the facility's automated security's already been dealt with," he said as they entered a room of destroyed protectrons. "Damn it, I was hoping to avoid this." 

"This wasn't the Brotherhood's doing?"

"No, these robots were assaulted by Institute synths." 

"Synths? Aren't those the same as robots?" 

"They're an abuse of technology created by the Institute. Meant to 'improve' humanity. They simply cannot be allowed to exist." 

"What's the Institute?"

"They're a group of scientists who went underground when the bombs dropped. They've spent the last few decades littering the Commonwealth with their technological nightmares." Danse headed down the hall. "Come on, this way."

They continued through the hallways, repeatedly needing to turn around when they reached a dead end caused by fallen ceilings and debris. Danse continued to comment about humanity's abuse of technology and how the Brotherhood was doing humanity a favour by seizing all forms of tech, which Lillian just ignored. They came to a large room with a locked door. 

"See if you can find a way to get that door open," said Danse, "I'm going to reconnoiter the area. One of the terminals should open it." 

"Gosh, I don't know if I can be trusted with all this technology," Lillian said quietly to herself.

"Hm?"

"Nothing." Lillian tried one of the terminals but found it locked behind a password. She tried to log in.

"Any luck?" asked Danse. 

"Not yet. Any ideas what the password could be?"

"No." 

"Thanks. So helpful." Lillian tried another terminal which happened to be unlocked and with a message on it giving an updated password. She memorized it and tried it in the locked terminal. "Aha! That worked!" She selected the command to open the door. 

"Nice work, let's get mov--" Danse was interrupted by laser fire. Skeletal robots barged through the door and were firing at them. Lillian grabbed her pistol to shoot, but Danse kept stepping in front of her. She couldn't risk accidentally shooting him, so she dashed to the side but he managed to get in between her and the robots again. What the hell was he doing? 

"Damn synths have compromised most of the facility," he said once he'd killed them all. 

"So these are synths, huh?" she knelt down by one of the bodies. "Creepy." 

"We need to get to the engine core fast," Danse said as he dashed through the door. Lillian followed. They came across a couple more synths in the next room, but Danse quickly brought them down. After going through a maze of more halls, rooms, and stairs, they finally reached the engine core room. 

It was huge. It had to be with the test rocket firing system they had in the middle of it. The stairs going up were destroyed. Danse noted that the elevators weren't powered up so the only option was to go down. 

"There has to be a power backup system somewhere," said Danse as they reached the bottom. " Scout the maintenance area off the main chamber. I'll remain here and watch our backs." 

Lillian nodded and took out her pistol. The hallway was clear. She was both relieved and disappointed. She wanted a chance to prove herself against these synths, but she was also scared. She found another terminal in the back which had a prompt for starting up the backup power. Almost as soon as she started up, she heard laser gunfire from the engine core room. 

She ran back into the observation room just as Danse threw some debris at the door closure button, shutting her in. Synths seemed to be dropping out of the sky and attacking him. Lillian tried opening the door but it wouldn't budge. She went back to the window, feeling helpless as the synths were swarming Danse. 

"Push a button! Do something! Anything!" he shouted. Lillian looked down and saw the big red button. Who could resist? She punched it hard and she felt a rumble followed by an announcement. 

"Engine core power restored." 

Shit. What did she just do? 

"Thermal engine fueled, primed, and standing by for your command." 

Shit. 

"Command accepted. Commencing five second countdown." 

Oh shit. She hit the button again, hoping to cancel the command but nothing happened. 

"5....."

The synths kept coming. Danse was fighting valiantly, but he wasn't totally invincible. 

"4...." 

Shit, shit, shit. 

"3...."

"I can't stop it!" she shouted, banging on the window. 

"2...." 

"It's okay!" she heard him shout back. 

"1...." 

No, please no. 

"Engine firing."

The engine fired up. Lillian had to shield her eyes from the bright light. There's no way anyone could survive being in there. What the hell was she supposed to tell Haylen and Rhys back at the police station? She'll have to find that damn transmitter herself. Then they might not kill her. But what does a long range transmitter even look like? 

"Test firing completed with an efficiency of 96.7 percent." 

She heard the doors unlatch and she reluctantly looked out the window. There was only ash where the synths used to be. But in the middle of it all was Danse, kneeling on the ground but moving. Lillian ran out to him. 

"Oh my god, are you alright?" The room was so hot she could feel the heat through her boots. 

"Got... cooked by those flames," he replied slowly. "But thanks to my power armour, I'm still in one piece." 

"Thank god." Lillian was so relieved. 

"The important thing is we're still alive and now we have a way to get to the transmitter." 

"How? The stairs are destroyed." 

"Elevator." He slowly walked to the elevator. She stayed where she was. 

"The elevator? Really?" 

"Is there a problem?"

"Sorry, but we're trusting a 200 year old elevator which hasn't been serviced in the same amount of time?"

"We don't have a choice." 

"Fuck," she said to herself and followed Danse into the elevator. He pressed the button to go up and the doors shut. She balled her hands into fists and closed her eyes. She hated elevators. She was relieved when the doors opened again at the top floor. Danse stepped out cautiously with Lillian right behind. 

"They're in the control room, open fire!" He ran into the control room, firing at everything that moved. Lillian looked around the corner, pistol in hand, but not bothering to aim at anything. A few moments later everything went quiet. 

"Damn it, I don't see the transmitter anywhere," said Danse as he turned over one of the synth bodies. "Check the synth remains, they might have been after it as well." 

Lillian checked a couple of the dead synths before she found what looked like a transmitter. She held it up for Danse to see. 

"Is this it?" 

"Yes, excellent, let's get out of here." He led her to another elevator at the end of the room. 

"Another elevator?" Lillian hesitated. 

"It'll be fine." Danse stepped in and waited for her. She balled her hands into fists again and followed. Danse glanced over at her as the elevator rose. She had her eyes closed and was mumbling to herself. When the elevator stopped and the doors opened, she rushed out in relief. Danse led them outside once he was certain everything was clear. 

"Well, that could've gone smoother," he turned to her, "but mission accomplished." 

"Might've gone smoother if you let me do something," Lillian said. 

"You did fine," he removed his power armour helmet. "Without your assistance, the whole mission would have been in jeopardy."

"What assistance? You mean pushing a button?" 

"Well, you shot those --" he stopped when Lillian crossed her arms and raised her eyebrows at him. "Okay, I suppose I should have let you assist in combat. But--"

"But you weren't sure if I could actually handle myself," Lillian interrupted. 

"Regardless, I'm not sure if I could have accomplished the mission alone. So I believe we have two important matters to discuss. First and foremost if you hand me the transmitter, I'd like to compensate you for your assistance." 

"I'm getting paid for pressing a button and nearly cooking a soldier," Lillian joked. "Nice."

Danse ignored the comment. "I think you'll find this weapon useful. It's my own personal modification of the Brotherhood Laser Rifle." He handed her his laser rifle. 

"I can't accept this," said Lillian. "I don't--"

"I insist you keep it," said Danse. "I have other weapons at my disposal. Brotherhood soldiers always carry a backup." 

Lillian looked the rifle over. It felt surprisingly light. At the bottom of the grip was etched 'Paladin A. Danse'. She looked up and saw him looking at her expectantly. She smiled and said thanks. 

"As for the second matter, I think you've got what it takes to become one of us. So I'd like to offer you a place in the Brotherhood of Steel." 

"Um, I don't know," said Lillian. 

"I understand your hesitation," he said, "It's a big decision. Shall we head back to the police station? Regardless of your decision, you are free to take shelter there whenever you need it." 

They were silent on the way back. Lillian was deep in thought, contemplating the proposal. She'd always had a dislike for the army, especially since they took over the Opera House. She made an exception for Nate, but that was under different circumstances. But if she joined the Brotherhood, maybe she'd have a better chance at finding her son. She supposed that would depend on whether they sent reinforcements in, or just send in an evacuation team. What would happen to her then if she joined? Would she have to go with them and abandon her search? What would Nate have chosen?

Before she knew it they were back at the police station. 

"Um, Paladin Danse?" she turned to him. 

"Have you considered joining us?" 

"I just have one question." 

"Sure. Ask away." 

"My priority right now is to find my son. Would the Brotherhood be able to assist me in doing so?"

"While the Brotherhood have their assigned missions, we can definitely look into your situation." 

Lillian swore he looked almost regretful. But what other choice did she have at this point?

"Okay, I'll join." 

"Exactly what I wanted to hear," he smiled. "Let's go inside, I'll tell the others the good news."

As she followed him inside, she wondered if she made the right decision. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> You can seriously do the ArcJet mission without firing a single shot. Danse does all the shooting so you can do all the looting.


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lillian discovers she can't talk her way through everything. Danse has feelings and he doesn't know what to do about them.

"Are we in luck, sir?" Rhys asked enthusiastically. 

"Mission accomplished, we have the transmitter." Danse handed the transmitter to Haylen. 

"Finally some good news for a change. Good work, sir!" Lillian thought Rhys was just a little too enthusiastic. 

"I didn't do it alone," Danse looked over at Lillian. "It's time to welcome the newest recruit to the team. She shows a lot of promise, and with the proper guidance, I think she has the potential to become one of the best." 

"Thanks, I promise not to let you down," said Lillian, suddenly feeling a bit shy. Haylen smiled at her warmly while Rhys glared at her. 

"You don't need to prove anything to me," said Haylen, "Getting the transmitter is enough." 

"So you decided to stay, huh?" Rhys continued to glare. "I expected you to take your payment and run." 

"And miss your pleasant company?" 

"Rhys, that's enough," Danse said sternly, "Like it or not, you're going to have to learn to work together. And you," he turned to Lillian, "You need to understand what it means to be part of the Brotherhood. We're an army and we've dedicated our lives to uphold a strict code of ethics. If you intend to stay within our ranks, you need to obey our tenets without question."

"Understood," said Lillian. God, she hated it already.

"Outstanding." he smiled at her. "From this moment forward, I'm granting you the rank of Initiate. It's only a training rank. I'm not permitted to grant ranks higher than that."

"No problem." 

"Ad victoriam, Initiate," said Haylen.

"She doesn't even know what that means," said Rhys.

"'To Victory'," Lillian said smugly. "I know my Latin."

Rhys glared at her while Haylen grinned. 

"Now, go speak with Rhys and Haylen for your next assignment," he went back outside to do his patrol. 

Rhys had already walked away into the other room, so Lillian spoke to Haylen first. 

"Rhys still giving you a hard time?" Haylen asked. 

"Eh, I can handle it," shrugged Lillian. 

"If you can, you'd be the first," she said, "Rhys bleeds Brotherhood, it's his whole life." 

"Sounds like he has a serious case of needing to get laid." 

"Um, I don't think that would help," Haylen blushed. 

"Is there something between you two?" Lillian asked quietly. 

"I thought there was. I asked him once but he said he didn't have time for that sort of thing," Haylen said sadly. 

"Just say the word, I'll knock some sense into him," she said.

"Heh, that won't be necessary," Haylen smiled, "So ready for your first assignment?"

"I think so."

"Well we're always looking for tech and there's a record of a flux sensor at the Beantown Brewery." 

"What does it look like and whereabouts in the brewery should I look?"

"It's about the size of a book, usually with a blueish-green deck. You should be able to find it in one of the brewing machines."

"Okay, so that's just right across the river, why not do it yourself?"

"Someone's gotta keep these guys in check," joked Haylen. "But really, finding the tech has been low priority for us lately. But now that you're here, we can get things going again."

"So basically I'm the resident bloodhound. Gotcha."

"Bloodhound?" Haylen asked, confused. 

"Never mind." 

Lillian found Rhys in the other room doing pushups. He watched her approach, but pretended to ignore her. She sat down on a desk, crossed her legs and pretended to be interested in her nails. Finally he sighed and stood up. 

"Alright, out with it," he scowled, "What's your game?"

"What do you mean?" she asked. 

"You shoot a few ghouls, a few synths, and suddenly you're all buddy-buddy with Paladin Danse."

"Maybe it's because I'm not trying to kiss his ass every time I see him," she snapped. 

"You could be written up for talking back," Rhys glared at her. 

"Do you have something for me or not?"

"Yeah. If you think you got what it takes, the Commonwealth is in dire need of some cleansing," he said. 

"And what will you have me do?" 

"Go to College Square, exterminate all the ferals," he said sharply. "And don't come back until the job is done."

"Sure thing," she said, hopping off the desk and going into the lockup. Canigou was lying down on her sleeping bag. He stood up, stretched, and greeted her happily. She scratched him behind the ears and set her pack on the desk. She took out the laser rifle, ran her fingers over Danse's name on the grip, then placed it on the desk. 

"Come on, boy," she said, zipping up her pack. Canigou followed her out. 

"Are you leaving already?" Paladin Danse asked as he came back into the police station. 

"Just doing my duties," she said. 

"Oh, I didn't think you'd be doing them tonight," he said.

"I'd rather get them done sooner than later," she said, "They're not far, anyway."

"Efficient and prompt," he said, impressed, "I like it. Good luck."

"See you later."

Four hours later, night had fallen and Lillian still hadn't returned to the police station. Paladin Danse came back in from his patrol and exited his power armour in the other room.

"We cooked up some Cram," said Haylen, passing Danse a cracked bowl. "Seeing as _someone_ ate all that cooked molerat Lillian so kindly gave to us." She shot a look at Rhys who ignored her.

"Thanks, Haylen." Danse took the bowl and started eating without complaint.

"Disgusting," said Rhys, "I don't see why one of us can't do a supply run."

"We're not taking that chance," said Danse sternly. "Not yet. We nearly bought it when those ghouls attacked."

"If Lillian hadn't come along when she did..." Haylen said. 

"Alright, fine," said Rhys. "But we're running low on food, ammo, and medical supplies."

"I'm aware of the situation," said Danse.

"Sir, maybe when Lillian returns, we could send her?" Haylen asked. 

"You mean IF she comes back," Rhys scowled, "The way I see it, she's either gotten herself killed or she ran out on us."

"I don't think she ran," said Haylen, "She doesn't seem like that kind of person."

"We'll just have to trust she comes back," said Danse. He finished up his meal, got back into his power armour and headed out again for a perimeter check. 

Even though he was supposed to be making sure no enemies were nearby, he kept watching for Lillian or her dog. His stomach fluttered when he looked at the flowers she had placed on the graves on his brothers. He shouldn't have let her go on her own. But he didn't have a choice. If he did, he'd keep her safe at the police station until backup arrived. She was not a soldier, he knew that. He knew she only joined in order to find her missing child. 

"No sign of her yet?" he asked Haylen when he returned.

"No," Haylen shook her head, "It's after midnight, where is she?"

"I'm telling you she ran," said Rhys. "I knew you shouldn't have given her your laser rifle, Paladin. We could've used it here."

"Rhys--"

"She didn't take it," interrupted Haylen. 

"She didn't?" Paladin Danse was surprised.

"No, she left it in the lockup," she said. "Guess she prefers her pistol. Her sleeping bag and extra clothes are in there too."

"Fine, so I guess we'll have to go searching for what's left of her body later," said Rhys.

"Rhys, that's enough," Danse said sternly.

"If you ask me, we should've just let her go," Rhys continued, "She's not the military type. She's a loner."

Paladin Danse was about to speak when they heard the door open and closed. Canigou trotted into the room, closely followed by Lillian. She was covered in blood and filth, and carrying two heavy duffle bags. She spoke to Rhys first. 

"College Square is clear," she said monotonously before turning to Haylen. 

"The sensor is in this bag," she dropped the bags on the ground, pointing at the one on her right, "and there's more food and supplies. I'm going to bed." She turned and went into the lockup with Canigou following close behind. 

"Look at all this food!" Rhys said, opening one of the bags. "And more stimpaks and med-x!"

"I'd say she did well," said Haylen, taking out the flux sensor and looking it over. 

"That she did," said Paladin Danse proudly. But he was worried about her. She looked upset when she had returned and he didn't like seeing her that way. 

"I'll go check on her," said Haylen, heading to the lock up. She found Lillian stripped down to her underwear, furiously trying to wash the clothes she had been wearing. 

"Come on, get out!" Lillian said angrily to herself. 

"You okay?" asked Haylen from the doorway. 

"Yeah, I'm just--" Lillian stopped then started sobbing. "I killed people. They didn't even let me speak, just started shooting at me. I had to shoot back."

"You've never had to kill anyone before, have you?" Haylen knelt next to her. 

"Only those ghouls and giant bugs," Lillian sniffled. 

"It's hard, but you need to kill to survive out here."

"But... I don't understand why they wouldn't even let me talk to them," said Lillian. 

"This is the world now, I'm afraid. Shoot first, ask questions later. Or not at all. You'll have to get used to it."

"I guess so."

"Do you need anything?"

"A time machine would be good. Send me back a couple hundred years." 

"Heh, well we're just out of time machines right now," Haylen smiled at her. "I'll be in the lobby, come see me at any time if you need something." 

"Thanks, Haylen," Lillian resumed trying to wash her clothes as Haylen left. She had to get the blood out. She didn't want any reminder of having to shoot those men in the brewery. The ghouls were different. It was more of a mercy killing than murder. But it's not murder if she was merely defending herself. Manslaughter, at most. Maybe. 

Canigou nosed his head under her arm and licked her face. She stopped washing and pet him, then put her arms around him. She wished he could hug her back, or for anyone to hug her back. It would be too awkward to ask any of the others to do so, seeing as she just met them. She giggled a little through her tears as she imagined Rhys's face if she asked him for a hug.

  
"How is she?" Paladin Danse asked Haylen as she returned to the lobby. 

"Upset, but otherwise okay," she said. 

"What does she have to be upset about?" asked Rhys, "She got the job done."

"She'd never had to kill another person before," she said, "I think we can appreciate that."

"Well she better get over that if she wants to survive," said Rhys. 

Danse mentally cursed at him, but knew that he had a point. He wondered if Lillian would be able to survive without them. The Brotherhood could help protect her, but she had to do her part as well. They could help her adapt. He headed out on his nightly patrol, thinking of ways to help her adapt better. It was difficult since no one has ever been in her position, at least as far as he knew. 

There was no sign of ghouls near College Square. They had heard the gunshots earlier, but weren't sure if they were from Lillian or coming from elsewhere. Considering she had only just found out what ghouls were the day before, Danse was very impressed by how she had handled herself. Understandably, humans were going to be more difficult to deal with. He rounded the corner to go behind the police station and saw Lillian sitting against the wall, wearing only her tank top and shorts. Canigou was lying at her feet. He lifted his head and woofed quietly at Danse. Lillian looked up at him. 

"What are you doing out here?" he asked. 

"Just needed some air," she replied, looking away. 

"Are you bothered by what you had to do?"

"Wouldn't you be?" she snapped, then shrugged, "I guess you wouldn't really know, would you?"

"No, I'm afraid not," he said. "Why didn't you bring the laser rifle I gave you?"

"I don't know how to use it," she said quietly, looking down at her hands. 

"You don't? Why didn't you say so?"

"I don't know. I only know how to use a pistol and a sniper rifle."

"Did your husband teach you to shoot?"

"No, we had mandatory military training in college. Couldn't get a degree without it."

"So they only taught you to shoot pistols and rifles?"

"They were the only weapons they could use false ammunition for. The laser weapons were reserved for those in the army full time."

"Why false ammunition? Why couldn't they use real bullets?"

"To save ammo for when it was actually needed," she then smiled a bit, "And for safety reasons. That's how I met Nate, actually. I accidentally shot him in the ass."

"You shot him?" Danse's eyes widened. 

"Good thing it was just the rubber bullets," she laughed, "I mean, it still hurt him, but it would've been much worse if it had been a real bullet."

"Well, I can teach you how to use the laser rifle. If you promise not to shoot me," he added with a smile. 

"Okay," she smiled back and stood up, "Tomorrow?"

"Sure." 

She started toward the door, then turned back to him. "Does it get easier? The killing, I mean."

"When your life is on the line, you do what you need to survive," he said, "It'll become second nature to recognize danger and act accordingly."

She stayed where she was, thinking. "Thanks," she said with a small smile. She went back into the police station with Canigou following close behind. 

Danse had a strong urge to embrace her, to make everything better for her, to protect her. He didn't know why he was feeling like this. She was just another person, just another woman. Maybe it was just being stuck out in the Commonwealth for so long, with only his own squad to talk to. She was simply someone new, someone who didn't despise the Brotherhood like some wastelanders. 

He finished his patrol and headed back inside. Rhys was preparing to take the night shift while Haylen was already asleep. Danse exited his power armour in the motorpool and removed his hood as he went back upstairs. He looked into the lockup to see Lillian curled up next to Canigou, both fast asleep. He smiled to himself and went to the lobby, bidding Rhys a good night and laying down on his own sleeping bag.

He lay awake for a long time, staring up at the ceiling. When he finally fell asleep, he found himself dreaming of Lillian. 

_Danse was in the motorpool, tuning up his power armour. He heard the door open and looked up to see Lillian entering. She was still wearing her tank top and shorts. She closed the door and leaned against it._

_"Need any help?" she asked._

_"Yes," he said. She smiled and approached him. She ran her fingers up his chest to the zipper of his uniform._

_"Oh, Nate, it's been so long," she said seductively._

_"I'm not Nate," he backed away from her._

_"Of course you are," she stayed with him, unzipping his uniform, "I've missed you so much."_

_"Lilli, I'm not your husband," Danse backed away and held her hands in his. "Your husband is dead."_

_"No, he can't be dead," she said, wrenching her hands away from him._

_"Lilli..."_

_"You're lying!"_

  
Danse woke up with a start. Haylen was still sleeping and he could see it was still dark. He didn't bother going back to sleep. Instead he went downstairs, got back into his power armour, and headed outside. 

"Sir, what are you doing out here?" Rhys asked as Danse approached. 

"I'll take over for the rest of the night," he replied, "Go get some rest."

"Are you sure?"

"Yes." 

Rhys shrugged and headed back into the police station. Danse stayed on patrol for the rest of the night, even though he was still very tired. His head was hurting, but he tried to ignore it. He wasn't going to waste a med-x on it, not when the others could use it later. When dawn broke, the front door opened and Lillian came out followed by Canigou. 

"Oh, Paladin Danse, I didn't realise you'd be up this early," she said. 

"I couldn't sleep, figured I'd make myself useful," he said, watching as Canigou sniffed about. "Didn't think you'd be up this early either."

"I couldn't sleep anymore," she said, "So I figured I'd take the dog out, get some air." 

"Since you're up, do you want to learn how to use your laser rifle?"

"It won't be too loud?" 

"It'll be fine."

Lillian nodded then went back into the police station. Haylen and Rhys were still asleep. She retrieved the laser rifle along with a few fusion cells and returned outside. Danse was placing some empty cans and bottles on the barricades. 

"Lesson number one, always be aware of where you're aiming," he said as she approached, "In battle, your brothers and sisters will be around and you don't want to hit anyone with friendly fire.

"Loading and reloading is pretty straightforward. Just pop out the empty cell, pop the next one in. The mechanics are more or less the same as your pistol or a sniper rifle. Aim and pull the trigger. Even though there shouldn't be any recoil, there is because back before the war soldiers couldn't get used to it and were firing more than they should."

"Yeah, Nate told me about that," said Lillian, "They added an artificial recoil mechanism because soldiers said it didn't feel right without it. He said they were working on removing the recoil entirely, but never got around to it."

"Why not?" asked Danse. Lillian raised her eyebrow at him. "Oh. Right. Anyway, try shooting those cans."

Lillian aimed the rifle and fired. She only hit one can after using up the cell. She cursed. 

"You're too tense," said Danse, "It helps if you make sure you exhale when you fire."

"Okay." She tried again and hit all but one of the cans. "I did it!" She then aimed and fired at the bottles, hitting three out of the five. She lowered the laser rifle, grinning. 

"And you didn't even shoot anyone in the rear," said Danse.

"Shut up," she smiled up at him. His heart started beating harder when their eyes met. He was glad she couldn't hear it. 

"It just takes practice," he said, "Let's head back in. I have another task for you to look into."

"Before I do, I need to continue to search my son," Lillian said, looking down, "I know he's still out there, somewhere, and I can't just stay here."

"Of course," Danse said, "In fact, that's partially why I'm giving you this task."

They went back into the police station where Rhys and Haylen had now woken up and were having a bite to eat. 

"Feeling better today?" asked Haylen. 

"A bit, yeah," replied Lillian. 

"So as you know, we're not the first recon team out here," Danse said to Lillian, "A few years ago, Recon Squad Artemis was posted here under the command of Paladin Brandis. We lost contact with them shortly after their arrival. I want you to find out what happened to them."

"If they're even still alive," said Lillian, "It's been three years."

"They knew the risks. They were supplied with distress radio beacons. We think we got a signal from one, when we were near the airport, but it was very faint. We couldn't investigate because of injuries to our own team." 

"I don't know if I'll be going near the airport," said Lillian. 

"I know, but if you happen to find yourself over there," said Danse, "They were last recorded to be in the Malden area, so keep an eye on your Pipboy there for any distress signals. At the very least, we want to know what happened to them." 

"Sure thing," she said, then left to the lock up to pack up her things. In a way, she didn't want to leave. She felt safe here at the police station. She liked to talking to Haylen about life over two hundred years ago. And Paladin Danse was kind to her, though he seemed to blush a lot. She wasn't entirely sure if it was because of her, or if he was just always like that. But there was something about him that intrigued her. 

She headed back into the lobby and said goodbye to Haylen and Rhys. Danse had presumably gone back outside. Haylen gave her a holotape with useful notes about the Commonwealth. 

"Diamond City is across the river, but they're not very friendly to the Brotherhood," Haylen said, "Bunker Hill might be a good spot to start looking for your son. A lot of caravans pass through there, so someone might've seen something." 

"Thanks, Haylen," said Lillian. "I'll see you later."

Lillian went outside and saw Danse pacing in the yard. He stopped when he saw her. 

"Here's some extra ammo and stimpaks for you," he handed her a small box. "Stay safe out there, soldier." 

"Thanks, I will," she smiled up at him then headed out the front gate with Canigou. 

Danse went up to the walkway to watch Lillian and her dog leave. "Come back to us," he said to himself quietly. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh, Danse, you big sap. Of course she'll come back. Eventually.


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lillian hires MacCready and takes on a job for Hancock. 
> 
> This chapter ended up longer than usual because I couldn't find a good place to end. But that's not necessarily a bad thing, right?

Lillian and Canigou made their way through Cambridge to the Charles River. So far they hadn't come across anyone, or anything, else. The first bridge across the river was partially wrecked by a boat. She wasn't sure about crossing it, it didn't look very safe. Besides, Haylen had suggested going to Bunker Hill first which was on the side of the river she was already on. 

She passed the old Commonwealth Insistute of Technology campus, still mostly standing. She wondered if the Brotherhood recon teams had already pilfered everything from it. They continued on along the river when Canigou started growling.

Lillian immediately crouched behind a mailbox and carefully looked around. A huge crab-like creature emerged from the bushes. Lillian gasped. What the hell was that? The creature walked across the street, then turned around to head back to the bushes. Shit. She decided to take a detour through the side streets. At least she knew the roads. She quickly snuck around the corner and into a small alcove so she could consult Haylen's map. It marked a couple of locations along the way with 'Raiders', so Lillian decided to detour around those areas as well. 

By the time she reached Bunker Hill, dusk had fallen. A makeshift junk fence surrounded the monument, which Lillian was surprised was still standing, and the gate was wide open. An older woman with blonde hair was standing guard with a shotgun. 

"You there! Caravan or Raider?" the woman called out to her. 

"Um, I'm here on my own," said Lillian, "Just me and my dog."

"Okay, market's still open for a bit. If you need a drink or a place to sleep, go see the Savoldis around to the left," said the woman. 

"Have you seen anyone with a baby recently? Or a bald man with a scar on his face?" Lillian asked. 

"No," the woman replied, slightly confused, "Sounds like you need a detective. There's one in Diamond City."

"Thanks," said Lillian, as she passed by the woman into the small settlement. There were wooden shacks against the junk fence, along with a small garden. There was a pen with a living two-headed cow. She headed over to it. The cow looked at her with one of its heads while the other grazed. She reached out to pet it. It was so bizarre. She needed a drink so she continued on to where the bar was. 

The bartenders were arguing about a railroad or something when she approached. 

"Hey you, talk some sense into my son," the older man said to Lillian. 

"Um, about what?" she asked. 

"I'm just saying that people got to do something, Dad," said the younger man. 

"And so now you start caring about synths?" said the older man. 

"Why on earth would you care about synths?" asked Lillian, thinking back to the ones at ArcJet. 

"They have a right to live as regular people, don't they?"

"But... they're robots," said Lillian, "Creepy ones."

"No, I mean the human synths," said the young man, "The ones that look like you and me. Not the older synths."

"Wait, there are synths that look like humans?" Lillian asked, her eyes widening. 

"Yeah, where've you been?" asked the older man. "Problem is you can't tell that they're synths."

"Are _you_ a synth?" Lillian narrowed her eyes at him. 

"Get outta here," he said. 

"So anyway, who serves the drinks?" she asked. She really needed one now. 

"I do," said the older man, "Joe Savoldi. This is my son, Tony. And I won't have any more synth talk. Whaddya having?"

"Beer. Whiskey. Anything." 

"Here ya go." Joe handed her a bottle of beer. 

"Thanks." Lillian drank it in silence. "Hey, you wouldn't happen to know how much it costs to hire a detective, do you?"

"What do you need a detective for?" Tony asked. 

"My baby boy is missing."

"Shit, I'm sorry to hear that," said Joe. "Can't say I know how much it would be, but I think you need a hired gun first."

"Why do you say that?" asked Lillian. 

"You're new around here, aren't you? Don't even know what synths are." 

"I guess you're right," Lillian sighed. "So where would I go?"

"Goodneighbor's your best bet," he said. "Just watch yourself there. It doesn't always live up to its name."

"Goodneighbor?"

"Across the bridge, around the corner from that big Mass Fusion building," said Tony. 

"Thanks. Got a place I can stay the night here?" 

"Ten caps. Up the side there," Tony pointed. "Wait, is that your dog?" He gestured to Canigou. 

"Yeah."

"Extra for the dog. Fifteen caps." 

"Here's twenty," she handed him the caps. "Thanks for your help."

She headed up the ladder to the tiny room with no door. There was just a sleeping bag on the floor, but it was better than nothing. She laid out her own sleeping bag so Canigou could lie down. They soon fell asleep. 

The next morning, she checked out the market which consisted of one trader and one resting caravan who claimed he was a doctor. Lillian opted not to buy anything right now. She felt she had what she needed already, and besides she needed the money to hire someone to help her. 

She headed off across the bridge, looking at the tall buildings in Boston. She wondered how many of those are still sturdy. She could hear gunshots in the distance and hoped they wouldn't get closer. She really wanted to get to Goodneighbor and hire someone to help keep her safer. 

When Lillian arrived at the front of the Mass Fusion building, she noticed a few people outside. They were wearing army fatigues, but they weren't the same kind as the Brotherhood. She approached cautiously. 

"Excuse me," she called out, "Can you direct me to Goodneighbor?" 

"Move along!" the man closest to her yelled back. The other two grasped their guns tighter and watched her carefully. 

"I don't mean any trouble," Lillian held her hands up, "I just want to know where Goodneighbor is."

"Around the corner," the man said. 

"Thanks," she said and headed in the direction he had indicated. 

"Hey, where did you get that laser rifle?" one of the other men asked as she passed. Lillian remembered she had strapped the laser rifle Paladin Danse had given her to the side of ther backpack. 

"I got it from the Brotherhood of Steel," she replied. 

"Bullshit," he scoffed, "They don't just give their guns to random wastelanders."

"Well, I joined them, so..."

"Wait, you're a member of the Brotherhood?" the woman at the end narrowed her eyes. 

"Yeah, sort of. I helped them out, they offered me a place in their ranks."

"Huh." The second man said. "So where are they located?"

Lillian was now suspicious. "Lexington, but moving to somewhere on the east coast," she lied.

"Why aren't you going with them?"

"I have my own priorities to take care of," Lillian replied, now wanting to get going. 

"Interesting," the second man said, "Thank you. Move along now."

Lillian walked around the corner and saw the bright neon lights indicating the location of Goodneighbor. Subtle. There was garbage and debris piled up outside the main gate. Disgusting. Does no one clean up after themselves any more? Well, she supposed not if it was down to cleaning up or trying to stay alive. 

She entered the gate and was immediately accosted by a rough-looking man. 

"First time in Goodneighbor?" he lit a cigarette while eyeing her up and down. "Can't go walking around here without insurance."

"Insurance?" Lillian raised an eyebrow. Canigou growled at the man.

"Yeah, so just, uh, give me everything you got in them pockets," he said. 

"Yeah, no," Lillian crossed her arms. She was terrified, but she wasn't about to show it. "Get fucked."

"You---"

"Whoa, whoa, time out," a raspy voice interrupted. Lillian watched as a man in old Revolutionary dress approached. But his face was... jesus, it was like those ghouls she had killed in Cambridge. But this man wasn't feral. What was he?

"Someone steps through the gate the first time, they're a guest."

"Why d'you care? She ain't one of us," the rough-looking man said. "You're getting soft, Hancock."

"What, no love for your mayor? Let me tell you something." Hancock moved closer to the man like he was going to speak to him quietly, but then took out a knife and stabbed him in the abdomen. Lillian gasped and jumped back. "You okay, sister?" He asked her. 

"I... you're... you killed him!" her eyes went wide 

"You must be a detective with observational skills like that," he laughed, "Had to be done. Finn's been pulling this shit for too long."

"But... he... your face..." Lillian's mind was reeling at an all-time high, trying to make sense of everything. 

"Heh, like it? Gives me that sexy king of the zombies look," Hancock said, then noticed her confused look. "I'm a ghoul. But more than that, I'm the mayor of Goodneighbor. Anything goes here, so long as you remember who's in charge." He turned and headed into the Old State House, closely followed by a red-haired woman in metal armour. 

Lillian was left feeling confused. She watched as a couple of men in dirty clothes crouched at Finn's body and started rifling through his pockets. She gave them a wide berth and headed to what looked like a store. A bald man in sunglasses was leaning against the wall outside. 

"Hey," he greeted her. 

"Um, hi."

"What a day, huh?"

"Yeah, you could say that." 

"Well, nothing more to say." He walked away. Lillian watched him disappear around the corner. 

"You just going to stand there, or are you going to see what I have for sale?" a voice called from inside the store. Lillian turned and saw another ghoul, this time a woman, standing behind the counter. 

"Oh, um, hi, how are you?" She said politely, but still feeling unsure as she entered the store. 

"Well, look at you," the ghoul woman smiled, "Nice to have a friendly face around here. And you're not even screaming yet. Very polite."

"Wait, people scream at you?" Lillian asked even though she could understand why. 

"Not used to ghouls," the woman sighed, "Can't blame them, I'd probably do the same thing."

"But... I thought ghouls were..." she stopped. 

"Ah, you're talking about the feral ghouls. Their brains have been mostly destroyed by the radiation. But there are ghouls like myself and Mayor Hancock who still have our brain functions. Not nice to look at, I admit, but it's kept me alive for over 200 years."

"Wait, you're over 200 years old?"

"Okay, more like 250, but don't go blabbing to that to anyone," the ghoul woman said, "You have any idea what it's like being that old?"

"Yeah. Well, sort of."

"Hah, look at you. You're younger than I was when the bombs dropped."

"My family and I were in a vault. They put us in cryogenic stasis. I just got out last week."

"Wow. Well I don't envy you. I've had time to get used to all this. How are you coping?" the ghoul woman asked kindly. 

"Barely. I came here to hire someone as an extra gun."

"Ah, well you want MacCready. He's down in the Third Rail. Oh, and I'm Daisy," she held out her hand. Lillian shook it, surprised at how it felt rough and soft at the same time. 

"Lillian," she said. "Thanks."

"Before you go, care to buy something?" Daisy asked. Lillian obliged, figuring it was the least she could do. She bought a couple tins of dogfood for Canigou. She headed around to the Third Rail, which was the old subway station. Another ghoul welcomed her and she went downstairs. 

A Mr. Handy was behind the bar and a number of other people were drinking at tables and sofas around the main area. It looked like the subway tunnel had caved in on a train at one end. A woman in a red dress stepped up to a microphone on a small platform on the other end and started to sing. Lillian stayed where she was, happy to hear some live music. When the woman had finished her song, Lillian clapped then quickly stopped when she realised no one else was. Does no one appreciate good music anymore?

"You here for a drink, or looking for MacCready?" a woman sitting on a nearby sofa asked her. 

"Both," Lillian replied. 

"Drinks over there, MacCready's in the back," the woman thumbed towards a private room in the back. 

Lillian thanked her and headed towards the room, stopping just outside when she overheard some men arguing. She leaned against the wall to wait and listen. 

"Can't say I'm surprised to find you in a dump like this, MacCready."

"It's been almost three months. Don't tell me you're getting rusty."

"Word has it you're still taking jobs here in the Commonwealth. That isn't gonna work for us."

"In case you forgot, I left the Gunners for good. And I don't take orders from you anymore. So why don't you take your girlfriend and get the hell out of here while you still can."

"What? Winlock, don't tell me we have to listen to this shit."

"You can play the tough guy all you want, but if we hear you're still operating within Gunner territory, all bets are off."

"You finished?"

"Yeah, we're finished. Let's go, Barnes."

A moment later two men wearing the same type of fatigues as the ones outside of Mass Fusion passed her. They barely glanced at her as they headed out. She wondered if this was still a good idea. But she didn't have much choice. She entered the room and saw a young man sitting on a chair and quietly cursing to himself. 

"Hi, you're MacCready, right?" she asked. 

"Look, lady, if you're here to preach about Atom or looking for a friend, you've got the wrong guy," he looked up at her, "But if you need a hired gun, then we can talk."

"I do, but," she looked in the direction the other two men had left, "Why don't you tell me what's up with those guys first."

"Winlock and Barnes? Pfft. They couldn't hit a molerat with a rocket launcher if it was dead two feet in front of them." 

"They won't be a problem later?"

"Nah. Now what about you? How do I know I won't end up with a bullet in my back?" he narrowed his eyes at her. 

"You don't. All part of the risk, right?" she narrowed her eyes back. No way she was going to let him get the upper hand. 

"Got that right," he stood up. "Price is 250 caps up front. No room for bargaining."

"Everything's negotiable," Lillian tried not to let it on that she didn't have 250 caps. "Would you take 100? And we split everything we earn on jobs 60/40 to you."

"Make that 75/25."

"65/35."

"You drive a hard bargain, but you got yourself an extra gun," MacCready smiled at her. She handed over the caps and he pulled out a pack from behind the dresser. "Lead on, boss."

"You can just call me Lillian," she held her hand out to him. 

"MacCready," he shook her hand, "But you already knew that. This your dog?"

"He is now," she said, "His name is Canigou."

"Weird name for a dog."

"I suppose. Named him after my great-grandfather's dog. And he named his dog after a mountain in France."

"Huh."

"First stop, drinks. I need one." Lillian and MacCready went over to the bar, ordered a couple of beers, and sat at a table in the corner. 

"So what's the plan?" MacCready asked. 

"Well, I suppose the plan right now is to find work," she sighed, "I need to hire a detective and if they charge as much as you, I'm going to need more caps."

"Sure thing," he took a drink. "Hancock might know of something. Let's go see him when we're done here." 

They finished up their beers and headed up to the Old State House. Upon entering, Lillian paused to look around. She hadn't been there since high school on a field trip. It was far more dirtier now, but the spiral staircase was still standing. MacCready led the way upstairs to a large room where Hancock was arranging some inhalers of Jet around on a coffee table. 

"Well, look who it is," he greeted Lillian, "And with none other than MacCready. So what can I do for our newcomer?"

"We're looking for work," she replied. 

"Work, huh?" Hancock paused in thought. "Tell you what, I have reconnaissance needs. There's a lot of weird talk coming out of a place called the Pickman Gallery. It's Raider territory there, but it's been quiet. Like, uncomfortable post-coitus quiet? Go snoop around and see what you can find."

"Sure thing," said Lillian. She dreaded what was going to be waiting for them, but at least she had someone with her this time. They headed out of the State House. 

"I've seen some dead Raiders with a weird calling card on them," said MacCready, "It's creepy. Maybe it's the same thing." 

"Oh great," said Lillian, "Couldn't he have had an easier job like needing his car washed or his lawn mowed?"

"But.. Hancock doesn't have a car," said MacCready, confused, not getting the joke, "No one does."

"Never mind," Lillian smiled to herself. They headed toward the Pickman Gallery. "Wait," she suddenly grabbed MacCready's arm, "I don't want to kill anyone."

"Well you could've mentioned that before," MacCready exasperated, "And you'll probably have to kill someone."

"I know," Lillian kept her eyes down, "It's just... I'd rather not." 

"Fine," MacCready sighed, "I'll take point, but you cover me. If you have to, aim to disarm. I'll take care of the rest." 

Lillian could tell MacCready was deeply annoyed, but didn't say anything further. They walked in silence to the Pickman Gallery where Raiders were milling about outside. 

"Hold up," he said quietly, crouching. Lillian crouched behind him and watched as he armed his sniper rifle and aimed at the Raiders. She plugged her ears as he shot them down before they could figure out where the shots were coming from. 

"Damn," she said when he shot the last Raider. 

"Impressed yet?" he turned and grinned at her. 

"Very impressed," she replied, "You've obviously been doing this for a long time."

"Ever since I was a kid. Figured it was better to be further away from my targets."

"Yeah, I could never get the hang of using a sniper on moving targets. But if we're ever attacked by stationery paper targets, I got it covered."

"Heh, well I could help you out there," he said. "You can't always rely on that pistol." He pointed at the pistol in her hand. 

"That's what Paladin Danse said," she said, looking down at her gun. 

"Paladin? You mean, there's Brotherhood of Steel around here?" he raised his eyebrows. "They're good to have around, but... just be careful."

"Why?"

"Well, they're not exactly into helping others, you know? Maybe ten years ago they were more into goodwill in the Capital Wasteland, but now with that Maxson guy in charge, it's all Brotherhood first."

"I mean, taking care of the troops is a priority. Can't protect others if they can't protect themselves."

"Yeah, but I mean it's Brotherhood first, second, and third. Maybe they'll consider helping others but only if it benefits them."

"Oh," she said, "Well, they didn't seem too bad. I mean, I only met three of them. They desperately needed help."

"Huh, must be on some sort of recon or something."

"Yeah, that's what they said." She watched as MacCready checked the pockets of the Raiders he killed and took the ammo from their guns. "So, is it a bad thing then that I joined?"

"You did?" he raised his eyebrows at her, "And they let you leave?"

"Well, yeah. I told them my priority was to find my son and I wasn't going to just sit around."

"Damn, so that's why you need a detective." They approached the door to Pickman Gallery. "Anyway, let's talk more later. There are probably more Raiders in there so just be prepared." MacCready quietly opened the door a crack, looked in, and turned to Lillian. "There's a few down the hallway. Want me to take them out?"

"No," she said, "Let me talk to them."

"Are you crazy?"

"Let me try! Is there a spot you can hide? At least keep me covered." MacCready nodded. "Okay, let's go in quietly and I'll wait until you're hidden. Canigou, stay here. Guard." Canigou woofed quietly and sat to the side. They crept in and MacCready hid behind a cabinet in the hall. Lillian took a deep breath and called out to the Raiders at the end of the hall. "Um, hello? Please don't shoot!"

"What the fuck?" one of the Raiders aimed his shotgun at her. "Who are you? I'll fucking kill you!"

"Whoa, whoa!" Lillian held her hands up to show she was unarmed, "I don't want any trouble. I only want to know what's going on in this place and then I'll leave."

"This Pickman asshole's been killing our people for his fucking art," another Raider said, "We're here to make sure this shit stops."

"Killing for art? What do you mean?"

"Have a look in that room there," the first Raider indicated the room to Lillian's left. She looked in and immediately vomited. MacCready rushed out of hiding to her. "What the fuck, she brought backup!" The Raider shot at them, but MacCready had pushed her into the room and shot back at the Raiders. After a bit, everything went quiet.

"Ugh, I'm so sorry," Lillian said. She had kept her eyes closed and her hand over her mouth and nose when MacCready had pushed her into the room. He finally had a moment to look. 

"It's not your fault," he said, "This place is disgusting."

"It smells so bad," Lillian gagged a little and went back to the hallway. 

"Hold on, I see something over there," MacCready went further into the room and returned with a holotape. "Here, see what this says."

Lillian put the holotape in her Pip-boy. The voice of a horrified man started to speak. 

_"Seth, it's me. I found out what happened to the scouts that went missing up near the old art gallery. They're... they're dead. I'm looking at a-- a goddamn painting of Kyle's body! Oh god, what the hell did they do to him?"_

_A sinister humming interrupted the man._

_"Who the hell's there?"_

_"Admiring my collection?" a cheerful man's voice came through. "I'm afraid it's not complete yet. Soon, though."_

_"You.. stay away from me, you psycho!" the first man yelled._

_"Yes, just like that. Hold that expression on your face."_

The holotape clicked off. 

"Jesus," said MacCready, "Well, I think we have everything we need. I'd rather not meet this Pickman guy."

"Me neither, let's head back." Lillian wasted no time in leaving. While the air outside was slightly bitter, she breathed it in deeply, happy to be away from the festering flesh and blood in the gallery. She pet Canigou who was sniffing at her and they headed back to Goodneighbor.

"So what's the story with the Pickman place?" Hancock asked as Lillian and MacCready walked in. 

"Ugh, he was using corpses for his... art," Lillian looked disgusted. 

"Seriously?" Hancock's eyes widened, "Shit, that's messed up. I'll spread the word to avoid that area. Here, you definitely earned this." He handed over a pouch of caps. "And how about a little pick-me-up? I've got some Jet here, good stuff."

"Um, I'll pass today, thanks," Lillian said as she and MacCready headed out of the State House. "So is there somewhere to stay here for the night?"

"Hotel Rexford," MacCready led her around the State House to the hotel. "It's quiet most nights."

"Most nights?" 

"Well, sometimes there are people who offer their... services, if you get my meaning."

"Like what? Oh. OH. Okay," Lillian suddenly realised what he meant. "Are you okay with sharing a room? It'll be cheaper."

"So long as we keep things strictly professional," he insisted. 

"Of course." They checked into the Hotel Rexford and headed up to their room. When they reached the hallway, a ghoul in a yellow fedora and trenchcoat left his room. 

"Wha- how- it's... it's you!" the ghoul stammered, "From Sanctuary Hills, right?"

"Yeah, how did-- wait, are you from Vault-Tec?" Lillian was shocked, now seeing in her mind that cheerful salesman who had rung her doorbell that fateful morning. 

"I AM Vault-Tec. Twenty years of service and I wasn't even on the list to get in," he said sullenly. 

Lillian felt herself overcome with anger. "You asshole!" She slapped him hard across the face. "You ruined my life!"

" _I_ ruined your life? Ooohhh, poor you. Look at me! I spent over 200 years looking like this! I'm a freak! But you! How are you still so perfect?"

"Wait, you didn't know?"

"Know what?"

"The vault had these pods that froze us in place," Lillian said, "I only got out recently. I was... I was the only one."

"What?" The Vault-Tec rep looked horrified, "Vault-Tec never me that! That's... that's... " He sighed sadly. "You know, you're the only person I've met from before. I've just been so alone here. No one wants a ghoul with over 200 years of sales experience." 

"I'm... I'm sorry," said Lillian, "If you want somewhere else to stay, you could head back to Sanctuary."

"What, with your crazy robot?" the Vault-Tec rep scoffed, "You know, I stayed there for about a year after the bombs dropped. But I couldn't take his incessant cheerfulness anymore." 

"Well, there should be some other people there now. And I'll come visit, I promise."

"You will? Really?" 

"Yes, I don't know when, but I'll get there as soon as I can." 

"Okay! I'll head there first thing in the morning!" The Vault-Tec rep was glowing with happiness now. 

"I'll see you there," said Lillian, "Oh, and sorry for slapping you."

"No harm done. See you in Sanctuary!" The Vault-Tec rep returned to his room. 

"What the hell was that about?" MacCready asked when they entered their room.

Lillian tossed her pack onto the floor, sat on the edge of the bed, and explained about the vault, the cryo pods, and the murder-kidnapping. 

"Damn, you're like something out of a comic book," MacCready's eyes widened. 

"Only this is real," she sighed. "Anyway, let's get some sleep. We can share the bed, if you want."

"Sounds good. Strictly professional, right?"

"Of course."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Strictly professional until it isn't.


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lillian and MacCready return a book to the library. MacCready has a proposition for Lillian. They meet Piper at Diamond City.

The next morning, she woke up and carefully got out of the bed without waking MacCready. She used the old dresser as a barre to do her morning exercises, humming as she did so. When she finished, she took out a can of dog food and opened it. 

"If that's breakfast, I don't want any," MacCready yawned, sitting up. 

"It's for the dog,"she said, "I have brahmin steaks for us."

"That's more like it." 

"Oh, and here," she tossed the bag of caps Hancock had paid them to MacCready. 

"Isn't this the whole amount?" he asked. 

"Yeah, I didn't do anything, really," she said, "So I'd say you earned the lot."

"Nah, we agreed. 65/35 split," he dumped the caps out on the bed and divided them up. 

After they ate, Lillian put her boots and jacket on. "Where else could we get paying work around here?" 

"Let's go talk to Daisy. She's one of the few trustworthy people around here. If she doesn't have anything, she might know someone who does." 

  
"MacCready!" Daisy greeted as they headed into her shop. "Thought you were avoiding me."

"Never," MacCready smiled at her. 

"You wouldn't happen to have any work, do you?" Lillian asked. 

"I do, actually," she said wistfully, "I'd appreciate it if you could clear out the old library. Call me sentimental, but the thought of super mutants taking over the place makes me sick. And if you could return this book." She handed an old book to Lillian. "It's slightly overdue, but I don't think I'll be fined for it," she chuckled. 

"Sure thing, Daisy," said MacCready. 

Lillian put the book in her pack and they headed out of Goodneighbor. 

"Super mutants? I don't know if I can do that," she said. 

"You're not thinking of talking to them, are you?" MacCready joked. 

"No, it's just... I've never come across any before." 

"Oh, okay," he suddenly stopped. "Shh, there's one just around the corner there. Big green thing sitting down? Take him out. I got you covered."

"Are you sure?" she whispered, taking out her pistol. MacCready nods, readying his rifle. She aimed her pistol at the back of the super mutant's head and fired. The impact knocked the mutant forward. He stood up, wondering where the shot had come from. Lillian fired her gun again and this time killed him. 

"Good job," MacCready said quietly, "Just hold on a moment, see if any others show up." After a few minutes, he was satisfied there weren't any other mutants around and went over to inspect the dead one. 

"Ugh, it smells so bad," Lillian wrinkled her nose in disgust. "I don't know which is worse, this or the Pickman place."

"Yeah, they're not concerned about bathing," he said, kneeling down by the mutant. Canigou trotted over, sniffed at the dead super mutant, then lifted his leg. 

"Thanks, boy," Lillian snorted with laughter, "it smells better already." Canigou woofed proudly when he finished. 

MacCready picked up a stick and drew a crude map in the dirt. "Okay, so I think the library is over here, but we should go around this way."

"It's faster to go that way, past the Common," Lillian pointed. 

"Yeah, no. No one goes to the Common unless they like getting killed."

"Why, what's there?" She looked at the map Scribe Haylen had given her. The Boston Common was marked with a large X and a question mark. 

"No one knows," MacCready shrugged. "But people who go there don't come back and, personally, I don't really want to find out."

"Damn," Lillian cursed, "It was so nice before. Okay then, we'll detour around." 

She followed MacCready to the library. At least it was still standing and now she wondered if the books inside were still there. The main entrance doors were locked so she led the way around to the side door. She tried the door and was interrupted by the building's automated intercom. 

"Welcome to the Boston Public Library. The library is currently closed. Only employees and those with a scheduled appointment may enter. All other guests are invited to return during normal business hours." 

"Oh, um, I had an appointment," Lillian said into the intercom, shrugging at MacCready. 

"I'm sorry, but there are no appointments scheduled for today."

"Okay then. I work here, let me in," she said more confidently. 

"Please provide your six-digit employee ID number."

"Shit, okay. One, two, three, four, five.... six?"

"Welcome, Mr. Mayor. Please enjoy your visit."

"Goddamn, I wonder if that code works everywhere," Lillian smiled as she opened the now unlocked door. 

They went in and saw the first study room in disarray, as she expected. She returned Daisy's book to the book return kiosk and retrieved the book return tokens. There were only some Protectrons and turrets around, but no super mutants. Maybe the building's security had already taken care of them. She no sooner had finished thinking that, when the Protectrons down the hallway started shooting. 

MacCready waved at her to get down and she hid behind one of the shelves across from him. Canigou crouched against her, growling. MacCready looked around from his hiding spot, then quickly aimed and fired down the hallway. Lillian peeked and saw a number of super mutants plus mutant hounds hurtling down the hallway. She fired her pistol at the green monsters while trying to keep Canigou from attacking. If those mutant hounds got hold of her dog... she didn't want to think of it. 

Her pistol clicked, indicating she had to reload. But she had no more ammo. She swore loudly and slammed her pistol on the floor. Then she remembered Paladin Danse's laser rifle, still strapped to her backpack. She quickly removed it, loaded it, and aimed. The first super mutant disintegrated when it was hit by the laser, the second merely staggered before being brought down by MacCready. A few more mutants were added to the growing pile of corpses. 

"Is that it?" Lillian asked when it had gone silent. 

"I don't know," MacCready looked down the hallway but saw no more super mutants, "I think--" he was then interrupted by more gunfire further inside the library. "Dammit."

They rushed down the hall and around the corner in time to see a Protectron explode at the top of the stairs. It seemed that the super mutants were taking the subway entrance to get in. MacCready grabbed the back of Lillian's coat and pulled her back. 

"Hold up," he reached into his pocket and took out a grenade. 

"You've had that this whole time?" she hissed at him, "What if it exploded in there?"

"Then we'd be dead, but we're not," he hissed back. He pulled the pin, counted quietly to himself, then lobbed the grenade down the stairs. He quickly pulled another grenade from his pocket, pulled the pin and threw it down the stairs. There were two explosions one right after the other, followed by the sound of the mutants groaning in pain. 

Lillian followed MacCready to the top of the stairs to see bits of super mutant bodies flung all over. A few of the mutants were still alive, but barely. MacCready shot them dead and looted the bodies. 

"Jesus." Lillian approached the super mutant bodies. "To think, the worst people you met in libraries in my time were horny homeless guys." 

"Heh, which was easier to deal with?" MacCready elbowed her in jest. 

"Well, the library had more security back then, and not just robots." She looked around and sighed. "Shame, it was nice coming here. When I was studying for my law degree, I pretty much lived in libraries."

"So you were a, uh, what do you call it," MacCready snapped his fingers, trying to think of the word he was looking for. 

"A lawyer." 

"That's it!" He snapped and pointed at her. "So that's what you did? Defend people when they committed crimes and all that?"

"Never got that far," Lillian picked up a scorched book and flipped through the pages carefully, "I got my degree, then I got pregnant. Decided to wait until after I had the baby to start work. The weekend before I was to start, the bombs dropped. And I focused on property law, not criminal law. Though, you could argue there's not much difference. But I wouldn't have dealt with thefts or murders or things like that." 

"Damn. Sounds boring," MacCready scrunched his face. 

"Ha, I guess it would be, but I wanted to try to get the Boston Opera House out of the hands of the damn army," Lillian said bitterly. "They took it over, citing the funding should be deferred to them to help with the war effort. So many of us lost our jobs and positions. I was lucky that I had a backup plan, but others didn't."

"Huh." MacCready looked around. "So, wanna look around a bit?"

"Sure." Lillian and Canigou wandered to the study room while MacCready headed elsewhere. She ran her fingers lightly across the brittle spines of books on the shelves. 

  
_"So, come here often?"_

_Lillian looked up to see the man she accidentally shot at the military training yard. Nate, or something._

_"I'm very busy," she returned her gaze to her notes._

_"I see," he sat down across from her, "What are you studying?"_

_"Do you mind?" she asked, annoyed._

_"Am I not allowed to ask a simple question?"_

_"I don't like to be bothered."_

_"I mean, you DID shoot me in the butt," he said, "I'm surprised I can even sit down right now."_

_Lillian glared back at him as he grinned at her. "I'm studying law. There, question answered."_

_"Can I ask another question?"_

_"You just did."_

_"Damn, how many questions can I ask?"_

_"Three. And that one is the third question you've asked, so you can leave now."_

_"Actually, I've asked five questions so far. You're a terrible lawyer."_

_"Go. Away."_

_"Wanna go out for coffee sometime? Or a beer? Or a vat of acid, if you prefer?"_

_"With you? No!"_

_"Please?"_

_"No."_

_"Do I need to mention how sore my butt is? I mean, it's so bruised it may never be the same again."_

_"Are you trying to guilt trip me into a date?"_

_"Is it working?"_

_Lillian sighed. "Tell you what. One coffee, after the library closes at 7. Then I never want to see you again."_

_"Deal. See you at 7." Nate grinned, stood up and left. Lillian rolled her eyes before returning to her work._

  
"Dammit, Nate, why'd you have to be so charming?" she said to herself. She left to find MacCready in the children's section. He quickly shoved a book into his pack when he noticed her. 

"Someone's been looking for books for their, uh, kid," he stammered. 

"Wanna head back?" Lillian asked. He nodded. She took one more look around and followed MacCready out with Canigou trotting beside her. They started back to Goodneighbor in silence, keeping their eyes and ears open for trouble. Luckily there was none and they returned to Daisy with the good news. 

"Oh, one more thing, Daisy," MacCready took out the book from his pack, "Make sure this gets to him? Oh, and this too." He shoved an envelope with the book to Daisy. 

"Of course!" 

"Thanks, doll," MacCready smiled at her, then turned to Lillian. "Beer?"

"Oh god, yes," Lillian led the way to the Third Rail. They each bought a beer from Charlie and headed back to the VIP room. "So. MacCready." She sat down on the sofa. "What's your story?"

"Not much to tell," he sat in a chair across from her, "Grew up in the Capital Wasteland, learned to use a rifle, ended up here."

"Oh, come on, there's more to it then that, I'm sure."

"Well, you told me about yourself, so I guess it's only fair. I grew up in a place called Little Lamplight. All kids. No adults were allowed, we couldn't trust them. Once you were old enough, you left."

"Only kids? How did you survive?"

"Oh, we managed. Everyone did their share. A caravan stopped by every so often so we could trade for things we needed, but they weren't allowed in." He paused and laughed. "I was even mayor for a few years, can you believe that?"

"Mayor MacCready. Has a good ring to it. Ever consider taking it up again?"

"Ha, nah. It was good while it lasted, but I moved on. When I was old enough, I left. Did some mercenary work. Made the mistake of joining the Gunners, but I left."

"The Gunners?"

"Remember those two as- erm, jerks that were in here when you met me? They're from the Gunners. They're a mercenary group, got a rep for being crazy and so tightly-wound you'd think they were a cult or something."

"How did you even join them?"

"Seemed like a good idea at the time. But now I regret it. They keep driving off clients and I need all the caps I can get."

"Well, caps aren't everything."

"Says you who needs them for a detective."

"Oh yeah," Lillian sat back, "But why do you need so many caps?"

"Well, I thought maybe I could just buy off Winlock and Barnes and they'd just leave me alone."

"You're joking, right? I wouldn't trust them any more than I would trust a super mutant to take a shower."

"Yeah, I'm with you on that. Those two always have an army of Gunners with them. They'd probably just take the caps then put a bullet in my head. But I suppose... Nah, never mind."

"What?"

"Well, suppose you and I paid them a surprise visit. Take them out before they realise what's going on."

"I don't know..." Lillian said sceptically, "I mean, I'm not really comfortable with shooting people."

"You're going to have to eventually. And why not start with the Gunners? It's not like they're out there making the world a better place."

"I guess. It's just.." she sighed, "I'm still getting used to all this."

"How about this, we go pick up a sniper rifle for you from Kleo's and I'll teach you how to shoot moving targets."

"What kind of moving targets?" Lillian narrowed her eyes at him. 

"I dunno, bloatflies, bloodbugs, radroaches, whatever creature that moves. We can find some feral ghouls too." He looked at her sceptical face. "Don't worry, I've got your back."

"Okay. Tomorrow?" 

"Sounds good. Cheers, partner," He lifted his beer bottle to her as she lifted hers back. 

  
The next morning, Lillian woke up to MacCready holding her tightly from behind. She elbowed him lightly. 

"Hey, get up," she said. 

"Mmmf," he murmured into the back of her head. 

She elbowed him harder. "Get off me!" 

He tightened his hold and she felt his lips on the back of her neck. 

"I swear to god, if that's not your gun poking me in the ass, I'm going to cut it off!" she yelled, startling MacCready awake. 

"Wha-- OH! Shi-- Sorry!" He scrambled off the bed and fell to the floor. 

"Well. Good morning to you too," Lillian sat up. "As much as I'd like to get to know you better, I'd prefer other ways to do it."

"Sorry, I didn't mean-- um, excuse me," he rushed out of the room and presumably to the common bathroom down the hall. Lillian smirked to herself and started stretching. By the time MacCready returned, he was still flushed and she was in the middle of her morning barre exercises. 

"All good now?" she asked, bending into grand plie. 

"Yeah," he replied, sitting down on the sofa, "All good."

"Good," she rose back to standing, "Don't worry, no harm done. Sorry for yelling at you."

"So, um, you still want to learn to shoot today?"

"Of course," repeating the grand plie, "I need another fifteen minutes or so, then we can have a bite to eat, and then head out."

"Sure thing." He watched her continue until she was finished. 

After breakfast, they packed up and headed down to Kleo's. 

"Well, hello," the assaultron greeted them, "Everything here is guaranteed to injure, maim, or kill at your discretion. Except me. I only kill when I want to."

"Heya," MacCready greeted her, "Got any decent sniper rifles in?"

"Of course," Kleo retrieved a rifle and handed it to MacCready to inspect. 

"Sooo, you're an assaultron?" Lillian asked unsurely. 

"That's what my makers call me. But as far as I'm concerned, I'm a woman, baby. And I run this store selling very large guns."

"Oh! Well... you certainly look like a woman," said Lillian. 

"So, are we in business?" Kleo turned to MacCready. 

"Looks good," he turned to Lillian who looked back at him for a moment. "Uh, you gonna pay her?"

"What? Oh, right," Lillian took off her backpack to retrieve her sack of caps, "Sorry, still getting used to this. Um, how much?"

"180 caps," said Kleo. 

"Okay, oh, and ammo, we need ammo for it too," Lillian said as she started counting out the caps. 

"Just one box, Kleo, I have plenty for both us," MacCready said. 

"200 caps even."

Lillian paid and picked up the rifle. It was heavier than she anticipated, but looked forward to shooting it. She slung it over her shoulder and followed MacCready out of Goodneighbor. 

"So where are we going?" she asked. 

"Well, Winlock and Barnes are at the Mass Pike Interchange - you remember where that is, right?" Lillian nodded. "So I figure we should head that way. Stop in at Diamond City on the way to pick up anything else we need, rest, and then head outside the city."

"Sounds good," Lillian agreed, "Maybe I can find out more about that detective there. See if I have enough caps already." 

They retraced their steps to the Boston Public Library without incident, and continued on towards the west end of the city. They reached the old ball park and were greeted by a guard wearing the leather pads of a baseball catcher. 

"You looking for Diamond City? Just follow the signs," he pointed. 

"Hold on, Diamond City is Fenway Park?" Lillian asked. 

"I guess?" MacCready shrugged. 

"Well this I gotta see," she hurried to the main gate to find it completely shut. A woman in a red leather coat and newsboy cap was talking into a nearby intercom. 

"Come on, Danny, open the door!" 

"I'm sorry, but Mayor McDonough's really steamed, Piper," the intercom buzzed, "Sayin' that article you wrote was all lies. The whole city's in a tizzy." 

"You open this game right now, Danny Sullivan!" the woman, presumably named Piper, yelled, "I live here! You can't just lock me out!" 

"I got orders not to let you in, Piper, I'm sorry," the voice on the intercom sounded apologetic. "I'm just doing job."

"Ooo, just doing your job? Protecting Diamond City means keeping me out, is that it?" Piper said sarcastically, "'Oh, look, it's the scary reporter! Boo!'" She paused a moment to wait for a reply, but there's nothing. "Open uuuuup!" Piper sighed angrily and turned to see Lillian and MacCready watching her. 

"Hey, you," she whispered loudly, "You want into Diamond City, right?" 

"Uh, yeah," said Lillian. 

"Play along," she whispered, then started talking normally. "What was that? You said you're a trader up from Quincy? You have enough supplies to keep the general store stocked for a whole month?"

"Wait, I never---" Lillian started to say, but Piper hushed her quickly. 

"You hear that, Danny?" Piper turned back to the intercom, "You hear that, Danny? You gonna open the gate and let us in, or are you going to be the one to tell crazy Myrna about losing out on all this supply?"

"Geez, alright," the voice exasperated, "No need to make it personal, Piper. Give me a minute." 

The huge green gate creaked and groaned as it was lifted up. Lillian took a moment to remember how it used to be so quiet. 

"Better head inside quick before ol' Danny catches on to the bluff," Piper said to them. 

"Sounds good, let's go," Lillian said, as she and MacCready headed through the open gate. A portly man in a grey suit was pacing and barely addressed them. She noticed a guard over by the old ticket counter watching nervously and she approached him. 

"So, you're that trader Piper was talking about?" he asked suspiciously, "Something tells me she's pulled the wool over my eyes again, am I right?"

"Sorry, it all just happened so fast," Lillian apologised. 

"Well, you're not the first one Piper pulled into a heap of trouble they weren't ready for," he sighed. 

"Wait, are we in trouble?" Lillian asked. 

"What? No! I mean, not you, I don't think," Danny looked over at the man in the grey suit and Piper who were arguing, "No, you're fine. I'm sure. I mean, it's Piper the one who's in trouble."

"What did she do?"

"Wrote a slanderous article about the mayor," he pointed at the man then lowered his voice, "Implied that Mayor McDonough is a synth."

"No shi- I mean, no way," said MacCready. 

"Well, I mean, you can't believe everything you read, right?" said Danny. 

"Very true, what evidence does Piper provide that he's a synth?" Lillian asked. 

"Not much, really. You can find a copy of her paper inside. Anyway, welcome to Diamond City and all that." 

Lillian and MacCready turned towards Piper and Mayor McDonough who were still arguing loudly. They were about to pass by and go inside until Piper noticed them.

"Hey, why don't we ask the newcomer?" Piper said angrily, "You support the news? 'Cause the mayor's threatening to throw free speech in the dumpster."

"Always believed in freedom of the press," Lillian replied. 

"That's a pretty outdated concept, if you ask me," MacCready added, "Who even cares anymore?"

"Pfft," Piper brushed him off.

"Oh, I didn't mean to bring you into this, miss," Mayor McDonough said, "No, no, no, you look like Diamond City material." 

"Um, thanks? I guess," Lillian raised her eyebrow.

"Welcome to the great green jewel of the Commonwealth," McDonough said theatrically, "Safe, happy. A fine place to come, spend your money, settle down. Don't let this muckraker tell you otherwise, alright?" He glared at Piper. 

"Well I'm sure it's very nice," said Lillian. 

"Oh yeah, greatest house of cards in the Commonwealth until the wind blows," Piper rolled her eyes.

McDonough cleared his throat. "Now, was there anything particular you came to our city for?"

"Oh, just supplies and a place to rest," said Lillian, "and also to talk to the detective you have here."

"Ah, Nick Valentine," said McDonough, "Haven't seen him in a little while, probably out working a case, but I'm sure he'll return soon and charge a reasonable fee." 

"Yeah, because Diamond City Security can't be bothered," Piper said. 

"Well, I don't have time for any more questions, I'm a busy man," McDonough turned away from them, "Enjoy your stay in our fair city!"

"Nice man," MacCready snorted. 

"About as nice as eating nails for breakfast," said Piper. "So what do you want ol' Nicky for?"

Lillian paused a moment, wondering if she should tell Piper. "I'm looking for my baby boy. He's missing, and I don't even know where to start."

"Your son is missing? I'm so sorry," Piper sounded sympathetic, "Yeah, Nick's good at finding missing people. Unfortunately people go missing all the time, but he's the only one who actually tries to do something about it. The mayor doesn't allow any of the security to help."

"Why's that?" asked Lillian.

"Oh, they're always 'too busy' or 'don't have time'," Piper sighed, annoyed, "Look, I gotta go get settled in, but, uh, stop by my office later. I have an idea for an article that you would be perfect for." Piper walked past them and up the steps into the stadium. 

"After you," MacCready stretched his arm out towards the steps to let Lillian go ahead. 


	8. Chapter 8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lillian, MacCready, and Canigou go into Diamond City.
> 
> EDIT: I changed the tag for Lillian and MacCready's relationship, I mislabeled it as romantic rather than friendship. They're going to have a bit of a moment later, but it won't go any further.

"Oh my god, what did they do to the place?" Lillian stood in awe over the former baseball diamond now populated with makeshift shacks. 

"Looks a little different from when you were last here, huh?" MacCready joked. 

"Oh, just a little bit," she said, "I'm impressed, but kind of annoyed. I've been to a lot of great games here."

"It's been a little while since I've been here, but nothing's changed," he led the way down the steps. 

  
_"How about these seats, huh?" Nate sat next to Lillian overlooking third base._

_"You know, I've never been to a ball game before," she said._

_"You're joking," Nate's eyes widened, "Didn't you say you lived here nearly your entire life?"_

_"Yep."_

_"And you've never been here."_

_"Not until now."_

_"Oh my god, you poor, depraved soul," Nate put his arm around her. "This, my dear, is a baseball diamond," he spoke like she was a toddler and pointed to the field, "Those are baseball players."_

_"Shut up, idiot, I've seen baseball games on tv," she elbowed him with a grin._

_"Well, now you need the full experience. How many hot dogs do you think you could eat?"_

_"Uh, two?"_

_"So one jumbo dog with the works coming up. How many beers?"_

_"Whoa, what do you mean just one hot dog?"_

_"Lilli, these are ballpark dogs, they're the size of your arm. I refuse to be responsible for you exploding."_

_"If you say so. I'll just have what you're having."_

_"Aw yeah, babe, get ready for greatness."_

  
"Hey, you coming?" MacCready's voice interrupted her thoughts. 

"Yeah, sorry," she continued down the steps, "Just thinking about things."

"About what this looked like before all the schlubs moved in?"

"Yeah." 

"Let's pick up some more ammo then go to the Dugout Inn," he said, "You didn't pick up anything for your pistol or laser rifle in Goodneighbor."

"Oh yeah," Lillian shook her head in disbelief. So many things to remember now. 

She followed MacCready to the bottom of the steps as a woman in a grey suit and short white hair approached. 

"Hi!" Lillian greeted the woman cheerfully. 

"Oh god, another one of the poor and stupid to come begging for table scraps?" the woman sighed and rolled her eyes. 

"Excuse me?" Lillian was surprised at the rudeness. 

"Oh, don't act like you don't know. There's two types of people in this town. The ones living in the stands and everyone else beneath us." the woman said with an air of superiority. 

"And you are?" 

"Ann Codman," she replied, "Now why don't you run along and make yourself scarce?" 

"Bitch," Lillian said under her breath as the woman passed. 

"What was that?" Ann turned and glared at her, "Oh, whatever. I'm done talking to you anyway." She climbed a different set of stairs to the shacks built into the stands.

"I guess she's not a fan," said MacCready. 

"It's ironic, in a way," Lillian said, pointing up at the shacks, "Those were the cheap seats."

"Ha! Really?" 

She nodded. "Field level seats were the most expensive."

"What about where the mayor lives?" MacCready pointed up. 

"Broadcast booth," she said, "The guys calling the game sat up there for radio and tv." 

"So not quite so glamourous and exclusive, huh?" 

"Not entirely. There were private boxes too, mostly for corporations and big businesses. I don't think any of them actually watched games, just wanted to impress clients." 

MacCready shook his head. "Stupid." 

"Yeah," Lillian sighed. She never thought she'd actually miss loathing the privilege people had. Sure, Ann Codman seemed to be more privileged than others, but she was still living in a shack in an old baseball stadium. 

She followed MacCready to the weapons dealer, who introduced himself as Arturo. 

"And you must be the new girl," he greeted Lillian. 

"Uh, the new girl?"

"Word travels fast around here."

"No kidding. I've been here for all of five minutes."

"So what can I get you? I've got a bit of everything."

"Just ammo. 10mm and fusion cells," said Lillian. 

"Sure thing, how many do you need?"

"Uh, I... don't know," she glanced over at MacCready. 

"At least 50 of each, more if you got it," MacCready said. 

"Wait, I'm not sure if I have enough."

Arturo raised his eyebrows at both of them. "Not too knowledgeable about guns, huh?" Lillian shook her head apologetically. "No matter, I got what you need. Can I see what you've got?"

Lillian took out her pistol and laser rifle and placed them on the counter. Arturo picked up the laser rifle first. 

"Hm, custom modifications, nice," he turned it over in his hands and looked through the sights, "Obviously you didn't do this yourself."

"A, uh, friend gave it to me," she said. 

"With the Brotherhood of Steel, I see," Arturo smiled and pointed at Paladin Danse's name on the bottom of the grip, "This one will keep you alive for sure." He set the laser rifle down and picked up the pistol. "This one, on the other hand..."

"What's wrong with it?"

"There's nothing _wrong_ with it, just could use some... personal touches." He looked it over carefully. "Expanded clip size, better grip, even a silencer." 

"Okay, well remember when I said I don't know if I have enough?" Lillian said. 

"Tell you what, you do a favour for me and I'll install a new mod for you plus give you some extra ammo."

"What kind of favour?" she asked. 

"I've got a letter that needs to be dropped off. A very important one. Needs to be dropped in a specific mailbox. I'm sure you could do that."

"All these years and there's still mail delivery? The postal service needs to update their slogan. 'Through rain or shine or nuclear apocalypse'." 

"So is it a deal?"

"Just one question."

"Yeah?"

"I know damn well there's no actual mail delivery any more, so who's the letter for?"

"I am not at liberty to say."

"I just want to know if I risk getting my face shot off." 

"Nah, you won't. Probably."

Lillian paused a moment. "Okay, Arturo. I'll do it."

"Good! I'll get started on modding your pistol. It'll take a short bit, if you don't mind waiting?"

"Nope, not at all," Lillian was about to leave, but turned back to Arturo, "Do you know where I can find the detective?"

"Nick Valentine? Around the corner in the alley behind here. Can't miss the neon lights."

"Thanks." Lillian started for the alley, followed by MacCready. 

"Hey, what did you mean you didn't have enough for ammo?" he asked, "You have more than enough, unless you're going on shopping sprees I'm not aware of?"

"I still need the caps for this Nick Valentine," she replied, "I still don't know how much it's going to cost."

"Oh, right."

They walked around the corner into the alley, passing by a pair of men working on an electrical panel. 

"Sometimes you gotta wonder. Does anyone fight back?" one of them said. "The Institute has to have enemies, right?"

"What, you mean the Railroad?" the other scoffed. "That's a fairy tale, man. They don't exist."

"Nah, I heard from my cousin. He knows a guy that works for 'em. Got a code phrase and everything. 'Follow the Freedom Trail'."

"The hell is that supposed to mean? You're full of it, and that kind of talk is going to get you snatched by the synths."

Lillian smirked to herself as they continued to Nick Valentine's office. She knocked before opening the door. "Hello?"

"Oh! Hi!" a young woman greeted them, "Can I help you?"

"Uh, yeah, I'm looking to hire the detective," said Lillian. 

"Ah, well he's out working a case right now, but if you'd like to leave your name, I can let him know you're looking to hire him."

"Lillian Parker. I'm... I'm looking for my missing baby."

"Oh, I'm so sorry," the woman said sympathetically, "When Nick returns, I'll have him get in touch with you as soon as possible. Do you have a place to stay here, or somewhere we can reach you?"

"Um, well when do you expect him back? I'll come back then."

"Not sure. Shouldn't be too long. A couple days at most." 

"Okay, thanks, uh.. sorry, I didn't get your name."

"Ellie Perkins."

"Okay, thanks, Ellie." Lillian turned and left with MacCready following. She leaned against the wall outside in the alley. 

"So. How much is the detective going to cost?" MacCready leaned on the wall next to her and crossed his arms. 

Lillian looked at him then back towards the office. "Oh, crap. Well, I guess I have a couple of days to get more caps. May as well try to keep ourselves busy."

"We should be back from dealing with Winlock and Barnes by then."

"Oh yeah, I almost forgot about that."

"Losing your mind already?" he grinned at her.

"I need a drink."

"Dugout Inn, it is." Lillian followed MacCready back to the marketplace where a large crowd had gathered. They sidled their way through and saw a man pointing a gun at another. 

"Don't move, synth!" the gunman shouted, "What have you done with the real Riley?"

"I swear, I'm not a synth!" the other man pleaded, his hands in the air, "Don't shoot! For God's sake, we're family!" 

A security guard stepped forward to intervene, raising his gun. "Put the gun down! Now!"

"He's a synth! He'll kill us all!" the gunman made a move and the guard shot him dead. The crowd gasped and jumped back. 

"Kyle! No!" the other man fell to his knees and crawled to the body of his brother. 

"Alright, show's over!" the guard turned to the crowd, "Everyone go home!" The crowd slowly dispersed. MacCready pulled at Lillian's arm to get her to follow, but she went over to Riley and crouched next to him. 

"Are you okay?" 

"I'm... I'm not a synth," he replied quietly, "I told him! I kept telling him! Why didn't he listen to me?"

"I'm sorry." She squeezed his shoulder before standing up and joining MacCready who just shook his head at her. "What?"

"You're too soft-hearted," he scoffed. 

"The man just lost his brother!" 

"A lot of people lose their families."

"It doesn't mean they can't grieve and I can't offer condolences," she glared at him, "What is with this damn place?" She followed him to the Dugout Inn, located in the visitors dugout of the stadium. She looked around once they were inside, impressed with how it looked. MacCready headed straight for the bar where the bartender was having a lively conversation with a patron. 

"So then I am crossing river, right?" the bartender said in a Russian accent, "Wearing nothing but a smile, when out comes the most dangerous of sea monsters - a MIRELURK."

"'A Mirelurk'"? The patron imitated his accent and scoffed in his normal voice, "Come on, that's like two out of ten points of danger. Tops."

"Vadim!" another Russian interrupted. 

"Oh, I forgot you were there, Yefim," sighed the bartender, "What do you want?"

"You know what? Never mind, I'll handle it myself," Yefim shook his head and walked away. 

"Vadim," MacCready greeted him, "Still killing people with your moonshine?"

Vadim chuckled and turned to MacCready. "MacCready! Is good to see you, tovarisch! How is Lucy? She still as beautiful as I remember?"

Lillian looked at MacCready who suddenly went quiet. "Oh, uh, she... she didn't make it, Vadim." 

"I'm sorry, mouth tends to be faster than brain," Vadim said, "Tell you what, I give you drink on the house. For old times."

"Thanks, Vadim. You were always a stand-up kind of guy. Let's drink."

"And you, lapochka?" Vadim turned to Lillian. 

"Oh, uh, just beer, please," she said. 

"Drink up!" he passed the beers to them. MacCready took his and found a table in the back. Lillian followed and sat across from him. They drank in silence for a few minutes before Lillian spoke up. 

"Who's Lucy?" She knew immediately it was the wrong question to ask as he glared at her. 

"Doesn't matter." 

"Okay." She drank her beer, trying not to watch MacCready quietly pick at the label on his. She knew she had touched a nerve, but she was curious about this Lucy. The tension was growing rapidly. 

"Um, so maybe..." she started. 

"Maybe what?" he snapped back. 

"Maybe we could stay here tonight, then we can practice shooting tomorrow?" she asked carefully. 

"Yeah, fine," he said shortly. 

She half-smiled and nodded, thankful that they wouldn't be out shooting today. "So, um, I guess I'll book a room here. Do you want to share or get separate rooms?"

"I don't care," he replied. 

Separate rooms, it is, she thought. Lillian approached the other man, Yefim. 

"Need a room?" he looked up from his newspaper. 

"Yeah. Two rooms, actually."

Yefim raised his eyebrow and looked past her towards MacCready. "Sure thing. 20 caps." Lillian handed over the money. "Rooms 1 and 2 are yours."

"Thanks." She looked back to MacCready who hadn't looked up from his beer. "Tell him to pick whichever room he wants." Yefim nodded. 

Lillian left the bar to get some air just as a security guard stormed up to her. "This your dog?" She looked down to see Canigou covered in mud and happy as could be.

"What have you been doing?" she asked the filthy German Shepherd.

"Oh, he was a having a grand old time rolling about in the brahmin pen and then trying to get down into Fallon's Basement. Becky would have us beheaded," the guard said angrily. 

"Sorry, I lost track of him," she apologised, "Is there somewhere I could wash him off?"

"Go ask Sheng Kowalski if you can clean your mutt off there," he waved his hand in the general direction of some shacks to the right before leaving. 

Lillian sighed and looked back down at Canigou. "Well, at least you're happy. But it's time for a bath." Canigou whimpered curiously. "I don't care if you don't like it, but you're certainly not sleeping indoors when you look like that. Come on." She headed towards where the guard had pointed. After asking another guard, she found Sheng Kowalski. 

"Water! Fresh water here!" a young boy cried out. 

"You Sheng?" Lillian asked. 

"That's right, you in the market for some fresh water? Because you've come to the right place!" Sheng said. 

"Um, actually, I need to give him a bath," she pointed down at Canigou who woofed happily. 

"Listen, lady, this water doesn't come free, you know. I got a business to run!"

"Can I just wash him in there?" She pointed at the pool of water surrounding the platform they were standing on. 

"And have him muck up my purifier?" he thumbed back at the large purifier behind his shack.

"Oh, come on, it's mostly mud which would be filtered out anyway. And I'll buy water after."

"How much water?" Sheng narrowed his eyes. 

"How much you selling it for?" 

"20 caps. But it's the best tasting water in the entire Commonwealth!"

"Alright. I'll take three. After my dog is bathed."

"You got a deal, lady."

Lillian led Canigou over to a ramp into the water. He stopped when he realised what she was trying to do. 

"Oh, come on, you were more than happy to go leaping in on your own," Lillian pleaded. 

Canigou looked up at her with those sad dog eyes, his ears drooping. 

"Nope. Not going to work on me. Get in." She tried pushing him, but he dug his paws into the grated platform. "Come on, Cani, just a quick wash and it'll be over." Canigou whimpered. "Oh, for god's sake." She tried picking him up, grabbing him under his front legs and walked him over to the water. Canigou lifted his hind legs to prevent them from touching the water, throwing Lillian off balance, and making them both tumble into the water. 

"FUCKING HELL!" Lillian yelled when she resurfaced. She grabbed Canigou before he could run out and started scrubbing the mud off him with her hands. The dog squirmed against her, but she held tight until she was satisfied he was clean of mud. He ran out as soon as she let go, shaking the excess water off. 

"Canigou, STAY." Lillian said firmly as she crawled out of the water. Canigou looked back at her, as if wondering why she was soaked. She glared back and sighed. "Dammit. I can't stay mad at you." She scratched him behind the ears and went around to Sheng who burst out laughing.

"That desperate for water, are you?" he grinned. 

"Here are your caps." 

Sheng handed her three cartons of purified water. "Come back soon!" he grinned. 

Lillian and Canigou left the platform, still soaking wet, and nearly bumped into MacCready who was carrying both of their packs. He looked both of them up and down, noting the puddles forming at their feet, before speaking.

"How?"

"You want a dog? One known owner, fair bit of mileage. No charge."

Canigou woofed happily. 

  
Later that night, after Lillian and Canigou waited outside in the sunlight to dry off as much as possible, they had turned in to their respective rooms. Canigou curled up on a worn rug in Lillian's room while she sat at the desk, not wanting to go to sleep just yet. So much has happened already and there wouldn't be time to rest just yet. She couldn't rest. Not when Shaun was still out there, waiting for his mommy to find him. 

She looked down at her Pipboy, which now had a map of the area. It wasn't too far to the Mass Pike Interchange. Afterward they could come back to Diamond City and see if Nick Valentine was back yet. Or they could go to Cambridge, check in on the police station. While she was fine with not seeing Rhys again, she did like talking to Haylen and Danse. And why stop there? They could continue back to Sanctuary, see if Clinton and his daughter, Charlie had made it. See if anyone else had moved in. See if Codsworth was still trying to trim the dead shrubbery. 

Lillian checked her pack again, making sure her newly modified pistol was still there. She had stopped in at Arturo's just before he closed up for the night and he had a good laugh when he found out why she was damp. He gave her a deal on ammunition for her pistol and laser rifle, saying that he liked her. She wasn't sure what he meant by that.

MacCready seemed to be in a better mood when they returned to the Dugout for the night, but they still opted to sleep separately. Lillian stood and stretched before crawling into bed. She already missed having someone next to her. She looked over at Canigou and quietly called to him, but he didn't move. He's had an eventful day and they all needed as much rest as possible before tomorrow. 


	9. Chapter 9

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lillian and MacCready take care of business. An emergency prompts a sudden return to the police station. Danse continues to have feelings which is very confusing.

  
They started out early the next morning, before the market had even opened. They detoured slightly so Lillian could drop off the mystery letter for Arturo. At least MacCready was in a better mood, like he hadn't been angry at Lillian the day before for asking about Lucy. They kept walking until they reached the train tracks. 

"Hold up," MacCready said, stopping and looking around, "Yeah, let's do some practice here. There are some bloatflies down that way we can shoot."

"Okay," Lillian removed her pack and told Canigou to guard it. 

"Right, so before we take shots at the flies, let me see how you can handle it now. Shoot that lower branch on the tree over there." MacCready pointed in the opposite direction at a dead tree. 

Lillian lifted the rifle and looked through the scope, lining the shot to the branch. She braced herself for the recoil, pulled the trigger, and... nothing. She frowned. She was sure she it was loaded. 

"Okay, so lesson number one - turn off the safety," MacCready chuckled. 

"I knew that," she said, flicking the safety switch. 

"Uh huh. Try again."

She aimed for the branch, pulled the trigger, and was nearly knocked off her feet by the recoil. "Damn, that's stronger than I remember."

"You need to adjust your stance. Feet a little further apart, that's it. Right foot a little further back. Good." He stood in front of her and turned her shoulders so they were more square to the ground. "Like that. See?" He pushed her shoulder and she barely moved. "Try again."

She tried again, shot the branch, and wasn't knocked off balance this time. "You know, when I learned to shoot a sniper rifle, we weren't standing. We were either lying prone, or kneeling."

"And you were shooting paper targets," MacCready smirked.

Lillian laughed. "Hey, those were dangerous! They could've given someone a paper cut!"

"Want to try shooting the flies?" Lillian nodded. "Okay, so long range shooting is a bit tricky. Sometimes you have to adjust for the wind and also try to predict where your target is going if they're in motion."

"Right." Lillian licked her finger and held it in the air. "Wind is coming westward, maybe 5 miles per hour."

"You learn that at military boot camp?"

"Nah, my granddad. He'd take me hunting when I was younger, but I'd use a bow and arrow. Much preferable over guns."

"Huh. Well, take your shot. Once you shoot, the flies will head our way."

Lillian aimed for one of the flies which was hovering. MacCready readied his rifle as well. She pulled the trigger and watched the bloatfly explode. Three others started flying towards them. She aimed again, trying to keep steady as she followed one of the flies. She took the shot, but missed. MacCready shot one of the others dead. She tried again to shoot another fly, but they were moving too fast for her to follow through the scope. Luckily for her, MacCready managed to calmly kill the others. 

"Well. I got one," she said proudly. 

"Heh, that you did. Maybe next time have one of your other guns on you," he nodded to her pack which Canigou was still sitting by. 

"Oh. Right."

"These are good for long range, but not so much when your targets get closer, so it's good to have a short range weapon on you."

"Okay. So should we continue on?" 

"Yeah, let's get those assholes."

  
It was a few more hours before they reached the Mass Pike Interchange. MacCready took out his binoculars for a look towards the overpass. 

"I can't see how many are up there, but there's a few down below over that way," he pointed to a small group of shacks on the ground under the overpass. 

"So, we take out the ones on the ground then head up?" Lillian asked, looking through her binoculars as well.

MacCready didn't answer for a moment. "No. There are only three there, but there are more on the overpass. If we take out the ground ones first, the others will be alerted and they have the advantage."

"So how do we get up there?"

"Over there," he pointed further down. "Looks to be a lift. Might not have too many people there."

"Okay," Lillian took a deep breath, "Let's do this."

"You sure?" MacCready put away his binoculars and turned to her. "You ready to kill people?"

She took another deep breath. "Yeah. If they're as bad as you say they are, then I guess they need to go."

"Okay, let's go."

She followed MacCready to the lift. They hid their packs under a nearby bush and told Canigou to guard. They crouched on the lift before MacCready pushed the button. It slowly rose to the overpass, much quieter than Lillian had expected. No one was waiting at the top, giving them a moment to get their bearings. They moved quietly up to a burnt-out car.

"Turret up ahead," MacCready said quietly, looking down the scope of his rifle, "There's probably a terminal nearby to deactivate it."

"Should we try that?" Lillian asked. 

"There's a good chance a Gunner is sitting at that terminal. Best option is to take the turret out, but it'll get the attention of the rest of the Gunners. You ready?"

"Yeah. I'm ready." She took a breath and aimed her rifle at the turret. She exhaled then pulled the trigger, breaking the turret into pieces. 

"Here they come," said MacCready. He took aim and shot at a few of the Gunners who appeared to see what had happened. As they hid, he ran to a break in the concrete barrier and crouched behind it. 

Lillian stayed where she was and looked down her scope. She spotted a Gunner peeking out from behind another barrier. She aimed and fired before the Gunner could hide again. Half of his face disappeared and she felt sick to her stomach. Another Gunner nearby fell to the ground as MacCready shot her dead. 

"Ah, dammit, assaultron!" MacCready shouted. Lillian looked and saw an assaultron running from around the corner. MacCready lobbed a grenade towards it, but it bounced off the road and over the side. "Crap!"

The assaultron halted and fired up its head laser towards MacCready who quickly scrambled behind the concrete barrier. Lillian huddled behind the burnt-out car, shielding her eyes from the blast of the laser. A moment later, she switched her sniper rifle for her laser rifle and peered out. The assaultron had its back to her which gave her the opportunity to fire a few shots at its legs. The assaultron staggered, but before it could do anything further, its head exploded. 

"Move up!" she heard MacCready yell out. She looked and ran forward to another concrete barrier. Her stomach lurched at the sight of the dead Gunners and she tried to ignore it. 

She took a quick look over the top of the barrier as a bullet hit it just inches away from her face. A tiny piece of the concrete broke off and hit her face. 

"Son of a bitch," she swore as she crawled to the side to see if she could look around that way. She spotted one of the Gunners in a makeshift shack, crouched behind a wall. It was either Winlock or Barnes, she recognised him from the Third Rail. She opted to keep using the laser rifle and crawled to another barrier. He seemed to be preoccupied with trying to locate MacCready, so she crawled a little closer. She shot Winlock/Barnes into a pile of ash. She wrinkled her nose and kept moving forward. 

She crawled through a ruined bus and saw MacCready taking shots at two more Gunners, one of whom was in power armour. A destroyed turret on a walkway above them was emitting sparks. Lillian crawled closer, positive they couldn't see her. She picked up an empty bottle and lobbed it towards the shack behind the Gunners. The one in power armour turned, giving her the opportunity to fire a shot at the fusion core. She missed, but MacCready must've figured out what she was trying to do and he quickly shot the fusion core causing the power armour to short circuit. Lillian then took a shot at the Gunner's head, killing him, as MacCready finished off the other one. 

There was a moment of silence before she spoke. "Is it done?" she called out. MacCready stood up and kicked at one of the bodies. He turned with a grin and gave her a thumbs up. "Should we take care of the ones on the ground?"

"Nah, they came up when they heard the shooting," he said as she approached, "Already taken care of. And nice job with the distraction."

"Thanks," she tried to look away from the dead bodies. 

"You okay?"

"Yeah, just... still getting used to this," she gestured to the bodies. 

"You're getting good at it."

"That's what scares me," she sighed, "I know this is the world now, but I'm afraid of getting to a point where I just won't care."

"Well, either way, thanks," MacCready made a move towards her, then decided against it. "This should get the Gunners off my back."

"Oh, I'm sure they've heard you loud and clear. Unless you now have a target on your head for taking out this whole spot."

"Pfft, there's nothing to worry about. I mean, with the way these lunatics act you'd think they'd try to hunt me down, but I know better."

"Well, if you're sure. Let's get out of here." Lillian turned to head back to the lift. 

"Hey, wait," MacCready grabbed her hand, "Um, I owe you big for this. I mean, you hired me but I dragged you out here."

"Don't worry about it," she smiled, "You needed the help."

"Yeah, well, I like to keep things nice and even, and you're one up on me," he paused for a moment, thinking. "Tell you what, I'll give back the caps you paid me in Goodneighbor. I'll still stick with you because that was the deal, but now we're even."

"That isn't necessary, but if you insist," she squeezed his hand. He squeezed back then let go. 

  
Canigou was still sitting by their packs. Lillian gave him a treat and picked up her pack. 

"Where to now, boss?" MacCready asked, kneeling down to pet Canigou. 

"Well, I wanted to go to Cambridge. Check in with the Brotherhood squad there."

"Sure thing." 

They walked in silence as the sun started to set and Lillian realised they were nearly back to the city. She had been too busy thinking about the people she just killed. Was it really necessary to kill all of them just because a couple of them gave MacCready a hard time? What if they had families somewhere? Was someone's kid about to get the news that their mom or dad was killed for seemingly no reason at all?

"Hey, you okay?" MacCready interrupted her thoughts.

"Hm? Yeah. Just thinking."

"You sure think a lot."

"Can't help it, sometimes it's the only way I can ensure an intelligent conversation."

"Wow. Thanks." 

"I didn't mean it like that. It's just that I understand things better if I work it out myself."

"Gotcha." 

They walked for a few more minutes when Canigou started growling. 

"What is it, boy?" Lillian asked him. They listened and didn't hear anything. They crept forward, Canigou still growling towards some houses to the right. 

"What's that? A sound?" a loud, gruff voice called out. 

"Super mutants," MacCready hissed at Lillian. He nodded towards the trees on the other side of the road and gestured for her to follow. 

"Canigou, come," she whispered loudly to her dog. But Canigou was still growling towards the houses. "Canigou! Here!" 

"I knew it!" A super mutant appeared from around the house, "Gonna tear you apart!" The mutant started shooting as Canigou barked and leapt towards it. 

"Shit!" Lillian fumbled with her laser rifle, panicking. MacCready shot the super mutant dead and they watched Canigou disappear behind the house. "Canigou!" Lillian yelled and ran after him. 

She turned the corner in time to see a mutant hit Canigou with its sledgehammer. Canigou cried out in pain as he skid across the road. Lillian saw only red as she opened fire on the remaining super mutants. When they were all reduced to piles of ash, she ran over to her dog who was writhing on the ground and whimpering. 

"Oh god, it's okay, boy," she pet him reassuringly, but looking worried at his mangled leg. 

"Aw, shit, I'm sorry," MacCready stood next to her, "Do you want me to... um..."

"To what?"

"Um.. take care of it?" he gripped his rifle slightly. 

"What? No!" she yelled. She dropped her laser rifle and removed her backpack, then carefully picked up Canigou. "Come on, we have to help him!" She ran back down the road, leaving a trail of blood from Canigou's broken leg. 

MacCready grabbed her laser rifle, picked up her pack, and tried to keep up with her. It was difficult, she was running so fast even though she was carrying a large dog. He followed her across the bridge and towards Cambridge. 

Knight Rhys entered the police station after his evening shift and yawned. 

"Anything to report, Knight?" Paladin Danse asked him. 

"No, sir," Rhys replied with a salute, "All is quiet."

"Good, I--" Danse was interrupted by the door bursting open. He and Rhys whipped out their laser pistols to see Lillian rush in, covered in blood, and holding her dog. 

"My dog's been hurt, please, I need help!" she cried. Haylen rushed in from her room. "Haylen, you have to help him!"

"I'm not a vet," Haylen said apologetically. 

"Please try!" Lillian begged.

Haylen looked over at Danse who nodded. "Do what you can."

"Alright, this way," Haylen led Lillian into one of the interrogation rooms where Canigou was set down gently on the table. He was still whimpering in pain. Lillian pet him as Haylen went to retrieve her medical supplies. 

"Sir, we need those supplies for us!" Rhys argued with Danse. 

"We'll figure something out," Danse looked towards the interrogation room, worried. Lillian's dog seemed to be in pretty bad shape and may not survive. But he could comfort her should that happen. Then she could stay and he can keep her safe. 

As Haylen returned to the room to start working on Canigou, the door opened again. Danse and Rhys aimed their weapon at this newcomer entering. 

"Jesus, this is where Lillian is, right? About yea high, red hair, carrying a gigantic dog like it weighed nothing?" the man panted. 

"Who are you? What are you doing here?" Danse demanded. 

"First off, you can get that thing out of my face," MacCready pointed at their guns, "Second, you can tell me where Lillian is."

"You did not answer my questions and you better answer them before I have you thrown out!" 

"I'm with Lillian and that's all you need to know!" MacCready shouted.

"Answer the damn questions, wastelander!" Rhys yelled. 

"Wastelander?! How about--"

"WOULD YOU ALL SHUT UP?" Lillian stormed into the lobby, startling them, "MY DOG MIGHT DIE AND THE LAST THING I WANT HIM TO HEAR IS YOU ASSHOLES SHOUTING, SO TAKE YOUR DICK-MEASURING CONTEST OUTSIDE!" She turned and rushed back to the interrogation-turned-surgery room before any of them could say anything. 

"You're going to let her talk to you like that?" Rhys asked Danse. 

"It's fine." Danse turned to MacCready. "I'm going to take your word that you are associated with Lillian, seeing as you're carrying her pack."

"Gosh, how generous," MacCready rolled his eyes. 

  
Nearly two hours later, Danse and MacCready were still glaring at each other from across the room, while Rhys stood nearby with his laser pistol. Haylen entered the lobby, covered in blood and wiping off her hands. 

"Well?" Danse took his eyes off MacCready. 

Haylen sighed. "I think he'll live. But I had to amputate his leg. It was too far gone to be fixed."

MacCready immediately picked up his and Lillian's packs and headed back. Danse felt a surge of jealousy rush through him. _He_ should be the one going to see Lillian, not some _mercenary_. 

"How is she?" he asked Haylen. 

"Upset, but relieved."

"And how much of our medical supplies did you waste on the mutt?" Rhys demanded. 

"She said she was going to bring us supplies to replace them and more," Haylen sat down on a chair, "And before you say anything, yes, I believe her."

Rhys scowled as Danse nodded and finally headed out to do his patrol. He wondered if Lillian was any closer to finding her son. Probably not if she was accompanied by such a miscreant. He knew their type, only helping in exchange for money or... other things. But surely she wouldn't sink so low. Maybe he should've made sure she had enough caps to get her by. He didn't think of it before. Dammit. 

The night was quiet, so when he went back inside, he got out of his power armour down in the motorpool. He didn't need to repair anything today, thank goodness. They were running low on supplies to repair his power armour. They couldn't fix his helmet, which had short circuited some time after he was blasted by the rocket engine at ArcJet. He tinkered with it a bit, but wasn't sure what else he could do. Haylen said it needed new wiring, which they didn't have. 

It was quiet when he headed upstairs to get something to drink. He looked into the lockup, as he had done ever since Lillian had left, only this time she was there again. She was asleep, holding Canigou close who was bandaged up and missing his front left leg. But that mercenary was there too, asleep behind Lillian and holding her like they were something more. Anger rose up and he left to the lobby. 

"Everything okay, sir?" Haylen asked, looking up from the book she was reading.

"Hm? Yes, fine," he replied, sitting down. 

Haylen stared at him for a moment. "They're just friends."

"What?"

"Lillian and MacCready. They're just friends." Haylen smiled slightly. 

"Fine. That's fine."

"Uh huh." Haylen didn't return to reading her book. 

" _What?_ " 

Haylen didn't say anything but smirked slightly as she looked back down at her book. "Nothing."

Danse narrowed his eyes, then decided to do his rounds again. He went downstairs, willing himself to not look in the lockup, and put his power armour on. He headed outside, wishing something would happen to keep his mind off Lillian and her... friend. He didn't trust this MacCready and he was sure Lillian had gotten herself into something she can't handle. 

He spent the rest of the night working out how to talk to her about making friends with more appropriate people and staying safe. First, he'd need to get her alone but he doubted she'd be willing to leave her dog. He returned back to the motorpool and there she was, sitting cross-legged on the floor with his power armour helmet in her lap. 

"Hi," she greeted him, looking up from the helmet. Her eyes were still red and puffy from crying. 

"You're up early," he said, getting out of his power armour. "What are you doing?"

"Haylen said your helmet hasn't worked since we got back from ArcJet," she picked up a small pair of pliers, "So I'm seeing what I can do." 

"She said we didn't have replacement wires," he frowned. 

"You don't need them," she said, leaning closer to the helmet. "Just need to redirect some of the wires that weren't fried."

"How do you know these things?" he leaned against the wall across from her, "I thought you were a dancer."

"Heh, my granddad insisted I learn," she looked up with a small smile, "My parents were quite wealthy and pretty much spoiled me. But my granddad taught me about electrics, plumbing, fixing cars, that sort of thing."

"But, why?"

"Probably to keep me grounded. When my parents had parties, my granddad couldn't stand their other wealthy friends while they talked about hiring people just to fix a leak or a blown fuse. So he taught me what he could so I could fix most things myself."

"Smart man."

"That he was," Lillian sighed and leaned back, "I miss him."

"Was he still..." Danse didn't want to finish asking. 

"Was he still alive when the bombs dropped?" she looked up at him, "Yes."

"Oh. I'm sorry." 

"Yeah," she looked back down at the helmet, then held it up. "Want to see if it works now?"

Danse took it and attached it to his power armour suit. He entered it and was surprised to see his helmet's hud light up. He exited the power armour with a smile. 

"You'll have to teach Haylen how to do that," he said. 

"It's just simple redirection," she smiled up at him. 

"So, um, how's your dog?"

"He's okay. Haylen did really well. He suffered a fair bit of blood loss, but hopefully it won't be too much of a problem. He hasn't gone into shock so we're hoping it'll sort itself out."

"Hopefully. I don't think human blood packs will work for dogs."

"Probably not." She stood up and stretched her arms towards the ceiling. 

_He pulled her in, holding her close. She hugged him tightly and kissed his cheek._

_"Please stay," he whispered, before kissing her._

_"I will," she kissed him back._

A whistle interrupted his thoughts. 

"Hello? You still with me?" Lillian waved her hand in front of his face. 

"Hm? Yeah, just... yeah." He could feel his face getting hot. 

"I'm going back upstairs," she yawned. 

"Wait! Um, that man you're with, how did you meet him?"

"Oh right, I haven't introduced you properly. MacCready, I hired him in Goodneighbor. Good thing, too, I still have a lot to learn out here."

"Hope he hasn't taken advantage of you."

"Nah, we've been splitting the payout from some jobs. Though he gave back the caps I paid because I helped him with a little problem."

"Problem? What kind of problem?" Danse demanded. 

"Gunners, just a few of them," she shuddered, "I'm still trying to get used to having to fight other people."

"Gunners? Are you okay? You weren't hurt, were you?"

"I'm fine," Lillian frowned slightly, "MacCready taught me some things about shooting. And your laser rifle has helped a lot too."

"Good. Don't want you getting hurt out there."

"Seems kind of inevitable, eh? Anyway, I'm going to try to get a bit of extra sleep." She smiled at him in a way that made his heart flutter and left the motorpool.

Dammit. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I kinda hate writing battle scenes and it's probably obvious. Sorry. Also sorry about Canigou/Dogmeat. He'll be fine, in case you're worried! Stay tuned! Merci beaucoup for taking time to read this! :D


	10. Chapter 10

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lillian and MacCready leave Cambridge Police Station with Canigou. They deal with situations at Drumlin Diner and in Concord.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, I struggled with this damn chapter for a month. Everything that I wanted to happen is here, but the writing is subpar. It's okay, but not ideal and I was just done with dealing with it. There is a good chance I will edit it later, but for now, here it is. Chapter 11 is already going so much better!

Danse couldn't rest, not with the thoughts he had been having. What was with that? He barely knew Lillian, hadn't even spent much time with her. Hell, even that damn mercenary has spent more time with her and it seems like they were getting cozy already. What did she even see in him anyway? 

He was so preoccupied with thinking up ways to discreetly dispose of the merc that he didn't notice when the man himself walked into the lobby. 

"Mornin'," MacCready yawned and stretched. Danse glared at him. "Hm? What was that? Oh, I'm fine, thanks, how are you?" Danse didn't reply. "Oh, that's a shame. I guess a stick up your ass would do that."

"What do you want?" Danse snapped. 

"So you DO speak," MacCready grinned, "Thought your type just grunted to communicate."

"I'll ask again. What. Do. You. Want?"

"I want to know what your problem is," MacCready sat across from him. 

"I don't have a problem."

"Uh huh," MacCready leaned back, "So that's why you keep trying to kill me with your thick mind? And what's-her-name, Haylen, says you keep trying to discreetly ask about Lillian."

"I'm just concerned about our recruit."

"You always take advantage of naive women like that?"

"What? No, of course not!" How could this degenerate even think he would do such a thing?

"Oh sure, poor helpless woman comes stumbling at your doorstep and you guys are like, 'Sure, come on in, by the way, join up!' and she does because she thinks it'll keep her safe."

"For your information, she didn't 'stumble in'. We were being attacked by ghouls and she and her dog helped fight them off," Danse said angrily. 

"Huh, couldn't do it yourself?" MacCready smirked, "Big ol' Brotherhood couldn't handle a few tiny ghouls?"

Danse slammed his fists on the table and stood up quickly, knocking his chair over. MacCready jumped up, nearly tripping over his own chair. Before either one could do anything, Haylen returned from outside. She looked between the two men glaring at each other before speaking. 

"Getting on well, are we?" 

"Who is?" Lillian entered the room with Canigou limping slowly behind her. "Oh."

"How's Canigou?" Haylen asked. 

"Seems okay, still in pain," Lillian reached down to scratch his ears, "I gave him a small dose of med-x, but I didn't want to give too much."

"That should be okay." Haylen looked over at Danse and MacCready who were still staring each other down and shook her head as she went into her room. 

"You two done?" Lillian asked them. 

"How's your dog?" Danse asked without breaking eye contact with MacCready. 

"Fine. So what's happening here?"

"Lover's spat!" Haylen shouted from the other room. Danse and MacCready finally looked away from each other. 

"Ah. Should I come back later?" Lillian grinned at them. 

"How long will you be staying?" Danse asked. 

"We're heading out today," she replied, "I want to get Canigou up to Sanctuary where there will be a very happy girl ready to help take care of him."

"Oh," he tried not to sound too disappointed. 

"And I need to get some more stimpaks and med-x for you to replace the ones we used."

"That isn't necessary."

"Of course it is," she paused as Rhys came in from his patrol and glared at her, "Besides, eventually _his_ nasty looks are going to kill me." She nodded towards Rhys as MacCready smirked. 

"I don't know why the Paladin lets you get away with talk like that," Rhys sneered. 

"I don't know why they let you get away with a face like that," MacCready retorted. 

"Okay, that's enough," Lillian spoke up before Danse could, "Anyway, we'll start getting ready to head out."

"Are you sure? Maybe your dog needs more time to rest before walking all that way." Danse tried not to sound desperate for her to stay. 

"I'm going to carry him. I've made up a harness to make it easier." 

"Wait, when did you do that?" asked MacCready. 

"Just after you came out here. There were some old police vests in the storage, which, Paladin, I hope you don't mind my taking," she looked over at Danse who shook his head. "I looped some belts through them and I can carry Canigou like a tote bag." 

MacCready smirked. "Hah, I can't wait to see that." 

"Wait, why should you carry him? Shouldn't he carry the dog?" Danse nodded towards MacCready. 

"Mac's better with a gun than I am, and he'll need to be able to shoot without a dog burdening him."

"Makes sense," MacCready nodded in agreement, "Wasn't looking forward to carrying your mutt around anyway."

"Shut up," Lillian joked with a small smile to MacCready. Jealousy started to rise in Danse again. 

"You know, you could leave the dog here," Danse said slowly. 

Lillian frowned slightly. "You're running low on supplies as it is. Besides, I promised to bring a dog back to Sanctuary for a little girl I met, as I mentioned a few minutes ago."

"Oh. Right. Of course." Danse tried not to sound disappointed. He had thought that if Canigou stayed, then Lillian would come around more often to check in on him. "So, have you had a chance to look into that task I gave you?"

"No, not yet. I haven't been anywhere near Malden or the airport, nor have I heard any distress signals."

"What's that?" MacCready asked. 

"Oh, it's a missing Brotherhood patrol. Came in three years ago, haven't been heard from since."

MacCready turned to Danse. "And you think they're still sitting about, waiting to be found?" he scoffed. 

"We know it's a long shot, but I said I'd still look into it if I can," Lillian said, "At the very least, get some closure for family and friends."

"Malden, huh?" MacCready looked deep in thought, "Well. I suppose we could stop by, see what's what. We'll have to be careful. The area's crawling with ferals."

"Damn." Lillian looked down at Canigou who was lying on the floor, whimpering softly. "Don't suppose you can still take down ferals with one less leg, huh?" Canigou whined loudly. "Didn't think so. Well, let's go get ready."

  
Less than an hour later, MacCready helped Lillian adjust Canigou so she could carry him on her back. They had divided their supplies between their backpacks so now MacCready was carrying most of it while Lillian could carry her pack in front while still having enough movement to use her pistol. They said goodbye to Haylen, while promising to send along extra supplies with a caravan if they could.

"See you later, Rhys," Lillian said as Rhys walked past. He ignored her. "What was that? Oh gosh, I know, it'll be so AWFUL around here without me. Don't worry, I'll be back as soon as I can." She jokingly blew him a kiss and he scowled. 

"What a charmer," said MacCready as they left the police station. 

Paladin Danse was outside in his power armour, waiting. 

"We'll be back when we can, Paladin," she said. 

"Be careful out there. Stay safe."

"Always." She smiled up at him and his heart fluttered. 

"Later, Tin Can," MacCready mock saluted him. 

"If anything happens to her, I will hold you responsible," Danse said tersely. 

"Yeah, yeah," MacCready waved him off and followed Lillian out the front gate. 

Goddamn mercenaries.

  
"Damn, that guy has a serious crush on you," MacCready said once they had reached the road. 

"Who, Danse?" 

"Well it certainly isn't the other one," he smirked. 

"Huh."

"Oh come on, it's so obvious. Even Haylen said so."

Lillian scoffed. "I'm sure he has more important things on his mind."

"You should do the poor guy a favour and let him take you on a date or something."

"Tch, I don't have time for that," Lillian rolled her eyes, "Besides, I don't think I can."

"Why not? Oh... because of your husband, right?" Lillian nodded. "Sorry. I forgot. Forget I said anything."

"It's okay. I mean, Danse is nice and all." MacCready let out a burst of laughter. "Shut up, he is! I mean, he's nice to me. But he's not Nate. And I don't think I could get personally involved with anyone in the military again."

"He is pretty intense."

"No, it's just... I've hated the military since things were going to shit back before the war started. And then they took over the Opera House where I danced, forcing all of us to find other jobs. I've even gotten arrested for participating in protests."

"No shi-, uh, no kidding. You were arrested? Damn, never thought you had it in you."

"Heh, yeah. I was nearly kicked out of college for it, but one of the professors pointed out that if I was so passionate about this, imagine how hard I'd fight to win any of my cases."

"Thought you didn't do those type of cases."

"That was in my first semester when I was mostly doing Law 101. I started focusing on property law in my second year."

They continued on in silence, continuously watching for trouble. As they approached Lexington, Lillian tensed up. 

"Hold on, I was shot at from the roof of the Corvega plant there," she pointed. MacCready nodded and he brought his rifle up to look through the scope. 

"Not seeing anyone now, so let's just hurry along," he said after a few minutes, lowering his rifle. 

"When I first got here, there was an explosion in the middle of town. And things running. Oh! I think they were ferals, only I didn't know that at the time." 

"I haven't been this far north here. Is Sanctuary far?"

"North of Concord, we still have a little ways to go. We can stop for a rest at the house where I met Charlie and Clinton."

"Who?"

"Oh, Clinton and his daughter, Charlie. I stayed with them while they were temporarily occupying a house up here. I offered them a place to live at Sanctuary since he said they couldn't find anywhere else."

MacCready sighed. "You really are very trusting, aren't you?" 

"What do you mean by that?"

"How do you know you aren't going to get home and find the place completely looted?"

"Oh. Well, I mean, he has a young daughter and he seemed pretty concerned to find a place to live."

"You'd be surprised at how many people will use their own kids as a way to gain sympathy in order to rob you. Or murder you."

"I don't think they're like that," Lillian said, but was now unsure. Had she been duped? Was she going to go back home and find Codsworth smashed to pieces and her own home torn apart?

"This the place?" MacCready pointed to the house just off the road. Lillian nodded. They found the house empty and took off their packs. Lillian let Canigou down and he hobbled around, still trying to get used to being one leg short. She stretched against the wall before settling down on the floor. 

"So. Question." MacCready passed her some dried meat. "I know you're trying to find your son and all, but why did you join the Brotherhood when it's just those three? Especially since you hate the military."

Lillian sighed. "It seemed like my best option at the time. You got a better idea?"

"Well, that detective in Diamond City will probably get more done."

"Yeah," she sighed again. "So after we bring Canigou to Sanctuary, we'll go back and see if he's in." 

"Do we have to stop at the police station again?"

"Not if you don't want to," she smiled, "I got the feeling you weren't exactly becoming best friends with Danse and Rhys."

"Haylen's nice."

"Yeah, she is. Interested in someone else, though, in case you're wondering."

"Oh. Well, that's fine. I'm not really interested anyway."

"So do you have anyone special waiting for you somewhere?"

"Ye- no. Not really."

"Really? No one?"

MacCready shrugged and frowned, so she decided not to press the matter. She did wonder about him. He knew a fair bit about her, but she knew almost nothing about him in return. She knew a bit from his childhood and that he ran with the Gunners for a while, but nothing more personal. 

They were back on the road half an hour later. Apart from a few words exchanged about Canigou's well-being, they were quiet. It wasn't until they reached a diner when the silence was broken. 

"We had a deal, Trudy!" a rough voice called out, "Hand over the goods! You owe us!" 

"I ain't giving you poison-shilling chem pushers anything!" a woman's voice yelled from inside the diner. 'You know what that junk has done to my boy?"

Lillian looked back at MacCready who sighed and shook his head. "You're not going to get involved, are you?"

"Let's just see what's happening," she replied, "Maybe we can help."

"Dammit," he said under his breath and followed Lillian to the diner. 

"Whoa, whoa, easy there, scavver," the man in leather armour suddenly turned and held his gun up along with a woman in similar armour, "This doesn't concern you."

"Ugh, I'm calling it right here, this world can officially bite my ass," Lillian scoffed. 

The man lowered his gun, confused. "Yeah, well, we all got our problems. I'm just trying to collect what's owed to me."

"Well, maybe I can talk to her, see what we can do to solve this," she said. 

"Be my guest," the man joined his female companion and gestured to the diner. 

Lillian went up to the diner door where a woman in a flannel shirt and jeans was waiting and glaring. 

"I saw you talking to them," she said, "And that bastard ain't getting a damn cap out of me."

"What's this about anyway?"

"Oh, he didn't tell you? He got my boy hooked on Jet, sold him a ton of junk on 'credit' and now expects me to pay him off." She looked behind at her teenage son, rocking back and forth on the floor and sighed. "We don't have that kind of money."

"Hmm, could you make a deal in some other way? Like, maybe you have some things they need, like food or stimpaks?"

"I don't know," Trudy narrowed her eyes, "All they really want is caps. If I were able to open up shop again, I could make some caps."

Lillian looked back out towards Wolfgang and his companion. "I have an idea, just hold on." She went back outside. 

"Well? We getting our caps or what?" demanded Wolfgang. 

"Not exactly, but listen, they can't afford to pay you right now."

"They owe me and I'm getting paid one way or another!"

"Wait! How about this, you two stick around as guards so she can open her trading shop again, and you get a percentage. What do you say?"

Wolfgang turned to his companion who shrugged. "And Trudy's on board with this?"

"Not quite, I wanted to run it by you first."

"I guess it's better than nothin'."

"Okay, I'll let Trudy know." 

"Well? He gonna leave my boy alone?" Trudy asked when Lillian returned. 

"So here's the deal. You can open up shop and they'll be your guards in exchange for a bit of the profits."

Trudy sighed. "Fine. Not like I have much choice, do I?" She looked past Lillian out to Wolfgang. "You hear that? You'll get your damn money, but I better not catch you selling chems to my boy again!"

"Fine by me, Trudy! Your son's broke as shit anyhow!"

"Well, guess I'm open for business again, you may as well have a look," Trudy returned to her counter. 

"It's only fair, right?" Lillian bought some tins of dog food and some extra ammo. She was about to head out, but suddenly turned back. "Oh! I almost forgot, can I arrange to have some chems delivered to the police station in Cambridge?"

"I'm not sure when the next caravan will be by or where they're going," said Trudy, "But I'll see what I can do."

"I can't afford too much right now, but every little bit helps," Lillian bought a few stimpaks and Med-X to send on. "Bear with me for a moment, just going to write a quick note." She removed her backpack to take out a notebook and pen. 

"So, I have to ask," Trudy leaned forward on her counter, "Why are you carrying the dog?"

"He had to have his leg amputated," Lillian turned to show her, "He's still hurting and still needs to get used to it. Carrying him is easier and faster right now."

"Huh."

Lillian wrote what turned into two page letter to Danse and folded it into the pouch Trudy had put the chems in. She thanked Trudy then headed back out with MacCready. 

"Well, that went better than I thought it would," said MacCready. 

"You can get pretty far if you talk things out instead of trying to shoot everyone in the face."

"Except the Gunners."

"Yes, except them. They weren't exactly ready to talk when we rolled in." 

MacCready chuckled a bit and gave Canigou a quick pat before taking his place behind them. It wasn't too long before they reached Concord and could hear gunfire. 

"Hey, can you have a look to see what's happening?" Lillian looked back at him. "Last time I was here there was something going on, but we just passed by."

MacCready nodded and crept closer into town. Lillian followed but stopped near the ruined church and readied her pistol. Canigou growled and she reached behind to reassure him. She considered removing her backpack and Canigou, but preferred to keep him close. The thought of being separated from her dog made her feel panicked. 

She watched MacCready crouch at the corner of the building and peer around the corner. The gunfire was interrupted by a tremendous roar and a mangled body flew past MacCready and landed at the steps of the museum. Against her instincts, Lillian rushed to MacCready. 

"What the hell was that?" she asked in a loud whisper. 

"Deathclaw," he replied. 

"What?" 

MacCready gestured for her to crouch and pointed around the corner. She looked around and saw what could only be described as a strange dinosaur with horns tearing a raider in half. 

"What the fuck!" she shouted. The deathclaw looked their way, roared, and ran towards them, the ground shaking with each step. MacCready grabbed Lillian's arm, pulled her into the building they were crouched by, and hid behind the counter. He held his hand over Lillian's mouth to keep her from shouting again, while she tried to keep Canigou from growling.

The deathclaw prowled around the open door and broken windows, but couldn't find a way in. It swiped some dirt through the windows, causing them to cough. The deathclaw roared again and tried to force itself through the doorway. Lillian pulled Canigou close and buried her face in his fur. MacCready shot at it over the counter, but it only seemed to get angrier. 

The sound of a laser rifle was fired from somewhere outside, distracting the deathclaw away from them. MacCready took advantage and fired more shots. Lillian couldn't bring herself to help, instead holding Canigou for comfort. Between MacCready and the mystery shooter outside, the deathclaw finally fell dead to the ground. 

"You okay?" MacCready turned back to Lillian, who still had her face buried in Canigou's fur. 

She nodded without looking up. 

"You sure?"

"No," she sniffled and looked up, her eyes red from crying, "Where the hell did THAT come from?" She gestured angrily towards the door. "Like, how is it a THING? I've seen giant flies and giant roaches, but what the hell did THAT evolve from?"

"Huh, I don't know," MacCready crouched next to her, "They've just always been around for as long as I can remember. Never thought about what they could have been before."

"Jesus, what the hell else is out there?"

"I'm going to be honest, deathclaws are probably the worst of the worst," he leaned forward and gently wiped a tear from her cheek. "If you see one, it's best to turn and get as much distance away from it as possible."

"Fuck's sake," she leaned back against the wall and closed her eyes. Canigou rested his head on her lap, not being able to move much from his place beside her. She opened her eyes and patted him on the head. "Oh, Cani, I bet you would've tried to bite that deathclaw's leg off, huh?" Canigou woofed quietly.

"Not to ruin the thought, but if a deathclaw got at him, he'd be lunch," MacCready said with a small chuckle. 

"Yeah, you're probably right," Lillian slowly stood up, taking care with moving Canigou behind her. 

"Isn't he getting heavy?" 

"Just a little, but I'll manage," she patted her dog with a smile. 

"I guess you prefer to keep him close."

"Yeah."

"Okay. So. Want to see a dead deathclaw?"

Lillian followed MacCready outside where the deathclaw lay dead. She wrinkled her nose as she got a closer look. What did it used to be? She toed its leg which had no give. 

"Hey! Up here!" a voice called out. They looked up to see a black man standing on the balcony of the Museum of Freedom. "We could use some help!"

"What sort of help?" Lillian asked. 

"Food! Please, we've been stuck in here for ages," the man was clearly desperate. 

"Of course, we have a bit to spare," Lillian nodded at MacCready. 

"He helped bring the deathclaw down," MacCready pulled off his pack and dug into it, "Looks like one of those Minutemen types, shouldn't be too bad."

"Minutemen?"

"Yeah, bunch of do-gooders," MacCready pulled out some tins of pork and beans, "Well, they were. Heard some sh- er, some stuff went down within their ranks."

"Oh." 

"Anyway, we better get this up to them."

"Look at you, being all charitable," she elbowed him with jest. They went into the museum where they were met the man from the balcony. 

"Am I ever glad to meet a friendly face," he greeted them, "Preston Garvey, Commonwealth Minutemen."

"Nice to meet you," Lillian shook his hand, "Lillian Parker, and this is, uh," she turned to MacCready, "I just realised, I don't know your first name."

"Oh, I'm so used to people calling me MacCready," he said, "It's Robert. Or RJ. But I prefer just MacCready."

"Well then. This is just MacCready."

"And this is food for you," MacCready held out the tins. "I hope it'll be enough."

Preston sighed. "It will be now. If it were a couple weeks ago, it wouldn't have been." He paused. "We started out with twenty, but now there's only five of us."

"What happened?" asked Lillian. 

"If you don't mind, I'd like to get this food up to what's left of us," Preston said apologetically. She nodded and they followed Preston through the museum and up to a room on the third floor. There were four others inside, two young men, a young woman, and an older woman laying on a ragged sofa. Canigou woofed softly at the woman. 

"Ah, Dogmeat, I knew you'd find someone for us," the old woman said weakly. 

"Dogmeat?" Lillian looked down at the dog, then crouched down to remove the straps from him. He wobbled a little then limped over to the old woman and licked her face. "Oh, so he's your dog?"

"Oh, no, he ain't my dog. He's what you'd call his own man." She paused as the young man in overalls helped her to sit up and gave her a tin of pork and beans. "What's this? I tell you, I need something else."

"No, Mama Murphy, no more of that junk," Preston said sternly. 

"Aw, Preston, we're all going to die eventually, and we're gonna need the Sight." She turned to Lillian. "And our friend, she's going to need it too."

"The Sight?" Lillian asked. 

Preston sighed. "Mama Murphy, she... uh... she has these visions, I guess. She used it to get us out of Quincy, and she used it to tell us of somewhere we can go. Where we can finally be safe."

The other woman in the room scoffed. "So now we're just going somewhere that probably doesn't exist because Mama Murphy 'saw it' while being stoned off her gourd?"

"Well, Marcy, you have a better idea?" the man in overalls asked. "Anybody?" No one replied. "Well then, Sanctuary Hills it is."

"Wait, you're going to Sanctuary?" Lillian asked. 

"See? The Sight hasn't failed us yet," Mama Murphy said with a smile. 

"You know it?" asked Preston.

"Yeah, I live there."

"Ha! Our luck is finally turning!" Preston said cheerfully, "We'll head out as soon as you're all ready." 


	11. Chapter 11

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lillian and MacCready spend some time in Sanctuary. MacCready has another favour to ask Lillian.

The walk back to Sanctuary was quiet. Preston told Lillian a little bit about the others in their group. Marcy and Jun Long, a married couple who had their own shop back in Quincy; Sturges, the mechanic; and Mama Murphy. Lillian noticed he hesitated when he brought up Quincy and figured something awful must've happened there. Maybe it had something to do with what MacCready told her, that some shit had gone down within their ranks. 

When they arrived in Sanctuary, it was early evening. At first it seemed empty but Codsworth floated down the road toward them. 

"Ah! Miss Lillian! Welcome back!" he greeted her, "I see you have found some assistance?"

"Yes, Codsworth, I made a few new friends," she said. "Is there anyone else here?"

"Why yes, a Mr. Clinton says you invited him and his daughter to live here."

"Oh good," she smiled. "Could you help these people get settled? They've had a bit of a difficult time and the less they have to worry about right now, the better." 

"Of course, mum!" 

She turned to Preston and his group. "So Codsworth here will help you get sorted. Most of the houses are okay, but my house is off limits, as well as whichever one Clinton and Charlie chose."

"Oh, anything will be fine, dear," Mama Murphy said as she caught up to the group, "So long as I can sit down somewhere. My feet are killing me."

Lillian crouched down to let Canigou out of his makeshift harness. She gave him a small dose of Med-X just as Charlie came running down the road. 

"Lillian! You came back!" she shouted. "Oh no, what happened to Canigou?" She skid to a stop as she noticed the dog was missing a leg. 

"He was attacked and we unfortunately had to amputate his leg. He's doing okay, but I need someone to look after him here."

"Me?" Charlie knelt next to Canigou to get a closer look at his bandaged stump. 

"Yep. I think he belongs to all of us now and I think you'll do a good job of looking after him," Lillian smiled down at her. 

"I'll do my best!" 

"Good! So which house did you and your dad choose? We have more people moving in."

"Oh, the one next to yours," Charlie looked down at her hands as if trying to figure out which was which, "The one on the left." She pointed with her left hand. 

"Okay, good. Where's your dad?"

"Oh! He's been working in the garden! He got some tato and melon plants from a farm."

"Wow, that's great!" 

"We did, um, go into your house, sorry," Charlie said apologetically, "But Dad wanted to see if there was anything we could fix up for you in there and Codsworth let us. "

"So was there anything to fix?"

"We made you a bed! That was all we did, but we hope you like it!"

"Aw, thank you so much, sweetie. I'm going to go talk to your dad, then I'll give you a few things for Canigou."

"Canigou? Is that what you've named him?" Mama Murphy interrupted, "I always knew him as Dogmeat."

"Dogmeat? That's a weird name for a dog," Charlie said. 

"Well you know, I like your name better," Mama Murphy smiled warmly as Canigou woofed, "And it sounds like he agrees." 

Lillian and MacCready continued down the road to her house. She stopped in front of it and sighed. 

  
_"A house?"_

_"Yep."_

_"Like, a whole house?"_

_"No, it's just a pile of wood. Some assembly required. Of course a whole house!"_

_"Damn, I knew your parents were rich, but... damn."_

_"I could always tell them we don't need it," Lillian elbowed Nate in jest._

_"No! No, it's just... wow. Most people are lucky to get a toaster for a wedding present these days," Nate sighed._

_"Way to make me feel guilty."_

_"I didn't mean it like that. I know that we have all this privilege and sometimes it feels like there's not enough we can do to help other people. I always see long lines at ration centres, and yet we can just walk into the supermarket and buy just about anything we want."_

_"We're on rations too."_

_"And we still get more than actual families. It's just the two of us, Lilli, and our allotted rations could feed a whole family. And you know as well as I do that we get more simply because of how well off we are."_

_"It's not my fault!"_

_"I'm not saying that. It's just unfair, you know? You were well off before all this happened, and I wasn't doing too bad either. But there are others out there who struggled before and now the government's giving them even less."_

_"So you want to give them our rations?"_

_"Well, not ALL of them. We still have to eat too. But surely we can give some to someone with a family."_

_"I suppose."_

_"Are you upset?"_

_"No," Lillian said, "Okay, maybe just a little. I wanted to celebrate us getting a house, but then you had to go and make me feel guilty."_

_"Well, I mean, we shouldn't let ourselves get carried away," Nate put his arm around her, "Anyway, let's go see this new house."_

  
"You okay?" MacCready asked. 

"Yeah, just remembering when we got the house," she replied. "My parents got us this huge house as a wedding present, but Nate pointed out that we didn't need all that space since it was just the two of us."

"Wait, you had something bigger than this?" MacCready gestured to the one-level bungalow. 

"Yep."

"Geez, did your family own half the state?"

"Ha, no. My parents had their own construction business. Built it from the ground up before I was born. So I was kinda spoiled as a kid."

"Must've been nice."

"Yeah," she sighed. 

"It wasn't?"

"No, it was nice, but I didn't have to worry about anything," she said. "Like, I didn't have to worry about where my next meal was coming from, or whether my parents would still have a job at the end of the week. I didn't even know that happened to other people. But Nate knew. It was our first real argument."

"You argued because you had it better than others?"

"Pretty much. But we talked it out and we ended up declining the larger house in exchange for this one," she led MacCready to the front door, "Far more suitable for two people."

"Even though you had a baby."

"Not yet. And Shaun was, well, a surprise. We had discussed having kids, but figured we'd wait. But I guess fate had other plans." 

"I know the feeling."

"What?"

"Oh, uh, nothing," MacCready looked at the door, "So you lived here, huh?"

Lillian narrowed her eyes slightly. "Yeah." She opened the door and they went in. "So we can stay here tonight, then head back to Diamond City in the morning. Um, do you mind sleeping out here on the couch?"

"Sure," MacCready tossed his pack on the ragged couch. 

"Unless you want to find another bed. Codsworth and I made what we could before I left."

"No, this is fine." 

"Our, I mean, my room's just down the hall here," she headed down the hall with MacCready following. She opened the door and smiled when she saw the bed. Gone was the old wooden cot and in its place was a basic bedframe that looked very similar to the one she and Nate shared before the bombs dropped. 

"Wow, that girl's dad made this?" MacCready ran his hand across the headboard as Lillian sat down. 

"So not quite the type to loot the place and murder us all, huh?"

"Yeah, yeah, you got lucky." He sat next to Lillian. "So, you sure you want to sleep in here alone?" He waggled his eyebrows jokingly at her. 

She elbowed him hard. "Shut up, the couch is your spot."

"I know, I know," he laughed and stood up, his face turning more serious. "This is yours and your husband's place. I get it. I'm more than fine with the couch."

"Thanks." She stood and looked across the hall. "This is Shaun's room." She put her hand on the doorknob, but didn't turn it. She didn't move for a minute.

"Hey, it's okay," MacCready put his hand on her shoulder. 

"We were going to go to the park. It was sunny out and warm for October. But then we heard on the news of nuclear detonations in Pennsylvania and then in New York. Nate had Shaun and we ran up the hill to the vault. The bomb hit as we were going down."

MacCready didn't say anything but put his arms around her from behind. She didn't react at first, then put her hands on his forearms and leaned her head toward his. They stayed like that for a few moments before she pulled away and turned to him. 

"Thank you." She looked at the closed door and went back to the living room. "Anyway, I need to go talk to Clinton."

"Sure."

They left the house and found Clinton near the ruined playground, tending to a number of crops. Lillian was impressed. 

"Well, hey there," Clinton greeted her and MacCready with a smile, "I don't know how I can ever thank you for letting Charlie and me live here."

"Just knowing you're both safe is good enough for me," said Lillian, "And thank you so much for the bed. It looks amazing." 

"We wanted to do something for you, and that robot let us into your place so we could fix up a few things. We didn't touch anything that seemed important," he added. 

"I appreciate it. We have more people here now."

"So I see. The tatoes and melons are doing pretty well, but with more people we might need to get some more plants."

"Anything I can do?"

"Abernathy Farm is just over there," he pointed to some hills just west of the Red Rocket, "I got these from them and they'll probably sell us more."

"Nice people?"

"A bit stand-offish, but they won't shoot you right away." 

"So downright saints, got it," said Lillian with a smile, "I've given Charlie a new job."

"Oh?"

"My dog was injured and needed his leg amputated. He's still trying to get used to it, so I told her she can look after him."

"I bet she's over the moon about that," he smiled, "She kept talking about how nice your dog was on our way here."

"I know he's in good hands. So is there anything else you need?"

"Oh, we have everything we could ask for here. Thank you."

Lillian turned and was promptly greeted by Preston Garvey. 

"Hi, nice place Mama Murphy found for us, huh?"

Lillian frowned slightly. "Yeah, she sure did." 

"Lillian found it long before any of you," MacCready smirked. 

"Oh, right, you've already been living here for a bit. Well I'm sure you wouldn't mind helping out around here."

Lillian and MacCready looked at each other. "I can do a bit, but I have some other things to do."

"Yeah, it's not like she has a kidnapped son to find or anything," MacCready said sarcastically. 

"Your son was kidnapped?"

"Yeah. While I was frozen in the vault."

"Hold up, what?"

"My family was frozen in these cryogenic pods in the vault, up the hill over there," she pointed towards the vault, "My husband was murdered and my baby boy was taken, but there was nothing I could do because I was still locked in my pod." Lillian bit her lip to fight back the tears that started stinging her eyes. 

"Oh. Damn. Well, if there's anything I can do to help."

"Thanks."

"Anyway, I better make sure we're getting settled in. Oh, and talk to Sturges if you want to help out." Preston turned and walked away. 

MacCready let out a burst of air. "The nerve of that guy. This is your damn home and he just walks in like he's the boss?"

Lillian didn't reply. 

"'Oh, your baby was kidnapped? Darn, better help us out here.'" MacCready said sarcastically. 

"I mean, they have had a hard time," she said quietly. 

"Well so have you," he grabbed her hand to turn her towards him, "Listen, what they've been through? There are a lot of people like that out here. Being forced out of their homes, nearly starving, it's normal out here. But you? No one else has been through what you have. You're probably the only person from before the war who is not a ghoul. The ghouls have had two hundred years to adjust, but you've been out here for barely two weeks."

"Yeah, but--"

"You can't save everyone. Your priority is finding your son. These people are capable of helping themselves."

Lillian didn't say anything, but nodded. She squeezed his hand and they headed back to her house. She bid him goodnight, went to her room, and shut the door. 

  
_"Lilli."_

_"Hm?"_

_"Lilli, wake up."_

_Lillian woke up to see Nate sitting on the bed. "Nate! You're alive!"_

_"What are you doing here?"_

_"I was sleeping."_

_"How can you find our son if you're sleeping here?"_

_"I'm trying!"_

_"Are you really? Seems like you're trying to avoid finding Shaun."_

_"I'm not!"_

_"You're back here instead of being out there looking for Shaun."_

_"I have to wait for the detective."_

_"What do you need a detective for? Just find Shaun yourself!"_

_"I don't know where to start!"_

_"What about that man you've spending time with? Isn't he helping? Or are you trying to replace me?"_

_"No, it's nothing like that. He is helping!"_

_"If you say so." Nate stood. "I suppose it's only fair you move on."_

_"But I can't move on, I need you."_

_"Clearly not."_

_"Nate, please. Why are you being like this?"_

_"Just... find Shaun." Nate walked out of the room._

"Wait!" Lillian sat up quickly. The room was empty and cold. She pushed off the blanket and wrenched the door open. She ran into Shaun's room and looked in the crib. She gripped the side until her knuckles turned white and let out a wail of despair. 

Suddenly she was grabbed from behind. She started punching them, but MacCready got hold of her arms tightly. 

"Lillian, stop! Stop, it's me."

Her vision seemed to clear and saw MacCready's worried face. She broke down sobbing as he pulled her in and held her close. She cried into his shoulder as he rubbed her back. 

"Sorry," she sniffled as she pulled away, seeing the large wet spot on his shirt. 

"It's fine." He gently wiped away the tears on her face with his thumbs. "Let's go back to sleep."

She nodded as he put his arm around her and led her out. She stopped in the hallway. 

"No, not there." 

MacCready nodded and they went into the living room. They sat on the couch and she curled up against him. He wrapped a blanket around her and waited for her to fall asleep. 

  
When Lillian woke up, she snuggled closer to the warm body beneath her. The rhythmic rising of his chest was comforting. She lay there with her eyes closed for a few moments before realising where she was. She opened her eyes and found herself lying on top of MacCready. Before she could move, he wrapped his arms around her and held her close. 

"Lucy," he sighed. 

"Um, hey," she patted his bicep. He squeezed her tighter then opened his eyes. 

"Oh!" he sat up quickly, sending Lillian tumbling to the floor. "Crap, sorry." He sat up and helped her off the floor. 

"Sleep well?" she asked. 

"Sort of. You're kind of bony." 

"Heh, so are you," she poked him in the ribs. "Bony, but warm." She swallowed. 

"You okay?"

"I think so. I need to stretch." She went back to her room and picked up her Pipboy. She sat on the bed and tried tuning it to one of the radio stations, but it was too staticky. "Dammit!" she yelled in frustration. 

"Can I help?" MacCready poked his head in the door. 

"I'm just trying to get a signal," she held up her Pipboy. I think I've heard a classical music station, but I can't quite get it."

MacCready smiled and took the Pipboy from her. He fiddled with the radio tuning dial until they heard classical music through loud static. He then smacked the Pipboy against the wall, causing Lillian to jump. Piano music suddenly played loud and clear. 

"Fixed." He handed the Pipboy back to her with a grin. 

"Ah, the ol' smack-and-fix," she took it from him and adjusted the volume, "I didn't want to try that because I didn't want to break it."

"I thought you were pretty handy with that kind of thing."

"To a point, yes. I'm not too familiar with Pipboys."

"But you fixed a power armour helmet." 

"I've seen schematics of them back when I had military training," she then lowered her voice, "Plus I may have peeked in Nate's manuals a few times when he brought them home."

"No schematics of Pipboys, huh?"

"Nope. Plus they're far smaller and everything's more condensed." 

"Anyway, I'll leave you to it," he looked around the room, "Where do you do your exercises?"

"In the kitchen." 

"Mind if I watch?"

Lillian raised her eyebrows. "Why?"

MacCready shrugged and blushed slightly. "I like watching you do them. It's... um.. nice."

"Nice?"

"Yeah."

"Okay." Lillian smiled at him. "I just need to change first."

"Right, okay."

MacCready returned to the living room and sat on the couch. Lillian came out a few moments later wearing her tank top and shorts and carrying her Pipboy. She placed it on the kitchen island and took her place beside it. She closed her eyes and started her warmups, happy to finally hear music she could get lost in. 

She forgot there was someone in the room with her, imagining she was back at the dance studio, participating in ballet class with her friends and fellow dancers. Watching Patricia Hartley do exaggerated impersonations of the ballet master behind his back. Hearing Joey Reynolds repeat everything in a whisper, as if he was making sure he was doing everything correctly. Madame Lafontaine sitting in her chair in the corner, tapping her cane in time with the piano. 

Tears stung at her eyes as she continued. She missed them terribly. She missed everyone. She tried to stay in touch with as many of them as she could. When the bombs dropped, she did spare a few thoughts for them, hoping they had been able to find shelter before the radioactive shockwave hit them. 

She finished up and opened her eyes. MacCready was still on the couch, but he was facing forward with his elbows on his knees and his head down. He didn't move until she sat next to him. 

"What's on your mind?" she asked. 

"Hm?"

"You're miles away. Something's been bothering you."

"It's fine."

"No, it's not." She put his hand on his shoulder. "It's okay. You can tell me."

MacCready tensed then stood up. He paced in front of her for a minute before speaking. 

"I need your help. Again." He ran his hand through his hair. "I didn't want to ask because you've already helped me once before."

"Of course. What do you need?"

"We should find your son first."

"Robert," Lillian said sternly.

MacCready stopped pacing and faced her. "I had a wife. Beautiful wife."

"Lucy."

"Yes. We have a son, Duncan." 

"Oh."

"But he's sick, I don't know what's wrong with him," his voice wavered, "He was playing in the field behind our farm and then started breaking out in blue boils."

"Blue boils? Goodness."

"I know what you're thinking. Why did I leave him?"

"You must have a very good reason."

"I need to find a cure. I met a guy who seemed to know of something. I didn't believe him until he mentioned his friend had broken out in blue boils. They told me about a place called Med-Tek where I could find it."

"So why didn't he get it?"

"His friend died, and then so did he. But not before he gave me the passwords to get into Med-Tek."

"What if it's a trap?"

"It can't be. I won't think that. I need to find this cure." 

"Med-Tek. Wait, that's in Malden, isn't it?" MacCready nodded. "Right. Let's go then."

"Wait, you mean you'll help me?"

"Of course. Why wouldn't I?"

"You have your son to find, don't you?"

Lillian sighed and stood up. "I don't know if I'll ever find him. But I don't think he'll go more missing if we take a day or two to get that cure."

"I... I don't know what to say. What you're doing... I don't think anyone has cared for me that much about me before. And even if it takes the rest of my life, I'll repay this debt to you. I swear it." 

Lillian started for her room, then turned back to him. "Your wife. What happened? You told the bartender in Diamond City 'she didn't make it'." 

"We were traveling. It started raining so we took shelter in a metro station. I should've known better. It was infested with ferals. They snuck up on us and were on her before I could fire a shot. Ripped her apart right in front of me."

"Oh god, I'm so sorry," Lillian raised her hand to her mouth, horrified. 

"Took everything I had to escape with Duncan in my arms," he paused, wiping his face, "Maybe it would have been better if we died there with her."

Lillian crossed the room to him and hugged him. "Don't you dare say that. I'm so sorry about what happened to Lucy, but it's not your fault."

"Metro stations are prime locations for ferals. I should've at least done something." He hugged her back tightly. 

"Come on, let's go get that cure for Duncan." She pulled away, squeezed his hand and returned to her room. 

  
Paladin Danse sat at his terminal, typing up his most recent report. Since Lillian and that man left, things had been quiet apart from Rhys's griping about the use of valuable chems to help her dog. They had finally received word back from the Citadel in the Capital Wasteland that they were readying the Prydwen for travel to the Commonwealth. Not too much longer now.

"Sir? There's a caravan outside," Haylen interrupted, "Said they need to speak to you."

Danse nodded and stood to get into his power armour. Can't take the chance of it being a trap. He headed out to see a caravan trader waiting with a guard.

"Paladin Danse, Brotherhood of Steel," he greeted them. 

"I have a package for you," the trader handed him a small box, "Picked it up at Drumlin Diner, just outside of Concord. It's from Lillian Parker."

"Oh! Thank you," he took the box eagerly.

"Yep. Good day." the trader tipped his hat and left with his guard. 

Danse brought the box inside, set it on the table and exited his power armour. He opened the box to find a pouch containing few syringes of med-x and stimpaks. On the bottom was an envelope with his name on it. He gave the box of chems to Haylen and took the envelope into the hallway to open it.

_Dear Paladin Danse_

_Thank you so much for your help with Canigou. Or rather, thanks to Haylen for her expert assistance. I don't know what I'd do without my dog. He's not entirely happy with being carried instead of running about, sniffing everything in sight, but he'll be free to run around in Sanctuary._

_I bought as many stimpaks and med-x as I could. I know it's not much, but I'll try to send more along when I can. I hope Knight Rhys isn't cursing me too much, though I'm sure he is in his mind._

_I hope things are going well. When we left, I didn't see any more ferals in town, so hopefully they won't be a problem._

_I'd say that MacCready sends greetings, but we both know that would be a lie. But I do want to clarify that there is nothing going on between MacCready and I. Nothing romantically. He's become a very good friend in the short time I've known him, and has helped me learn to survive. I know he came across as crass and rude, but that's just how he is. I'm not making an excuse for him, just telling you how it is._

_We're still on our way back to Sanctuary. I bought these chems from a diner outside of Concord. Afterward we will be heading back to Diamond City to hopefully meet this detective and we can finally continue the search my son. With any luck, the next time you see me, you can meet Shaun._

_I know it seems impossible to hold on to the hope I will find Shaun so soon, but I need to. I don't know if I could go on without that hope and so long as it still exists, so can I._

_Sorry, I didn't mean for this to go on for so long. Nate always said they needed a separate truck to deliver just my letters to him when he was stationed out west._

_I hope we'll see each other soon. Please give my regards to Haylen and Rhys (even if he refuses to acknowledge them)._

_Yours, Lillian_

Danse re-read the letter, especially the last lines. 

_I hope we'll see each other soon._

_Yours._

He smiled to himself and tucked the letter in his pocket. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It always bugged me that literally seconds after you tell Preston you were in cryo for 200 years, you watched your husband get shot and your baby kidnapped, he's like, "Oh. Damn. Anyway, there's a settlement that needs your help." And when you talk to Sturges, he acts like he's doing YOU a favour of getting you to help them out. "You're welcome here anytime!" Fuck you, dude, this is MY home. I opted not to evict them in this story. 
> 
> It also bugs me that when talking to MacCready, you don't find out about his wife's death until the last conversation when you have the option to romance him. How rude is that? "So my wife died horribly." "Cool, wanna bang?"


	12. Chapter 12

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lillian and MacCready try to leave Sanctuary, and when they finally do, they share a laugh and a bit more. Meanwhile, Danse writes a letter.

Lillian was nearly finished packing up when she suddenly heard screaming. She ran outside with MacCready, who had his rifle out. Marcy was shrieking with Jun desperately trying to calm her down. 

"What's happened?" Lillian asked. 

"THERE'S SOMETHING IN THE HOUSE DOWN THERE!" Marcy screamed and pointed down the road to the last intact house. Preston and Sturges were already headed towards it, followed by MacCready. 

"Marcy, it's probably just a fly or a dog," Jun said, but his voice was wavering. 

"It wasn't that! It was something else!" 

"It's nothing to be afraid of," Mama Murphy said calmly. 

"Yeah? Well let's see how afraid you are when it's MURDERING YOU!" 

"Okay, let's just calm down, okay?" Lillian said loudly, "They're checking it out. We'll be fine."

Marcy scoffed and pushed Jun away as she started pacing, not taking her eyes off the house where Preston, Sturges, and MacCready had entered. A moment later, MacCready emerged with his rifle over his shoulder. 

"Well?" Marcy demanded. 

"Seems you forgot all about someone else you invited here," he smirked at Lillian. 

"What? Who?" Lillian thought hard until she realised. "OH! Oh my god, is he okay?"

"Startled, but he wants to talk to you." 

"Goddammit, are you just inviting EVERYONE here?" Marcy yelled. 

Lillian ignored her and followed MacCready quickly to the house. Inside, Preston and Sturges were standing near the Vault-Tec rep, who was sitting at a table, shaking with fear. 

"Hey, you okay?" she asked him gently. 

"Sorry, I just... I didn't want to bother anyone," he said. 

"It's okay. I'm sorry, I completely forgot I had invited you here."

"A lot of people forget about me," the Vault-Tec rep said sadly. 

"I didn't mean to, I just... I have a lot on my mind." She paused. "Do you remember when you came to my house? To make sure we were registered for the vault?"

"Yeah, you made that joke about the apocalypse."

"I take that joke back," she smiled. "But you remember my husband? And my son?"

"Yes, and you said you were the only one who survived."

"Well, my son might have."

"I don't understand."

Lillian took a breath and explained what had happened. The Vault-Tec rep's eyes widened in horror. 

"But.. who would take a baby?"

"I don't know," she said quietly, "But I'm going to find out." 

"Sorry for scaring that lady."

"It's okay, she'll get over it," Sturges said. "Now, let's get you introduced to everyone."

"Oh, but would they be okay with a ghoul?"

"Of course we will!" Charlie suddenly appeared in the doorway with Canigou limping behind her. "And if they don't like it, then they can shove off."

"Charlie!" Lillian tried to keep herself from smiling, "But she is right. If they don't like it, they can find somewhere else to live. Though, I think with this group, it's best to just try to get along."

"Yeah, we've had a bit of a hard time the past couple of months," said Preston, "We'd rather not have to kick anyone out."

Charlie took the Vault-Tec rep's hand and led him out of the house. "So what's your name? I'm Charlie, and this is Canigou. He was Lillian's dog, but he had an accident and now I get to take care of him."

"So I think he'll be fine," said Sturges.

"Glad that's sorted," Lillian followed them out of the house, "I can't believe I forgot I had invited him here." 

"Sounds like you've had a lot on your mind," Sturges looked back at her, "So that really true? You were frozen in a vault for two hundred years?"

"Yeah. The vault's just up the hill," she pointed to the hilltop. "But there's nothing of any use there, I don't think." 

"But... everyone's still there?"

"Yeah."

"We'll make it off limits," said Preston. "No reason for anyone to be poking around in there."

"Thank you." Lillian hadn't taken her eyes off the hill. She could see the Vault-Tec security trailer still standing beside the platform. So many people were still outside when the platform was lowered. How many of them survived? How many had burned to death from the radiation and how many had managed to continue on as ghouls? There were many skeletons littering the area when she had emerged, but she ignored them. There were already too many down in the vault. 

"So, uh, you ready to get going?" MacCready interrupted her thoughts. 

"Yeah," she blinked back the tears that had started to form, "Yeah, let's go."

"Hey, before you go, I had word of a settlement that needed help," Preston said, "They're located at Tenpines Bluff, east of here. Any chance you could stop by and see what's going on?"

"I don't know," she looked over at MacCready who rolled his eyes, "I mean, I already have a full plate, and I don't know if we'll be in the area."

"Here, I'll show you where it is," Preston gestured to her Pipboy which she held out to him. "I can't do it myself because we're still settling in here," he said, inputting the location into her map. "But if you could, that would be great." He tried not to sound too desperate. 

"I'll see what I can do, but I can't promise," she said. 

"Great! The sooner we can start building up trust in the Minutemen, the sooner we can build up our ranks again!" Preston turned and started whistling happily. 

"Did I just get recruited?" Lillian asked MacCready once Preston was out of earshot. 

"I think you did," MacCready laughed as they returned to her house to retrieve their packs, "C'mon, let's get out of here before anyone else tries to get you to join their cult or something."

Paladin Danse sat in the lock up, tapping his pen on the desk. Lillian's letter lay unfolded next to some old, faded sheets of paper he found in the filing cabinets. He knew he didn't need to write her back, but he wanted to. But where to start? He had already scratched out _To Initiate Parker_ (too formal) and _Dear Lillian_ (too informal). _To whom it may concern_ was right out of the question. Why was this so _hard_? 

He took a deep breath and started writing. 

_Lillian -_

_I hope this letter finds you safe and well. How is your dog? Haylen did an excellent job and I have already made a note in my report that she is to be commended once again for her medical services. I have also put in a recommendation that scribes be trained to treat animals. The Brotherhood don't usually have dogs around, but perhaps we should change that._

_I have passed on your regards to Haylen, who hopes you and Canigou are doing well, and to Rhys, who did acknowledge them but did not say anything. He has been busy with patrols as have I. So far we haven't spotted any ferals and we haven't had any major problems. Only a couple of Raider attacks, but they were easily chased away._

_Please be careful while you're out there. I know you say you trust that MacCready, but people will do anything to take advantage of you out here. He might even be building your trust and lure you into a trap. I know you don't want to hear it, but I have seen it happen many times. - ~~I-~~ We can't lose you. _

_Good luck finding your son. I hope to see you soon. - ~~I-~~ We miss you. _

~~_-L-_ ~~  
_Paladin Danse_

There. That should do. Now he just had to wait for another caravan to come by. 

Lillian and MacCready had made it to the crossroads before Concord, with a quick stop at the Red Rocket station to see if there were any supplies they could use. MacCready happily claimed a carton of cigarettes, but there wasn't anything else of use. 

"So I know how to get to Malden by road, but if you know a better way off road," she opened her Pipboy's map. 

"Roads are good for now. We can head down here, past Concord, and go east along this road here," he ran his finger down the route. 

"Sounds good." She lowered her arm and they walked around Concord, now silent except for the sounds of scavenging flies and roaches. They reached the crossroads just before the Drumlin Diner when MacCready stopped. 

"Hold on, I just want to go ask that Trudy for a favour. Not that, you perv!" he added when Lillian raised her eyebrows at him. She laughed as he rushed to the diner. What kind of favour did he want to ask Trudy for? She supposed he'd tell her later. That is, if he wanted to. She waited outside until he was done, nodding a quick hi to Wolfgang and his companion, Simone.

"All good?" she asked MacCready when he came out. 

"Yep, let's go." 

She waved hello to Trudy and they continued on their way. She couldn't help but notice that MacCready kept trying to hide a smile and looking back at her. They had barely reached the old drive-in when she stopped. 

"Alright, what did you do?" she crossed her arms. 

"Me? Nothing!" 

"You've been grinning at me since we left Trudy's and I don't know if I should be worried or what."

"Okay, so I asked Trudy to send a message on to someone for you."

"What? Who? Why?"

"Just a message to that Danse guy about how much you want to jump his bones next time you see him."

Lillian smacked him in the shoulder. "Shut up. No, really, what was it?"

"Well, I sent a message on to Diamond City. But I don't know if it'll work, so I don't want to say in case it doesn't and you've already gotten your hopes up."

"Is it a time machine? Please god tell me it's a time machine," she grabbed him by his coat lapel. 

"No, sorry," he looked apologetic, "It's something else and you have to wait."

"So unfair," she pouted jokingly. 

"Yeah, yeah," he put his arm around her, "Everything is unfair. It's unfair that there is this gigantic movie screen and no movies to watch on it."

"Yeah," she sighed, looking up at the screen, "I wonder if we could make it work, see if the projector could be fixed up."

"But you'd need a car, wouldn't you? I mean, look at all these ones here."

"Well, we'd figure something out. Maybe play a silent movie instead." 

"Boring."

"Some of them are really good! My granddad showed me 'The Phantom of the Opera' and the unmasking scene made me pee my pants," Lillian laughed. 

"Ha, how old were you?"

"Seven. But I loved it. I've seen most of the remakes but my favourite is the silent version."

"Was it a ballet? Did you dance in it?"

"Nah, it was made into a musical but not a ballet."

"Oh." he looked around the drive-in lot. "We should see what we can do about this place." 

"Yeah." 

  
_"So which movies are we seeing tonight?" asked Lillian._

_"'The Curse of the Wasp Woman' and 'Space Rangers from Mars'," Nate replied as he parked the car, "Not that we'll be doing much watching." He winked at her._

_"You know, just once I'd like to actually watch both movies we pay to see," she unbuckled her seatbelt, slipped off her shoes and put her socked feet up on the dashboard._

_"Where's the fun in that?"_

_"I was looking through all the ticket stubs and I don't recognise most of them."_

_"I'm so good I can make you forget movies. Tell your friends."_

_"And have to fight off all those bitches? No, thank you." Lillian giggled._

_"You can always join in."_

_"Shut up," she punched him lightly in the shoulder. "Just for that, you can go get the snacks."_

_"I have to pay for them too, don't I?"_

_"Yep, you do," she grinned at him._

_"Pfft, making me pay for everything," Nate pretended to sulk as he got out of the car._

_Lillian smiled as she watched him go back to the concession stand. She felt so lucky and so happy. Despite everything going on in the world, Nate made everything better. When he proposed only a few weeks before, she didn't let him finish asking when she kissed him and said yes. Even though they had only been dating for a year, she knew she wanted to spend her life with him. She looked down at her engagement ring, a modest emerald instead of the traditional diamond. They were going to be married by the end of the year, possibly sooner if Nate was to be deployed._

_She sighed and fought back the tears that were forming as she tried not to think about being separated from Nate. She tried to convince him to find another job, something that would keep him nearby, but he vetoed the idea saying it would be unprofessional of him to leave the army before he was officially discharged. Not to mention the military was issuing stricter punishments to those who went AWOL and were denying all discharge requests._

_"Two large popcorns, extra butter, and two large Nuka Colas, extra caffeine," Nate opened the door after placing the popcorn and drinks on the roof of the car. "Hey, what's wrong?"_

_"Nothing," Lillian wiped her eyes. "Just being stupid."_

_"Tell me."_

_"I'm just worried you'll be sent out before we get married and before we get to enjoy being married," she burst into tears, "I don't want anything to happen to you."_

_"Oh, Lilli," he got in the car and pulled her to him, "No matter what happens, I will always come home to you."_

_"You can't promise that," she sobbed into his shoulder._

_"No, I can't, but I'll always be with you," he drew back and wiped her face with his thumbs, "Because I plan on haunting you until we're together again."_

_"Idiot," she laughed._

_"I'll always be your idiot," he kissed her. She kissed him back as they forgot all about the snacks still on the roof of the car and the movie that had just started playing._

Lillian followed MacCready across the drive-in lot. Was that what her dreams of Nate were? He was haunting her now? But if so, why was he being so mean to her? Saying she didn't love them because she hadn't found Shaun yet, or because she wasn't able to stop that man from killing Nate. She hoped Nate wouldn't be angry with her for helping MacCready. If he were here, they'd probably get along quite well. They were both easy-going and always making jokes. 

She tried to imagine Nate meeting Paladin Danse and she smirked to herself. Nate would've hated him. Well, maybe not hate, but strongly dislike. While Nate was always professional when he needed to be, he did goof off a lot and he much preferred to be around people who can take a joke. Like the time he was in charge of teaching Lillian and the others how to use power armour and he kept talking like a demented Protectron. She giggled as she tried to imagine Danse goofing off. 

"What's so funny?" MacCready turned back to her. 

"Just imagining Danse as a Protectron," she laughed. 

MacCready burst out laughing, "Why the hell are you imagining that?" 

"I don't know!" she couldn't stop laughing. MacCready was bent over, trying to catch his breath. Lillian wiped away the tears from her eyes as she calmed down, but when they looked at each other, they burst into laughter again and fell against each other. 

They didn't know how long they were laughing, but by the time they finally calmed down, they were lying on the side of the road. 

"My stomach hurts," MacCready said, holding his middle. 

"Mine too," Lillian sat up, "God, I haven't laughed like that in a long time."

"Heh, me too," he sat up as well, "Guess we both needed that."

"Yeah. My granddad always said laughter was the best medicine."

"I suppose laughter only goes so far for use as medicine."

"Ha, I told my granddad when I was a kid that laughter wouldn't fix my leg if I broke it and he told me, 'No, but it might help take away the pain.'" 

"I guess it would distract you enough."

"For a little while, yeah." She took a deep breath. "Okay, I think I'm good." 

"Yep, me too." They walked about five steps before MacCready spoke. "Protectron Danse."

They both fell over laughing again. 

  
Dusk was approaching and they needed to find somewhere to sleep soon. Lillian pointed out a building near the lake. 

"Wanna check that place out?" she asked, "It was a retirement home."

"If it's clear, we'll stay." They both took out their guns and swept the home until they were satisfied no one and nothing was around. 

"Jesus, these rooms are tiny," Lillian looked in one of the rooms. "These poor people."

"So what exactly are retirement homes? Just somewhere for people to retire to?"

"They're usually for people who need assistance with basic living, like cooking and housework, and also for hygienic reasons."

"Sounds terrible."

"I suppose most people these days don't quite live to that point," she said sadly. 

"Well, there are plenty of elderly people out there, but I guess they're still able to do things themselves."

"Yeah. Anyway, do you want to sleep in separate rooms or share one? The beds seem to be okay." Lillian sat down on the bed and bounced a little. Only a slight creak emerged from the bedframe. 

"Let's share, but let's find a bigger room." 

They wandered throughout the home until they found some sightly larger rooms. MacCready dropped his pack in one. "This looks good."

"Okay, I'm going to go set up some bottle alarms." Lillian left her pack in the room and went around retrieving all the empty bottles she had seen lying around. She set them up near the front door and throughout the main lobby. She set a few rows of bottles at either end of the hallway they were staying in. 

"All good?" MacCready was sitting on the bed, wiping down his rifle. 

"Yep." Lillian looked at her Pipboy. "If we set out early enough, we should be at Med-Tek by ten or eleven, noon at the latest."

"It still doesn't seem real," said MacCready, "I've been trying to get into that damn building for ages, but there were always too many ghouls. But now I feel like I have a chance." He looked earnestly at Lillian. She smiled back at him. 

"We're going to get that cure," she said, removing her Pipboy and setting it on the side table. "And you are going to make your son better." 

"All thanks to you." 

She sat next to MacCready and took his hand. He squeezed it, then leaned over and kissed her. She pulled back in surprise, then smiled and kissed him back. God, it felt so good to kiss someone again. He removed his hat, tossing it aside, and leaned her back on the mattress. She grasped the back of his head, keeping him close, and hooking her leg around his. 

After a few minutes, they sat up long enough to remove their coats, throwing them to the floor. MacCready removed her t-shirt, kissing her neck and shoulder before removing his own shirt. Lillian unbuckled his belt and undid his pants before he broke away to remove them along with his boots. She unzipped her pants, kicked off her own boots, and he pulled her pants off. He kissed her again as she unhooked her bra and tossed it on the floor. He ran his hands over her soft skin, gently cupping her breast. 

"Oh, Nate," she moaned softly. 

"Lucy," he sighed at the same time. 

They suddenly realized what they had said and quickly sprang apart. 

"Shit, I'm so sorry," Lillian said, suddenly feeling very exposed. She covered her chest with her arms. 

"No, I'm sorry," MacCready replied, "Dammit."

They silently sat apart on the bed for a few minutes, feeling embarrassed. MacCready handed over her t-shirt which she quickly put on. He slowly put his own pants and shirt back on, then handed Lillian her pants. 

"I guess I'm not ready to move on yet," she said quietly, putting her pants on. 

"Me neither," he sat next to her. "I'm real sorry for putting you in this position."

"Don't be sorry," she said, "It's not like I didn't do anything too." 

"I'll sleep in another room."

"Please don't." He looked at her questioningly. "I don't want to be alone."

"Okay." They smiled at each other then lay back down on the bed. She curled up against him as he put his arms around her. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The [Phantom of the Opera unmasking scene](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sa3bHKWZoJg) mentioned (not gonna lie, it startled the crap out of me when I first watched it when I was 20)
> 
> I sorta kinda forgot about inviting the Vault-Tec rep to Sanctuary many chapters ago. Whoops. 
> 
> And a very (belated) merry Christmas to you all! Thank you so, so much for reading my story. I have many scenes already written, I just need to connect them all. The scene with Lillian and MacCready kissing was written at least a year or two ago. So glad to have it out of the way now. 
> 
> Here's a [screenshot of Lillian and Danse](https://jeneralx9.tumblr.com/post/638703219775832064/belated-christmas-greetings-from-mr-and-mrs) with their faithful reindeer celebrating Christmas.


	13. Chapter 13

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lillian and MacCready talk about what happened the night before, then head to MedTek. Danse and Haylen have a short chat.

It was raining the next morning so Lillian and MacCready decided to wait until it stopped. She did her exercises in an empty room while he cooked up some breakfast (grilled radroach leftovers). Neither had spoken a word since the night before, only exchanging brief apologetic smiles before going about their morning routines. 

Lillian felt awful. Her stomach felt more queasy than usual. She worried that nothing would be the same between her and MacCready. Even though she had only known him for a short time, they had become good friends and she trusted him. Is that trust broken now? 

Not only that, she worried about what Nate would think. Sure, she imagined that Nate and MacCready would get along, but that camaraderie would probably shatter. Well, of course it would if Nate were still alive. Is it considered cheating when she's widowed? And she was thinking about Nate the whole time. MacCready seemed to be thinking of his own wife as well. 

When she finished her exercises and stretching, she still felt stiff. She headed to the main lobby where MacCready was sitting on a ratty couch. 

"Hey." She sat down next to him. 

"Hey." He didn't look at her, but handed a piece of cooked radroach in a folded napkin to her. 

She held it for a few moments before speaking. "Are we okay?"

"Are we cool?" he asked at the same time. They shared a small smile and he gestured for her to go ahead. 

"I'm sorry. I don't know if what happened last night was because I led you on, or if we just both miss our spouses. I didn't mean for it to happen." 

"Well, if I'm going to be honest, I can't deny that I do like you," he kept his gaze on his hands. "I just... I couldn't help but kiss you. I guess I'm just so grateful for everything you've done for me. And when you kissed me back, I couldn't help but think of Lucy. I wanted you to be Lucy. I guess that sounds kind of crazy, huh?"

"No, I get it. I wanted you to be Nate." Lillian burst out sobbing, "I just miss him so much." MacCready pulled her to him as she cried loudly into his shoulder. He hugged her tightly and rubbed her back. When she had calmed down, he kissed her forehead. 

"Hey, it's okay," he said softly, "I know you miss him. You'll always miss him. Just like I'll always miss Lucy."

"I guess we're kind of the same, huh?" 

"Yeah, I guess we are." he sighed, "I don't want this to change things."

"I don't want it to change either," Lillian wiped her face on her shirt. "But I don't know if I want to go any further."

"Like, as more than friends?" she nodded. "I don't know either. I mean, I like you. If you asked me to be more, I'd probably say yes. But I don't know if I'm ready for that."

"I like you too, but I don't think I like you as more," she sniffled. "It wouldn't be fair to either of us if we tried to pursue this further."

"I get it. It's okay." he paused. "Do you regret it?"

"Last night? No. But I think I might have if we had gone all the way."

"Oh."

"You're a sweet man, funny, and handsome as hell." MacCready scoffed with laughter. "You are! But I don't think we're right for each other. Not long term, anyway." 

"Yeah, I guess not," he sighed then reached forward to gently brush a strand of hair away from her face and behind her ear. "You're not so bad looking yourself." 

She laughed. "So, we're good?"

"Of course we are. Just glad we got this sorted out."

"Me too." She stood and went over to the window. "I guess the rain isn't going to let up any time soon."

"Don't know about you, but I could use some more rest," MacCready joined her by the window, "I didn't get much sleep last night."

"Neither did I. I was too busy worrying myself sick." she rubbed her stomach which still felt a bit uneasy. "I could do with a good lie down."

"You go rest, I'll stay out here and keep watch."

"You sure?" 

"Yeah," he took her hand and squeezed it, "Go sleep. I'll wake you when the rain stops."

She leaned up and kissed him on the cheek. "Thank you."

_"So. Didn't take you long to find someone new."_

_Lillian opened her eyes to see Nate sitting on the edge of the bed._

_"It's not like that."_

_"Oh no, just getting mostly naked with another man."_

_"Please don't do this."_

_Nate sighed then moved to lie down next to her. "I guess I can't blame you."_

_"I don't know what to do." She tried reaching for him, but her hand went through his arm. "Why did this have to happen?"_

_"You remember when your mother always said things happen for a reason?"_

_"Yeah?"_

_"She can shove that saying up her--"_

_"Nate!" she giggled._

_"I can't believe I'm saying this, but I miss your mother."_

_"Me too."_

_"She made the best turkey at Thanksgiving. Because it wasn't burnt."_

_"The one time I mess up cooking a turkey..."_

_"It was on fire!"_

_"Barely!"_

_"The look on your parents' faces when they showed up expecting a Thanksgiving feast and instead are greeted by the fire department and a pizza delivery guy."_

_Lillian laughed. "What about that time you burned soup?"_

_"Hey, I was being distracted by a beautiful woman in my bed." He winked at her. She tried to elbow him in jest, but her arm went through him again._

_"I miss you so much."_

_"I miss you too, hon." He turned on his side toward her. "I won't get mad if you bunker up with someone else. Just so long as you're happy. And he's not better looking than me," he added with a wink._

_"But I'm happy with you."_

_"I'm not even here."_

  
Lillian woke up sweating. She was alone. Her stomach lurched and she rushed out of the room. MacCready rose up from the couch he was sitting on, but she pushed him out of the way as she ran past. She barely made it outside the door when she vomited. 

"Jesus, you okay?" MacCready joined her outside. 

"Sorry, just... felt a bit sick," Lillian wiped her mouth and took a deep breath. 

"Yeah, I figured," he rubbed her back, "At least the rain stopped."

Lillian looked up to see strips of blue sky through the slowly dispersing clouds. "What time is it?" she asked as she looked down at her Pipboy. "You let me sleep until two in the afternoon?" 

"Seemed like you needed the sleep," he shrugged. 

"Dammit, you should've woken me up, we could've been there by now." She hurried back inside to retrieve her pack. She came back out to see MacCready sitting on the couch with his head in his hands. "What's wrong?"

"What if it's not there?" he asked quietly, "What if there is no cure?"

"Well, let's find out."

"And if there isn't anything?"

"If there isn't, then... " she tapered off. "Then you need to go back to your little boy."

MacCready nodded slowly. "I can't fail him." 

"You won't. But if we don't go, then we won't know for sure." Lillian was stern, but inwardly she was worried. What if there really isn't a cure for Duncan? What if it's a cure for something else? Or something more ... sinister? She had heard rumours about Med-Tek, but that's all they were. Rumours. She didn't pay much attention since it didn't directly affect her, but thinking about it now, maybe she should have. 

"You're right. Let's go." MacCready stood, looking more determined. 

  
Paladin Danse stayed on patrol all day, waiting for a caravan to pass so he could send off his letter to Lillian. Or better yet, that Lillian would stop by on her way back to Diamond City. He knew deep down that the letter was unnecessary, but he still wanted to send it to her. 

"There you are, Paladin." Haylen's voice broke the silence behind him. 

"Scribe," he greeted her, "Is there a problem?"

"No, just... can I ask you something? Off the record."

Danse frowned. "Sure."

"Are you taking all these extra patrols in case Lillian comes by?"

"Now why would you think that?" 

Haylen said nothing, but removed some folded sheets of paper from her pocket which Danse recognized as his first attempts at writing the letter. 

"I can explain."

"You don't need to," she said with a smile, "I'm just concerned you aren't getting enough rest because you're worried about her."

"I'm fine."

"Uh huh," Haylen crossed her arms. "You know, there might be a way to send her messages without having to send a letter."

"I'm listening."

"I've been doing some research and I might be able to sort out a messaging system to her Pipboy."

"Like the terminal messaging system at the Citadel and on the Prydwen?"

"Yes, but those are short-range. This would need to be more long-range since we don't know where exactly she will be. But we could use the transmitter from Arc-Jet. It's just a matter of making sure the messages are only received by Lillian and vice versa."

"And how do you propose to do that?"

"Well, Pipboys have their own identification code within them, much like our own terminals. If we get the code from her Pipboy, I should be able to work something out."

"Right. So now all we need is Lillian to come back."

"Yes, and you trying to do 24-hour patrols on your own isn't going to make her come back faster." Haylen moved closer to Danse. "You do seem happier when she's around." She winked at him.

Danse watched Haylen return to the police station. A moment later, he spotted a brahmin laden with cargo being led by an older woman. He rushed down to the road to meet her. 

"Excuse me, can you deliver a letter for me?" he asked. 

"Not even a hello, how are you?" the woman sighed. "Where's it going?"

"Sanctuary Hills. To Lillian Parker." 

"Yeah, I know the place. 10 caps."

Danse handed over the caps and the letter. 

"Is there another person you want this delivered to in case the recipient is unavailable?"

"Um, I don't know. Oh! Look for a three-legged dog. His name is Canigou."

The woman stared at him. "You... want the letter delivered to a dog?" 

"No, there will be a young girl caring for the dog. Give the letter to her. She'll make sure Lillian gets it."

"If you insist."

"Here. An extra 10 caps to make sure it makes it to Sanctuary." 

"Yeah, sure." The woman pocketed the caps and the letter. "All sorts out here," she muttered as she continued up the road. 

  
"Goddamn, is that all of them?" MacCready asked, exhausted. He and Lillian had reached the lowest levels of the Med-Tek research building. It was swarming with feral ghouls, which they learned through terminal entries were former employees and test subjects. But none of the terminals so far had mentioned anything about a cure for diseases with blue boils. 

"Hey, I think I have something here," Lillian called from another room. MacCready rushed to join her. She was leaning over a terminal and reading. "Listen to this. 

'Subject: 4529-B2  
Symptoms: Headache, second degree burns on arms, boils on back, no fever  
Treatment: 0.5mL Prevent 45M  
Observations: Subject displayed signs of hair loss, cysts, and red spots on chest. Erections lasting more than four hours is no longer a problem.  
Notes: After two days, all symptoms have dissipated, as have the cysts and red spots. Will need more time to see if the hair loss is temporary or permanent. Recommend a higher dose of Bacteria J34 in the next subject.'"

Lillian stopped reading and looked over at him. 

"So, is that it? This 'Prevent'?" he asked. 

"I guess so, they mention the boils but not if they're blue or otherwise," she shrugged, "But it's the best we got. Some of the other research entries seem to be treating people with different symptoms, but all with Prevent. The results were varied." She stood straight and looked him in the eyes. "Are you sure you want to do this? Knowing that all these people suffered for the development of this cure? And knowing all the possible side effects?"

"Yes! I have to do it," MacCready frowned at her. 

"Okay, I'm just making sure you understand," she gave him a small smile, "It's in Laboratory 2C."

MacCready turned and rushed out, following the faded signs on the walls towards Lab 2C. Lillian followed until they reached the door. He put his finger to his lips and nodded toward the door. She crept over to a window and tried to look through the tiny openings in the blinds. 

"I think there are three in there," she whispered, "Including one that's glowing."

"Damn, those are tough bastards," he whispered back, "I'll take that one if you take out the other two."

Lillian nodded and used the terminal to open the door. The ghouls inside didn't notice right away until MacCready fired a couple of shots at the glowing ghoul. Lillian focused her aim on the normal looking ghouls while MacCready shot off one of the glowing ghoul's legs. He finished it off then helped Lillian take out the other two. 

"So that glowing one, is it just super radiated?" she pointed towards the green glowing ghoul's body. 

"Pretty much. Even worse, if you don't take those ones out right away, they can do this thing where they resurrect nearby dead ghouls."

"What the fuck," Lillian's eyes widened. "Just when I think this world can't get worse, I learn more bullshit like this."

"Oh, wait until you hear about mirelurk queens and kings," MacCready grinned. 

"Fuck off, I don't want to know," she flipped him off jokingly and started looking through the dirty lab. After a few minutes, she spotted a red syringe with the faded letters of 'Prevent' written on it. "Found it!" she held it up. 

"Holy crap, we did it!" he ran to her and took the syringe carefully, "We actually did it!" He kissed her and hugged her tightly. 

"Yep, we did it," she hugged him back. 

"Sorry, didn't mean to kiss you, but..."

Lillian waved him off. "It's fine. But can we get out of here, please?"

"Absolutely. Let's go." Lillian could've sworn MacCready nearly skipped back to the elevator. She shuddered as she stepped in, still not trusting these damn things. 

"So I guess this means you're leaving," she said as they exited the building. 

"Well, no," he said thoughtfully, "If I get this to Daisy in Goodneighbor, she'll make sure it gets to Duncan."

"But don't you want to go yourself?"

"You hired me, remember? Even though I paid back your caps, and we're friends, I don't just abandon jobs."

"Don't be stupid, you are going to bring that to Duncan yourself."

"But--" 

"Don't even think about arguing with me. I was a lawyer, you know."

"Pfft, you weren't that kind of lawyer."

"Still, I insist. I DEMAND you return to your son. If you don't, I will never speak to you again."

"Well at least things will be quiet," he grinned at her. 

"Fuck off," she elbowed him in jest. 

MacCready was about to say something else, but a beeping from Lillian's Pipboy interrupted him. She looked down. Unknown Signal.

"What's that?" he asked. 

"I don't... wait. Maybe it's a distress signal from that missing Brotherhood patrol," she turned, taking a few steps in different directions until she settled on one way. "It's coming from this way."

"Be careful, you don't know what's waiting for you," he gripped his rifle. She nodded in response and removed her laser pistol. They followed the increasing beep to a ruined house. There was a crater in the middle with bits of power armour embedded inside. Another suit of power armour was leaning against the desk and Lillian realised there was a decomposed body inside. 

"Well, looks like this one didn't make it," MacCready approached the body. 

"Guess not," she looked at the crater. "Doesn't look like there are more bodies. Just the suits of power armour. But why would they leave it all here?"

"Here, maybe this will have something," he tossed a holotape to her. She put it in her Pipboy and let it play. It was frantic and a different people were shouting. 

_"... ambushed on the road, we're outnumber five to one! Varham, report!"_

_"Core's down to 5%!"_

_"We'll have to scuttle the armour. We can't let them have it."_

_"Varham!"_

_"Dammit! Astlin, set the self-destructs! Faris, fall back! We'll head for the old military base, then try to make it to our holdout. The code will be our callsign. Move, move!"_

The holotape clicked off. Lillian and MacCready looked at each other. 

"Damn, that sucks," he said. 

Lillian's brow was wrinkled in thought. "I think that military base they're talking about is the training yard. It's not too far from here. At least, I don't think it is." 

"You're not going there now, are you?" he asked. 

"It might be on the way back to Goodneighbor, depending on which route we take," she said, consulting her Pipboy's map. "Hmm, only if we detour slightly to the east here." She pointed it to him. "But right now, our priority is getting you and the cure back to Goodneighbor."

"Well, if it's on the way, we could look in, just to see." 

"Thanks, maybe there will be a clue to where their holdout is supposed to be."

"For now, we should find somewhere to hole up for the night. This is too open," MacCready gestured around the ruined building. 

"Should we head back to MedTek? We know it's clear now, and sturdy."

"Well I don't have any other ideas. Let's go." 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy New Year!! 
> 
> I hope you're enjoying Lillian's story as much as I enjoy writing it. :)


	14. Chapter 14

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lillian and MacCready investigate the National Guard Training Yard, then return to Goodneighbor and Diamond City. Paladin Danse finds out a bit more about Lillian's past.

The turret exploded after MacCready shot it. The noise attracted some ghouls that had been hiding in a nearby ruined bus. The ghouls rushed out and leapt at Lillian and MacCready, but a hidden mine exploded, killing them. 

"The welcoming committee has changed since I was last here," Lillian said as they passed the large 'National Guard Training Yard' sign. 

"So this is where you learned to shoot a gun?"

"Yeah. We had weapons training here. This is where I met Nate."

  
_"Rousseau, pay attention," Corporal Dickinson snapped, "I know you don't want to be here, but if you want that college degree, you must do this."_

_"Fine," she groaned inwardly._

_"What was that?"_

_"Yes, sir," she exaggerated a salute. She knew she was being childish, but she couldn't help it._

_"If you do not start cooperating, you will be removed from not only the base, but also your college. Is that what you want?"_

_"No, sir."_

_"Good, I'm glad we understand each other. Now step up and take the pistol."_

_Lillian put her ear protectors on and stepped into the firing lane. She picked up the pistol and turned it over in her hands. She turned to the Sergeant. "Hey, is this thing loaded?"_

_Her question was answered as she inadvertently pulled the trigger and a shot rang out._

_"WHAT THE FUCK!" a soldier passing by fell to the ground. Lillian ran over quickly to him, ignoring Corporal Dickinson's yelling._

_"Oh my god, I'm so sorry!" She knelt by the soldier who had his hand on his rear._

_"The hell is wrong with you?" he yelled at her._

_"I said I'm sorry! I wasn't aiming for you," she yelled back._

_The soldier stood, wincing as he turned to try to look at his bleeding backside. "Good thing you dummies use rubber bullets." He paused when he finally looked at her._

_"Are you okay?" she asked, trying to get a look at the damage she had caused._

_"Sergeant Parker, I apologise for the lack of discipline on our trainee's part," Corporal Dickinson joined them, glaring at Lillian._

_"Thank you, Corporal, she can make up for it by escorting me to medical."_

_Corporal Dickinson narrowed his eyes at Sergeant Parker. "Is that... wise?"_

_"With all due respect, SIR, but I'd better stay here and complete training," Lillian said. She was in no mood for this silly nonsense._

_"I'm bleeding and I might die, what if my last wish was to have a pretty girl by my side?" Sergeant Parker grinned at her with a wink._

_Lillian slapped him hard across the face. "You're not going to die, you dick." She turned and stalked back to the firing range, but not before she heard Sergeant Parker speak again._

_"Damn, she one of the college recruits?"_

_"Yep."_

_"What's she studying?"_

_"Law, I think."_

_"Aw, shit."_

_"Better apologise to her, Nate. After you go see the medic."_

"Wait, you shot your husband?" MacCready said incredulously. 

"He wasn't my husband then."

"You shot him in the butt!"

"By accident!" 

"Then slapped him in the face!"

"He was coming on to me. It was uncalled for!"

"And somehow you managed to marry him."

"Well, turned out he wasn't that much of a dick. Quite nice, actually. Asshole." Lillian smiled to herself.

"Yeah, I can't imagine you being with anyone who is a jerk," MacCready said with a slight sigh. 

"Oh, I've had my fair share of those," Lillian reached for the doorknob to enter the building, but stopped. "I guess we shouldn't just waltz in, huh?"

"I mean, you could, but only if you want to be a feral ghoul's lunch."

They crouched down and Lillian slowly opened the door as MacCready aimed inside. It was dark and quiet. They crept inside, taking care over the rotten wood debris. The floor creaked beneath their feet as they made their way through the front foyer. He stopped and pointed up at the second floor, visible through the broken ceiling. A ghoul was lying on the floor, but Lillian was unsure if it was alive or dead. 

MacCready picked up a small piece of broken wood and threw it near the ghoul. The sound woke up the ghoul who stood and looked for the source of the sound. A moment later, there was a crack and it fell dead after MacCready shot it. 

The sound roused other ghouls in the building and the patter of footsteps filled the silence. Lillian and MacCready waited until they had a better idea of where the ghouls were before shooting them. 

"Ugh, it's so gross," Lillian felt her stomach lurch. 

"Yeah, you'll get used to it."

"I'm trying, but my stomach doesn't agree." She rubbed her belly to try to calm it down. 

"Hey, in here," MacCready called from an office at the back of the building. Lillian joined him to see a few ghoul corpses and the decomposed body of someone in a Brotherhood of Steel uniform. "Looks like the ferals cornered her in here. Didn't stand a chance."

She knelt down by the body to turn off the distress pulser and noticed a holotape beside it. She wiped it off on her pants then played it in her Pipboy. 

_"Knight Tara Astlin. Brotherhood of Steel Recon Team 429-Alpha. Serial number 3431. It's been three hours since I set my distress pulser. There's been no word from the Paladin or Faris. Their objective was a satellite array on the coast. They may be out of range. My orders were to hold this position at all costs. The entire site has been overrun. The door won't last much longer. Paladin Brandis, sir. It's been an honor, sir."_

"Damn, that's--" Lillian stopped when she noticed MacCready wasn't with her. She found him waiting in the foyer. "Hey, what's-- oh. That reminded you of your wife, didn't it?"

He nodded slowly. "Sorry, it's not like me."

"It's fine, if you need to take a moment."

"Nah, I'm good," he cleared his throat, "So any clues to where the others are?"

"Satellite array. Down the road a bit, you can see it there, but I'll worry about that later. Right now, we need to get you back to Goodneighbor." 

Paladin Danse couldn't sit still. They had received word from the Citadel that the Prydwen would be leaving within the next couple of days. He was anxious for them to arrive. He had sent in his report about Lillian, which had been received well. Elder Maxson himself said he looked forward to meeting Danse's new recruit. 

Danse just hoped that Lillian wouldn't talk back. He had spoken highly of her in his report, but he conveniently left out the parts where she was borderline insubordinate. He also left out the part that she only joined the Brotherhood to have a better chance to find her missing son. Even though she never explicitly said as much, it was clear that that was her priority. He hoped that when she found her son, she would stay with the Brotherhood. He-- they would keep her and her son safe. 

But something bothered him. He overheard Knight Rhys telling Haylen that Lillian could be lying to them. It was near impossible for someone to be alive from before the war, unless they had turned ghoul, which she certainly wasn't. Sure she had mentioned the cryogenic pods, but what were the chances they would have been in working condition all this time? Lillian had mentioned there had been a mutiny within the vault within the first few years. 

He had to be sure. But he couldn't go to the vault himself to check the records, nor could he send Haylen or Rhys. That would be irresponsible. He didn't want to doubt her. How could he even ask her for the truth?

He paused by the lockup for probably the sixth time that day, hoping that Lillian would be there. But of course, she wasn't. 

"Seems Initiate Parker was quite familiar with jail cells," Haylen joined him. 

"Hm?"

"Have a look," she led Danse to her terminal. "I've been perusing the records I was able to get from the Boston Bugle building, and looks like she's been arrested before."

"Are you sure?" Danse frowned. Surely Haylen was mistaken. "What makes you sure it's Lil- erm, Parker?"

"Well. Pissed off ballet dancer turned law student, angry at the military and the government for taking over the theatre." She opened a file on the terminal. It was the front page of the Boston Bugle with the headline, "BOSTON BALLERINA ARRESTED FOR DISTURBING THE PEACE" accompanied by a picture. And there was Lillian, looking angry and shouting as two police officers were holding her hands behind her back. 

"'Former dancer with the Boston Ballet, Lillian Rousseau, was arrested following an anti-war rally outside Fenway Park'," Danse read the picture's caption aloud. 

"Yep." Haylen smirked. "I think I like her more now. Wouldn't think she was that strong, but apparently it took four officers to drag her to the paddy wagon _after_ they handcuffed her."

"Well, let's hope she doesn't do anything rash when the Prydwen arrives," Danse said, trying not to sound impressed. 

"Probably not, but if she does--"

"It'll be that merc's fault," he interrupted bitterly, "She's probably learned some bad habits from him."

"I don't know, he wasn't even around when she first got arrested. And neither were we. Heck, the Brotherhood wasn't even thought of."

"I suppose you're right." It was strange to think that Lillian knew a life where there was no Brotherhood of Steel, no radiated wasteland, no wayward mercenaries to lead her astray. He hoped she'd return soon, just so he knew she was okay. But now he felt better, knowing she hadn't been lying about being from before the war. 

"Oh my god, you actually got it!" Daisy's eyes gleamed with happiness when MacCready told her about how they got the cure for Duncan. 

"We sure did," he smiled over at Lillian, "Now I need to get it to Duncan."

"Of course, the next caravan heading that way is due in a couple of days. The driver's a good one, he'll make sure the cure gets to your son."

"Wait, you're not going to go?" Lillian frowned at MacCready.

"Well--"

"No, no, no. You are going to bring that cure to your son yourself," she demanded.

"But--"

"Not another word. Your son needs that cure, but he also needs his daddy." 

"What about you?"

"I'll be fine," Lillian tried to sound sure.

"Well, if you think that's best." 

"I have to agree with her," said Daisy, "Duncan needs you."

"Yeah, you're right. Both of you." He paused. "Does the caravan go by Diamond City?"

"Sure does," said Daisy, "Stops there after Goodneighbor."

"Good, can you tell the driver to meet us there?"

"What, Goodneighbor not good enough for you?" Daisy joked. 

"No! It's not that, it's just that I arranged for... something in Diamond City. Kind of a surprise." He nodded slightly to Lillian. 

"Ahh, I see," Daisy winked at him, then turned to Lillian. "Hope you take care of MacCready, he's one of the good ones."

"Debatable, considering this 'surprise' isn't a time machine," Lillian laughed. 

"Still trying to get used to all this, huh?" Daisy asked. 

"Yeah," Lillian sighed. 

"Well, if you need to chat about the old days, I'd be up for it." 

"Don't suppose you ever went to the ballet, did you?"

"The ballet? Me? Nah, not my scene. I remember there was a free performance at the Amphitheatre, but I was too busy getting into trouble to go."

"Oh. Shame."

"Yeah, Dais, you could've seen her dance," said MacCready. 

"No kidding! Well, I'm sorry I missed it." 

"I won't hold it against you," Lillian said with a sad smile. She realised she may never have a chance to perform again. She knew that it was unlikely, but now it seemed more real. She wondered if the old Opera House was even still standing. 

"Well, let's get going," MacCready pulled at Lillian's sleeve. They said goodbye to Daisy and started for Diamond City. 

Apart from some distant gunfire, the walk was quiet. When they finally reached the gate, Lillian turned to MacCready. 

"So, why did you insinuate to Daisy that we were together?"

"I did?"

"Yeah. When you told her to have the caravan meet you here because you had a surprise lined up, then nodded towards me."

"Oh. I didn't realise I did that. Sorry," MacCready blushed, "I was just wanting to get here to thank you for everything."

"So what is this surprise then?"

"Let's see if it's ready," MacCready grinned and led the way through the gate. They had no sooner reached the bottom of the stairs to the field when a figure clad in red rushed up to them. 

"So there you are!" 

"Oh! Uh, Piper, right?" Lillian asked. 

"Right you are! Been wondering where you've been, Blue," Piper grinned, "You still owe me an interview."

"Wait, 'Blue'?" Lillian looked confused. 

"Well, yeah. Clearly from a vault," Piper gestured at her, "You may not be wearing the jumpsuit, but that fish out of water look? Dead giveaway. Besides, I bet a lot of people call you Red anyway." She pointed at Lillian's hair. 

"Heh, yeah," Lillian's hand went up to her head. 

"We got somewhere else to be right now, but meet us at the Dugout after," MacCready interrupted. 

"See you there!" Piper hurried into her house. 

"Alright, let's go see Arturo. Hopefully he got my message." MacCready said nervously. 

Arturo greeted them warmly when they approached. "Good to see you again! Those guns been keeping you alive then, huh?"

"He's done a lot too," Lillian smiled over at MacCready. 

"Yes, and I did get your message. Just a minute." Arturo went into his home and returned a moment later with a homemade bow and a bundle of arrows. "Luckily there was a section on these in a couple of weapons books I have. So, here, try it out." He handed them to Lillian. 

"Wait, you had him make this? For me?" Lillian took the bow and looked it over. MacCready nodded. 

"Well you said you preferred this, didn't you? And I figure it would be a lot quieter." 

"I... I don't know what to say," she held it up and pulled on the string, "Tension could be tighter."

"I'll adjust it, then you can take it out back to try it out," Arturo took the bow from Lillian and started making adjustments, "Abbott set up a target by the wall so you can see how it works. I tried it myself, just can't get used to it." he chuckled. "There, better?" He handed the bow back to Lillian who gave it a few pulls the nodded. "Good. I only have these arrows made, but I wrote down instructions so you can make more yourself. Won't be too difficult, you can get just about everything to make them here."

"Thanks," Lillian said, still not believing what was just happening. "Oh, did that letter I dropped off for you make it to its destination?"

"Hm? Oh! Yes. Thank you for doing that. It was very important." Arturo turned away, indicating he didn't want to say any more about it. 

"So let's go try this out," MacCready said, "I want to see it in action."

They headed to the back of the field where an older man in overalls was painting the wall green. He waved slightly with his paint brush towards a small firing range. Plywood cutouts of mobsters were riddled with bullet holes, along with circular targets. Lillian picked a spot in front of one of the targets and took an arrow out from the homemade quiver. She aimed, then turned to MacCready. 

"I haven't done this in a while, in case you're expecting to be impressed or something."

"Over two hundred years, isn't it?"

"Ha ha." She turned back to the target, pulled the string back and fired the arrow toward the circular target. It embedded itself into the ground five feet in front of the target. "Dammit."

"Hey, relax," MacCready said, "It's kind of like firing a gun, right?"

"Exactly like firing a gun, except not," Lillian said with a smile as she took out another arrow. She aimed again and this time hit the target on the outer circle. She continued shooting until she ran out of arrows, each one hitting the target closer to the bullseye. 

"Nice," MacCready said as he accompanied her to retrieve the arrows from the target, "Guess we'll have to get more arrows made."

"Yeah, I'll do it later." 

"Why not now?"

"I told Piper I'd meet her at the Dugout, remember?"

"Oh yeah. Let's go then."

  
"Blue! Over here!" Piper waved at Lillian and MacCready when they walked into the Dugout Inn. 

"I have a name, you know," Lillian said as she sat down. 

"And I'm sure it's a lovely name," Piper wiped some crumbs off the notepad on the table. "So it's Lillian, isn't it?"

"Yeah, how did you know?" 

"I have my ways of finding out things. It's my job," Piper said slyly. "So I want an interview. And once my photo guy gets here, some pictures too."

"I guess so."

"Cool, so I know you're from a vault, what was it like?"

"Cold. They put us in these cryogenic pods. I only recently thawed out."

"Wait, are you saying you were alive from before the war?" Piper's eyes widened. 

"Behold, I am over 200 years old."

"Oh my god." Piper looked like Christmas had come early. "'The Woman Out of Time'. Perfect! So how does the Commonwealth compare to what you knew before?"

"Seriously? It's terrible out here. All the death and destruction, giant goddamn bugs," Lillian sighed, "But I also see people rebuilding, and just keep on going. It gives me hope."

"I know you're looking for your baby boy. Any idea of where he might be?"

"I don't know, that's why I need to talk to the detective."

"Yeah, Nicky Valentine. Come to think of it, I haven't seen him in a while. Do you think the Institute was involved?"

"With the detective?"

"No, with taking your baby."

"I don't know. Maybe. Maybe not."

"That's the scary thing. Someone goes missing, and you just don't know what happened. Maybe they left on their own accord, or maybe they were taken during the night. Obviously your baby didn't leave on his own."

"I saw him being taken in the vault. My husband was--- he tried to stop--" Lillian stopped. 

"Oh, Blue, I'm so sorry," Piper stopped writing and reached across the table to take Lillian's hand. "Well, if anyone can solve this mystery, it'll be ol' Nick." She held Lillian's hand for a moment longer, then quickly let go, clearing her throat. "Ahem, anyway. Just one more question. Do you have anything to say to others in the Commonwealth that have lost someone and are too afraid to look for them?"

"Um, I guess, don't lose hope," Lillian sniffled a little, "If you don't try, then you may not get closure."

"That works," Piper scribbled in her notepad then closed it. "So, I'll tell you what, I'll come with you to see Nick and maybe watch your back out there."

"Just what she needs, a whole crowd of people following her around," MacCready rolled his eyes. 

"Actually, it is what I need since you'll be leaving soon," Lillian poked him in the shoulder. 

"Oh? What's more important than helping her find her baby?" Piper narrowed her eyes at MacCready. 

"It's personal." MacCready glared at her. Piper looked over at Lillian. 

"It is personal, and he has a very good reason," Lillian said. 

"Well, if you say so. Ah! Jimmy! About time!" Piper waved at a middle-aged black man who had just entered carrying a large camera bag. 

"I was busy, Piper," Jimmy sat down next to her. 

"Uh huh, so this is Lillian," she gestured grandly.

"Charmed," Jimmy said, not looking at Lillian and digging into his bag.

"Um, I don't think I want my picture taken right now, to be honest," Lillian said. 

"Well, christ, why the hell am I here then?" Jimmy exasperated. 

"Oh, don't be such a _woman_ ," Piper scoffed, "You could do with meeting new people anyway, always locked up in your house with the lights off like some creepy hermit."

"I'm busy developing," Jimmy said. 

"What sort of pictures do you take?" Lillian asked. 

"Whatever Piper wants for her paper, but I also try to get landscapes. Nature. That sort of thing." He took out a large envelope and handed it to Lillian. Inside were a number of photos, some black and white, others in colour, of a variety of subjects. There were portraits of Diamond City residents going about their business, pictures of dilapidated buildings throughout Boston, and some of the irradiated wildlife. 

"Hold on, there are deer with two heads out here?" Lillian held up one of the pictures. 

Jimmy frowned. "Where the hell did you find this one, Piper?"

"She was _frozen_ in a vault for two hundred years!" Piper said dramatically. 

"Bullshit." Jimmy said after a brief pause. 

"It's true," Lillian sighed. 

"But... how?"

"Dude, I just _told_ you!" Piper poked him. 

"Huh. So what was it like before everything went to shit?"

"Cleaner. I could walk down the street without worrying about getting my head blown off. Flies were the size of your thumbnail." 

"Must've been nice."

"It was." 

"Ahem, so anyway," Piper interrupted, "Where ya stayin'?"

"Um, I guess we'd just get a room here," Lillian looked over at MacCready who shrugged. 

"Oh no. No, no, no. You can stay with me," Piper insisted. 

"Him too?" Lillian pointed at MacCready. 

"Yeah, why not? It's just me and my sister. And a broken printing press. And a working printing press. And about fifty rolls of paper. Twenty cans of ink. But lots of room!"

"Sounds good," Lillian smiled. 

"If you're sticking around, you should see about buying that place in the middle of the market," said Jimmy, "Been empty for a little while."

"I don't know, I've been saving for the detective." 

Jimmy looked at Piper expectantly. "I'll explain later," she said before turning back to Lillian, "We'll look into it tomorrow after we go see Nick. Come on, Blue. Big day tomorrow!"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Apologies for taking so long. I've been working on some other stories which I may start posting as well. I flit between stories depending on my mood. 
> 
> Thanks again for reading!


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